2007-01-17 04:49:38 · 14 answers · asked by twatwaffle 3 in Entertainment & Music ➔ Polls & Surveys
Yup, your screen name says it all.
Another ****.
2007-01-17 04:56:08 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
Intuition said it all, but I'll add this too:
You can't "convince", "coerce", or "manipulate" someone into doing anything without building some resentment. This goes for everything in a relationship, not just sex or swinging. It has to be something they want to do also.
Basically you'll need to bring it up to him in a non-threatening kind of way. Like intuition said, you don't want to come across as him not being "enough" for you and you are looking for something more. This is the most common reaction when one member of a couple brings up the idea to another.
And then again, you may be surprised and he says "you know, I've been thinking about that too." ;-)
For us, it started as "what ifs". Stuff like our neighbors or friends would be over for a night of drinking and of course as adults can do, the talk would get toward the sexual side. Nothing would happen, but afterward we'd say to each other "what if we swapped? Would you want to? Do you think they would?"
So you can see we were already thinking along the same lines together. From there, over a period of time the talk just got more serious about it. So there was no "convincing" in our relationship. Swinging was a mutual attraction.
As intuition pointed out, check-out The Swingers Board for some really good information from hopeful swingers, newbies, and veterans alike.
2007-01-20 07:16:10 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Doing anything to "convince" someone is actually counter-productive. This is a highly personal decision, as it involves their sense of morality and ethics. For many (probably most) there would be no way for them to resolve their conviction that swinging is just wrong. To ask them to overlook that and act against their better judjment is extremely unfair and unloving. If after you have offered this as a possible experiment for your marriage, your husband has considered it and does not want to do it, his decision is to be considered final and must be respected. To not take no for an answer is to break rule #1 in swinging: NO MEANS NO.
What you will want to do is to start by hinting at it first. If he seems possibly responsive or curious, try asking him outright. Maybe watch some porn together some night, one with a group scene, and ask him if he's ever fantasized about trying something like that. You'll inevitibly get the same question asked back at you. Tell him that you have, and this is what turns you on about it and this is why it turns you on. Basically, you just want to open up the dialogue. If you find yourself becoming aroused talking about it, why not take advantage of that sexual energy? Turn it into some wild sex between the two of you. Let him see that letting out your inner "sex goddess" in this way is a REALLY good thing for him! ;) Afterward, be sure to find out about his feelings about it all. Some men may be wildly turned on by the fact that their woman is so sexually uninhibited, and may be all for anything that helps her acheive that "sweet spot". But other men may not be quite as thrilled, worrying that it's the fantasy that you love, not him. Worrying that you will abandon him when the bigger better deal comes along, or that he's just not man enough for you. Be very sensitive to these feelings, and do not trivialize them. Be prepared to answer some tough questions.
Swinging does work beautifully for a lucky few relationships, but in order to do it in a healthy way, you can't believe that it's wrong. You can't do something you feel morally conflicted about without facing the emotional, psychological, and spiritual consequences sooner or later.
Best of luck!
2007-01-17 15:36:38 · answer #3 · answered by intuition897 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
intro duce the lifestyle to him little by little, ease it on him, bring other ppl around show that your intrested in that person , drop hints, little ones. he'll get the point.
2007-01-17 12:56:03 · answer #4 · answered by dlife78 1 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Bring him over for dinner sometime soon and talk to my hubby; we did that once.
2007-01-17 12:54:04 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
tell him it will be fun and he get to see u in ur new bathing suite that he bought 4 u along time ago
2007-01-19 10:19:35 · answer #6 · answered by </33 5 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Hmm..bring him over, we'll convince him. Muhahaha.
2007-01-17 12:55:49 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Feed him a couple of kittens. They are known aphrodisiacs.
2007-01-18 10:17:02 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 2⤋
If he doesn't want to, then you won't be able to. This is something you should have discussed before getting married.
2007-01-17 12:55:18 · answer #9 · answered by Beck 4 · 0⤊ 2⤋
Offer for him to watch you & another woman first.
2007-01-17 12:55:47 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋