Why do I feel like this?

Question

Everytime I go to a house party or go to a bar I feel layed back most of the time,I just sit there and keep myself to myself,and sometimes I feel paranoid,and I feel like no one has no time for me.
I would really love to blend in,but I just dont know
how. I do feel awful about it,I would love to blend in with everyone. How can I help myself on this?
Please you guys,please give me advise. Thank YYou's. x x x

Answer 1

Maybe you should , just talk to pepole, and dont worry what pepole think of you. They are just shallow, just have a smile on your face and just be yourself.

Answer 2

If you get the same repeated situation then I guess mainly that a change of behaviours is needed. You may also need to reevaluate your beliefs about yourself and your social abilities.

Ask yourself - What is it that you're doing that keeps you from being integrated with the others? The outcome to this old pattern is likely to strengthen limiting beliefs that you have of yourself and your potential. I guess focussing on your withdrawal and how you go about 'keeping yourself to yourself' will illustrate the smaller detail of how you get this old pattern of results.

Also - identify your motivations for getting to 'blend' in with the others. You'll need sufficient motivation in order to change your behaviour.

I've spent hours at parties and other social gatherings reeling in agony at my isolation. I've also had wonderful experiences of feeling connected to others and been an energetic sociable participant.

Remember, you're probably feeling similar anxieties to many of the people around you. So, talking to someone that may be with you, before getting there, could also help - you may be surprised if they tell you that they're not confident or feeling awkward etc.

It may be possible that your friend(s) will watch out for you, introducing you to others and/or asking the host to make an extra effort to watch out for you becoming isolated and giving you a succession of introductions, to help prevent you getting time on your hands - this could prevent paranoia, which is a common issue for people who feel excluded. Think about what you may be needing and let yourself ask any friends if they can help to meet your needs. Eg. someone to stay with you more etc.

Remember, there is no failure, only feedback. Good luck.Rob

Answer 3

You're probably feeling left out. When you go to a house party or a bar, why don't you talk to people there instead of just sitting there? Introduce yourself, and you'll probably make some new friends. But if you're feeling down or whatever, talk to someone you can trust.
Good luck

Answer 4

start with your clothes. i bet you wear bland stuff to hide - if thats the case, then you have lost before you even turn up. Its a viscious circle. you expect to be ignored so you dress and act to be ignored so you are ignored !

and DO NOT sit down. You have to be noticed. sat down its very hard for someone to approach and start a conversation.
get yourself a book on how to talk to people - most folks want to talk about themselves so just listen and keep the convo going.

Good luck

Answer 5

I feel like that soemtime,and im quite a quiet person.How about making conversation with people in everyday life ,and build your confidence up?Then when it comes to party s and not knowing what to do,you will hopefullly have more confidence to make new friends and meet new people!

Answer 6

for start don't drink too much, be happy and talkative, and rem amber at the end of the day life is short so enjoy your self, if you end home along so what try another day, you will have a lots of girls on you arms, women like comment on shoes hair, and so on

Answer 7

it depends in how old are you