Jealous of my Friends???

Question

Help! Im really jealous of my for a lot of reasons. First of all, she has a lot of clothes from Abercrombie and i can't really afford them. I have stuff at Aero and AE but... 2nd of all she's so social, she meets ppl and talks to them like she's known them for a long time! So mostly she gets along with everybody! People are just drawn to her and im like her exact opposite! Im extremely shy and when i meet new ppl it takes me awhile to become friends or i like cant talk to them well. Especially boys, and she's really atheltic too! It seems like everybody loves her! Im so jealous, but idk how to get over it! Do u guys have any advice 4 me???

Answer 1

Don't worry too much about your friends clothes because you can be stylish without buying name brand (no matter what the industry says). I have found the most interesting people to have their own style and not that of a magazine model. Everyone has different styles, interests, and features that should be complimented by their clothes, not defined by them.

On to shyness... There is nothing wrong with taking your time to get a feel for people before befriending them. This is how I have managed for the past 29 years and i have some very true friends because of it.

I have gotten better at small talk and chatting with people i barely know. It has taken practice and finding what is true and genuine for you. Not everyone who says "how are you?" actually waits for a reply. If asking a question (what do you think of...?) be sure you really want to hear the answer, you may have to listen to it anyway.

Another thing to keep in mind is that everyone (and I mean EVERYONE) is insecure in some way at some point. Some have learned how to move past it and not let it get in the way of what makes them happy.

You will always risk being hurt, embarrassed, etc. by speaking up, stepping up, and making yourself noticed. But you miss out on a fun and fufilling life if you never try.

One thought would be to join an activity or group. School, church, or community sponsored, make sure you are interested and that you stick it out at least one full year or session. If it is something you can do without your friend it may help you discover your own talents.

If your friend is really your friend she will support you and help you see all the great things she sees in you. If she is your friend so that you can adore her like everyone else, get a new friend.

Feel free to e-mail me if you wanna chat about this more.

Good luck!

Answer 2

Calm down. You can fix this. All you have to do is be glad that you have such a good person for a friend! Also, everyone has something someone else wants. It's natural. Just remember, it doesn't matter what clothes you wear, how many guys you talk to, or any of that. You never know what could be going on at home. She might get those many clothes, because her parents are always gone or not around. No one is perfect. She might want to live a regular life like you! She might even be jealous of you. You never know. Think about all of your advantages also. Just don't get too prideful.

Answer 3

You need to stop focusing on what she has that you dont - and instead focus on the things you have to offer!! I know it can be hard (I still get a bit jealous of my friends from time to time) but you need to realise that it would be boring if everyone was the same, and you need to be yourself!

Dont worry about the clothes she has - there are PLENTY of really flattering cheap clothes around, and if it looks amazing on you then nobody will care that its not a brand name - in fact they'd probably be MORE impressed and jealous because they've spent heaps more on their clothes which dont look nearly as good! Everyone loves a bargain!

Dont worry about being shy, it generally just means that you're a better friend, loyal and sweet, but try and be a little more outgoing, even if it means just smiling at people a bit more.

Good luck - remember you are just as good as your friend, if not better!! It has a lot to do with your attitude and confidence, so smile!!

Answer 4

I used to be very jealous of my best friend. She was soooo dang perfect in my eyes. She was beautiful, outgoing, popular, had a fab body, and everyone fauned over her. My jealousy kept getting worse and worse and her attitude toward me was steadilly slipping too, until her grandma sat us down seperately and told me that she was also jealous of me, but for different reasons. I was intelligent, shy, nutty, and had more long term friends. I never had guys flinging themselves at me like she did, but once they started talking to me they found it hard to stop. So, we both learned that neither was better than the other. We were both great in different ways. We complimented each other and would never be willing to give up what we had to get what we thought we wanted. Don't know if that helped any but best wishes.

Answer 5

believe mee...i've been through the abercrombie phase and im over it...i dont really like it anymore it has way overpriced things for just some trashy clothes...i like ae!! they have really cute jeans and sweaters. stick with ae. as for the social thing... be yourself and act like you've known people for a long time too. Create a new year's resolution to be more social and to really work your outfits. and for being athletic.. i would say try running. It relieves stress and keeps you veryyy fit. goooooood luuuucckk.

P.S. If you're worried about the costs of clothes try saving up for something you'd really love and would wear all the time. Save up for one thing at a time. ((i.e. ralph lauren polo))

Answer 6

Everybody is created different. My advise is to just be supportive of your friend. Also, try to get to know people more. You can start by smiling or saying hi and asking how are they and stuff. Or you can also start playing some sports. You can join sports so you can meet more people! =) Don't worry, jealousy is a normal thing. In order to get over it, you just have to feel good about yourself first.

Answer 7

Jealousy is a terrible thing it will eat you up but you've probably experienced that already

What you need to do is stop focusing on what you are NOT
and look at what you are

I am sure there is a lot that you can offer remember if we were all the same life would suck so be different at 100%

Good Luck I can't wait to see your light Shine

Answer 8

clothes don't make the person, so that shouldn't bother you. gaining social confidence takes time. a lot of time. you just need to be confident in the good things about you (there are lots) and work on the things you have more trouble excepting. don't waste you energy envying a friend when you could use that energy becoming a better person. i am all for self-improvement, but remember that you want to be a better you. not a mini-verison of your friend.

Answer 9

You do have your own gifts, talents and abilities. You are special in your own way. Be yourself. Excell at things you are good at. Everyone is different and everyone has weaknesses and strengths. Be a good friend to those that you have or make in the future. Don't compare yourself with others. I can guarantee you that she does have weaknesses. They may not be visible, but somewhere, she has some. We all do.

Answer 10

Ok, well same situation, sorta. and its my cousin.. she is tall and skinny and pretty. but she always finds these little things to pick on herself. like her stretch marks. i tell her be happy she isnt like me.and she does the same thing. like she knows the people she just meets. but be happy, you are shy, so that keeps you away from opening up to the wrong way. u r unique. h.e.l.l. i wish i could at least afford aero and that stuff but i cant. it doesnt matter what you wear. its who u are! ok?
dont be jealous! she's prolly jealous of you for something. so be happy!