How can you take care of a child when you can't take care of yourself?

Question

Does anyone else have this fear?

Answer 1

I never had that fear, and I've been accused of that very same thing before, by people close to me actually. The thing is that nobody is ever really prepared to be a parent, no matter how many books they read or how many classes they go to beforehand. It's all about common sense, trusting your instinct, and just remembering to love...it's hard to be a parent, I won't argue about that, but it has been worth every minute, for me :)

Answer 2

This is not an easy question. I am told even the best of parents fear this.

First Are you sure you cannot take care of yourself, and in what form? If its financially there are things out there to Help Food Stamps,Welfare will give you 2/3 of your need and you will be called a cheater when you come up with the other third.

If its emotionally their are groups for this. Ask a good friend to be honest with you and to tell you if you can acquire the skills, or have the love.

If you can ask that question, the answer might be YES if you are capable to look out for the child's welfare.

Or depending where you are in your life, giving the away might be the answer-But not one, anyone should enter into lightly.

I am pro choice, but abortion is the very last door. A friend of mine had an abortion and i still cared about her, but I think Life is important.

Answer 3

In direct answer to the question asked: You could put the child up for adoption and then send monthy support checks (money) to the foster parents. This way, you are doing the best for the child - whilst still living however it is that you are already living.

It may not help your own situation out any; but at least its what's best for the child.

Answer 4

I don't have that fear myself, but my husband's ex-wife is in that situation. She's 29, but emotionally, only about 10, and she has their daughter. She doesn't know how to cook, clean, or anything else. Their daughter told me that all Mommy knows how to "cook" is hot dogs. He pays her $480 a month (plus an additional $200 a month because she claimed that he didn't pay child support for a month, plus attorney's fee. He did, but couldn't prove it at the time) and she lives with her parents who do everything for her. They're court ordered to meet half way because they live 330 miles apart. (She moved away from him.) She doesn't even go to drop off their daughter or pick her up. She sends her parents to do "the job." Her parents have to do a lot of things for her because she can't do it.

And just why does she have custody? As my husband says, it's because he has a part on his anatomy that she doesn't have.

Personally, we don't feel that she can take care of their child, and trying to get custody of her is an act of congress because of the laws. He really needs to prove her to be unfit.

She can't take care of herself. Not sure if it's that she can't or that she doesn't want to. She does work - at wal-mart. Nothing wrong with that, but she's been there for about 8 years or so, and is still working as a cashier. Just went to full time and just got benefits. My brother is a manager at another wal-mart and I had asked him about promotions within the company and he said that they're there if you want them. You just have to put in for them. We know that her parents didn't teach her how to cook or clean. My husband taught her how to drive (and that was when she was 25).

So, IMHO, you CAN'T take care of a child when you can't take care of yourself.

Answer 5

Nope

Answer 6

It's time to grow up. Know that it will be hard and uncomfortable some of the time, but get through it. Humble yourself for the sake of your child. Put the kids first. It's your duty. You can do it. Jesus Christ can give you the strength you need. Pray to Him . He will direct your path. He's there for you. Pray.

Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. [a]

2 I will say [b] of the LORD, "He is my refuge and my fortress,
my God, in whom I trust."

3 Surely he will save you from the fowler's snare
and from the deadly pestilence.

4 He will cover you with his feathers,
and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart.

5 You will not fear the terror of night,
nor the arrow that flies by day,

6 nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness,
nor the plague that destroys at midday.

7 A thousand may fall at your side,
ten thousand at your right hand,
but it will not come near you.

8 You will only observe with your eyes
and see the punishment of the wicked.

9 If you make the Most High your dwelling—
even the LORD, who is my refuge-

10 then no harm will befall you,
no disaster will come near your tent.

11 For he will command his angels concerning you
to guard you in all your ways;

12 they will lift you up in their hands,
so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.

13 You will tread upon the lion and the cobra;
you will trample the great lion and the serpent.

14 "Because he loves me," says the LORD, "I will rescue him;
I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name.

15 He will call upon me, and I will answer him;
I will be with him in trouble,
I will deliver him and honor him.

16 With long life will I satisfy him
and show him my salvation."

Answer 7

You can't. . .

Take care of yourself first before going around messing up others.

Answer 8

Nope,because I do take care of my 3 boys by myself and do something for me everyday......

Answer 9

well,you have to grow up.so,dont have a baby if you are not yet ready.