Okay...So I met this guy on new years eve and he just came to virginia ....so like we met and he liked me a lot and ever since then we've been talking on the phone...I have just recently broken up with my ex boyfriend...I didn't not have such a good relationship since he wanted to have a change of heart (a join his christian-hood again) (which i completly understand and I let him go) so like...that same day I called the guy I met on new years eve...we were talking and he asked me to marry him! I said yes and we started making all these plans...The next day he calls me and he asks me to come to Live with him (PuertoRico) I am just so confused because I like himand i've learned that its better to learn to love than to love and get hurt! He wants to kids when he turns 20!And i have plans on going to the army and completing my career! he is coming back in 5 months and I guess we might get married...im only 17 but getting married is a huge thing because we are catholics...what should i do?
2007-01-17 04:59:11 · 14 answers · asked by ChIkaBuEnA 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I already posted on this question!!
I will say it again:
Holy crap woman... I mean, GIRL!! You just MET this guy!!!!
And you're so young!!! He just wants to reach his stupid goal by 20... and he doesn't care with who. Do NOT fall into his pathetic trap. YOU ARE REALLLLLY GONNA GET HURT... and it won't be so easy to change your mind once you are married.......
There is something up here...
And no, it's not just his HOOHAA.
.
2007-01-17 05:04:32 · answer #1 · answered by ( Kelly ) 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
17????? you gotta be kidding!!!!!!!!! A woman isn't ready for marriage until:
1. She has a degree or skill that she can use to support herself.
At 17 you don't qualify. If you do marry this guy, here's your future:
First, you don't even know this guy, and you'll probably fall for the line "I love you, have my baaaabbbbyyyyyyyy...."
As practicing catholics, you'll be pregnant before the end of the year, and have a baby by this time next year. (oh, yes, you WILL be pregnant --- that is what sex if for!!!!! Nature made it that way.....) You will hardly have known the guy, and already there is a third very demanding person in your relationship.... children are not bonding, they are divisive....ask any mom who had one under 18 or 19, and on short notice...... Children put a strain on a commitment even when each knows the other well. In less than 1 1/2 years you will be having arguments you never thought possible, there is vomit from the kid all over everywhere, in the bed, on the floor, dirty diapers, and he won't help you change them, crying at 2a, feedings, you're drop-dead tired, he is too, the house is a mess, finances are scarce, you can't work, and have no skills, yadayadayada.... . Sex isn't fun anymore as this kid consumes most of your 27 hour day. Wake up, hon,,, what ARE you thinking????? Your hormones are outa control.... get your head back on straight..... Marriage is hard enough without children. You will soon be divorced (within 5 years -- max) and now be single mom and you aren't even 25. Your likelihood of finding another husband is slim -- most guys figure other guys' kids are baggage big time. You will spend the next 20 years and $250,000 to get this kid to age 20.... there goes some of the best years of your life. And I didn't pull these figures out of a hat -- read the stats, Google them or use any search engine.....and read the questions on this site!!!!!!
Most say things like:
"We were so in love,and now we have this child... he doesn't help around the house, I'm exhausted, he's out every night with his friends, I have no money, I'm stuck here, and have no way to leave, I have no where to go, he has become abusive, does what he wants, I am crying most of the time.....yadadadadyyadayda.... What do I do?????"
Read them sweetie......
2007-01-17 05:47:17 · answer #2 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was engaged when I was 24 and married when I was 26 Our wedding colors were a pale peach and chocolate brown We each had our brothers as witnesses (2 total), it was a very small wedding (14 people were there including us and our reverend) Our reception was held a month after our wedding, and we did not have assigned seating, most people didn't sit, it was a cocktail party We had a small chocolate cake and then a variety of desserts for people to choose, I think there were 5 different choices We went to Maui for two weeks We got married in Gleneden Beach, OR, a tiny town on the coast, just outside of Lincoln City
2016-05-24 00:24:22 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No.. you should not get married. You don't know the first thing about him. You met him less than a month ago! You are only 17! OMG. Its just insane. You are a child and you should not be getting married this young.
And another thing.. if you have to ask.. then the answer is no. Getting married is not something trivial like what shoes go with this outfit. THINK THINGS THROUGH. Its a lot more expensive to get divorced than it is to get married.
What kind of guy asks somebody to marry them after knowing them a couple weeks? Make sure he is not a serial killer.
2007-01-17 05:38:41 · answer #4 · answered by ? 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Every time a man said to me I love you and lets get married I would of been married at least 20 times. You follow your career first. There's nothing to be confused about. Forces on your future. This man want to bring you to Puerto Rico for sex. and for he can have you were he wants you. Your only 17. Thank about it. In 10 yrs from now where are you going to be. His wife in about 4 or more kids. In nothing to fall back on. You need to think. And he wants kids when he turns 20. How are you and him going to live. With his family? Are you sure hes going to have a good enough job to support you and a baby?And does your parents know? You need to read ten stupid things women do to mess up their lives by Dr. Laura C. Schlessinger. Stop listen to someone else. Because he says he loves you. This is someone who making you feel good, not looking out for you. You can't live on that.Please do the right thing. Your going to regret if you don't follow your first mind. In you know what that is. You told us you want a career in you know what you want.Trust me you will regret it if you don't do it. Your the one who going to be stuck with the kids and where he going to be. You think buy your side? At twenty something, you think a man in his twenty is going to stay home every night. Girl think.
2007-01-17 05:40:00 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
where the fire wow slow down the key word is might get marry listen to your soul youre too young and going to puerto rico from virginia and then you say i like him that not love and married is forever and love is not a game give your self time to find the true meaning of love its took me 51 years to find my soulmate and i had to go half way around the world to find her good luck the army sound good for you it will help you to grow its nice he has plan but what about your plan
2007-01-17 05:25:28 · answer #6 · answered by nightman122554 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
seems like you're not ready to get married yet... you said, gettin' married is a huge thing... it is, there's a lot of responsibilities accompanied to it... it's not a food that you can just throw in the trash can when it gets spoil... you're both young, it might not work... why don't you two explore things, enjoy each other's company as bf & gf, concentrate in your career then when the right time comes & you're still inlove with each other, then go for it...
2007-01-17 05:11:02 · answer #7 · answered by samz_eyes 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Are you serious??? You just met this guy two weeks ago on New Year's Eve??? NO WAY should you get married!!! Live life, find yourself, go to college, then think about settling down.
2007-01-17 05:06:22 · answer #8 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Oh do what you want. Some people need to ruin their lives in order to learn the lesson properly. Go ahead. Start learning.
2007-01-17 05:31:01 · answer #9 · answered by heathen 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NO WAY. You're only 17, and you want to move to Puerto Rico? Don't worry, this too will pass. You need to achieve your own goals first.
2007-01-17 05:44:27 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋