If I am beautiful, sexy, and have good sex with my man do I have to do anything else?

Question

It seems that men only care about food,sex, and sports. Women need so Many other things that men cannot figure out and don't care about.
If I can cook, and have good sex do I have to do anything else like listen to him, be a good friend, have any goals, contribute financially, etc?

Answer 1

If you are basing a successful marriage on cooking and sex you will probably be divorced within five years.

Having been married for 27 years (longer than about 80 of ALL couples in the United States) I speak with some authority on this topic. I would listen carefully to what I'm going to tell you:

1. Talking together as a couple will insure a successful much more than wild, animal sex will.
2. Spending time romantically (physically) actually IS a big part of a successful marriage. Women who keep themselves attractive and men who keep themselves attractive will help to keep that spark of sexual attraction alive within their spouse longer than spouses that let themselves go.
3. When I ask my wife out on a date I call her on the phone at home and act exactly like I did when I was 21 and we were dating. I ask her if she is free a certain night, what time she has to be home, if she likes a certain kind of food or if she would like to see a certain movie and then I ask her out. She giggles like she is 19 again and we go on a date. She does the same with me when she asks me out on a date.
4. My wife still brushes her hair and puts on lip gloss when we are home alone together and the kids are gone. She makes herself look attractive and alluring. I also make sure I'm cleanly shaved so my face isn't rough and scratchy (which she likes) and make sure my hair is clean and brushed and my teeth are brushed so that I am appealing to my sweetheart when we spend time together.
5. The time leading up to romance is more important than the time spent in romance itself.
6. When my wife talks to me I turn down the television and turn and face her and listen. I ask questions, add comments, and laugh at funny comments. She does the same.
7. When I'm faced with a dilemma I ask my wife's opinion and listen to her input. In fact in my marriage I've listened to one and ONLYH one person's input when it comes to our home, sons, finances, and goals: my sweethearts. NO one else.
8. I never, ever, EVER, EVER criticize my wife in front of anyone else. And when we are alone I don't insult or make cutting comments about her decisions. I always support her views and opinions. And NO ONE, EVER, EVER is allowed to say ANYTHING negative about my wife. EVER. Not friends, not her parents, not my parents, not my sons. Whenever sides need to be taken I am ALWAYS on my wife's side. ALWAYS. There are no exceptions to this rule. EVER. She is the same.
9. Even thought we've made financial mistakes through the years we made them together. It is NEVER a situation where we fight over the fact that she wanted one thing and I wanted another. We talk about it, decide together, and then face the consequences together and NO ONE criticizes my wife.
10. And lastly. I compliment my wife constantly. I learned a long time ago that what you tell a person over and over they soon become. A husband who constantly criticizes his wife's weight or lack there-of or hair color or eyes or nose or boobs or anything about her will soon see her become what he says about her. If he says she is fat she WILL soon become fat. If on the other hand he is constantly telling his sweetheart how beautiful she is, how hot she is, how slender she is, how sexy she is--before too long she will BECOME exactly what she is constantly told.


And most important of all.


The two most important lines you will ever use in a marriage are:

1. I'm sorry.
2. I love you

Couples that use these two lines often (even when they are "right",) stay married forever. Couples that can't bring themselves to use these two lines will be divorced over and over and over again.


And there you have it.

Answer 2

Why wouldn't you want to do those things? A relationship would be so boring and meaningless if you didn't listen to your partner or have goals together- cooking and having sex is for sex buddies. I think that is what you need. If you don't want all aspects of a relationship it's not worth getting into. Eventually that man will want all those things and if you can't provide them he will find someone who can. Just because it seems like that's all men care about doesn't mean that is all they do care about or at least anyone worth while to be with.

Answer 3

That's entirely up to you. However, there are plenty of women who are beautiful, sexy, have good sex and can cook. Do you want to be his friend, set your own goals, and contribute financially or are you looking for a pimp daddy that only wants you for sex? What are your needs? If you don't want to contribute more then don't. Just remember you will probably end up with a total loser if all he wants you for is sex and to cook his meals. Do what works for you, but don't cry in 5 years when he finds someone more interesting or maybe just younger.

Answer 4

Hot women are a dime a dozen. The hard part is finding one that's got a brain in her head and is interesting also. Who the heck wants to be married to someone that is hot and good in bed but boring out of the bedroom? You know when you hit a certain age you won't be hot anymore, then what is he going to do? If you're not interesting to him anymore he will just find another, younger version of you.
You really should consider stepping up your game to include having a personality and being an interesting person. Then he will be much less likely to dump you when you turn 50.

Answer 5

YES... If not for him... DEFINITLY FOR YOURSELF. You should have YOUR OWN goals in life for sure!!!
You cannot rely on others forever.

My husband would have never married me if I wasnt a good listener, or a good friend.

As far as the financial stuff, thats between you two. If he wants to support you while you stay at home and raise children, then that is up to you. If he wants you to get a job, or if you already have one, I think you should work and YES, help financially.

In a relationship, its a 2 way street. both parties must participate, regardless of how you look, and how the food and sex are.

"You maybe beautiful, but you must learn to work, you cannot eat your beauty." Always remember that.

Answer 6

I think that just being those thing will work for a little while.. But when you meet people who have been married for a long time and ask the husband what it about her thet made him love her for so long they usually wont say because she was good in bed back in the day!! they will most likely say that she is special one of a kind eiather because of her loyalty or personality or many things but probly not her sex.

Answer 7

Well, you are well on your way to understanding.

Men and women have different priorities. Men want the things you want and want to know that the woman they are with is "on the team."

That means she is supporting him, and not nagging him.

There is nothing wrong with caring about food, sex and sports anymore than there is caring about fashion, decorating and relationships.

I believe you have to do ALL or at least most of the things in your last sentence. Ask him what he wants from you, he will be the best, most reliable source of info.

Answer 8

There's a lot more to a happy relationship than being used for sex, food, and money. What you have, hunny, is not healthy.

He should inspire you, and nurture you, and encourage you to be the best woman you can possibly be. If all he's doing is having sex with you, then you are nothing more than a mastrubation aid, not a partner.

You deserve more. You deserve someone who completes you.

Answer 9

Im glad you are concerned about keeping men happy, most women arent. Ok the stuff you named, we do need like:goals,friendship, listening. Basically the same thing you need and look for, we need. We are humans too, we just dont act like it.

Answer 10

Just what is your question?

All you have to do in life is pursue your passions without doing to another that which you wouldn't want done to yourself.

If you don't do this for yourself, then its only a matter of time before you've wasted your entire life. Certainly you don't want to waste your life, do you?

You ought to look into philosophy... the unexamined life is a wasted life.