Are we attracted to the person or just the image we have of that person?

Answer 1

your question reminds me of a little "practice" i would engage in when i came in contact with someone i found attractive. i would immediately watch what my mind would "start doing". it would "automatically" jump into what i termed "very favorable projections mode". that is i would assign to the person the most amazing qualities and "wonderfullness", etc. perhaps this is one of nature's ploys for aiding procreation, for all i know. anyway, the lesson is: be conscious and aware of your "mind content". that way you don't begin taking what your brainchatter offers up as "the truth". i found that the more i meditated, the quieter my mind became, and that the less chatter there was, the less i was led astray by my own fantasies and illusions ;-)

Answer 2

I think that people are attracted to the image that they perceive of an individual. I think that, especially in a relationship, an individual puts together a "mask" of who they want to appear as. This is often instinctual, and cannot be controlled. I think thats the reason that marriages often break up. Once people are married, they dont see the need to pretend to be someone anymore, and let out their "true" side. Because the significant other fell for the fake, they think that their, "love" has become someone else.

This often leads to breakups in families.

So, yeah, I think that people are attracted to the image that they perceive, and not necessarily the real person.

Answer 3

i would say that image we have of that person. It's not the smile that im attracted to, its the way the smile makes me feel when i see it, its not eyes the im attracted to, its the way i feel when the eyes are looking into mine that im attracted to, its the thought of that person, not the person themselves. Thats why when couples are apart they long to be in eachothers company, but once they are together after a while they just want to get away from that person.

Answer 4

People have different bases of attraction. Some people look at the appearance and outer beauty of another, while others tend to look at the inner beauty of someone. My belief is that certain people tend to look at the image of a person (physical), while others look more at the actual person on the inside (personal/spiritual).

Answer 5

It is not the person nor the image of the person, but rather an image of what we WANT the person to be in our minds that attracts us to them...

It's very wierd...

Answer 6

Something, some quality or charachteristic brings to mind the "ideal" person, but we project ALL of the ideal person onto the poor only-human. Then we find out the reality of the other person, so we try to change him/her to conform with our ideal. We are really in love with with the other, perfectly complementary half of ourselves within ourselves, but we look outside because all that we have attained has come from outside.

Answer 7

I think we are attracted to what we see in a person
we see what we want to see
which is why eventually relationships fail once the person realizes the other was not who they thought they were

Answer 8

definately the image. you dont know what the person is really like, itz only the way you see them

Answer 9

the image we have. in the starting. then the person, as we come to know him/her more nicely ('nicely' sounds like i am cleaning a house full of spider webs, yuckkk!!!!).

Answer 10

and i quote from my favorite book from my favorite author, Ayn Rand ---"Love is the expression of one's values, the greatest reward you can earn for the moral qualities you have achieved in your character and person, the emotional price paid by one man for the joy he receives from the virtues of another."