Sex After A Newborn??

Question

here's the deal... my girlfriend and I have been in a same sex relationship for 6 months. 7 months ago she had a 'one nighter' and got pregnant. We have a house together and I have totally commited myself to her and child. She recently got a new job and I'm having trouble getting used to not being around each other all the time. When she comes home shes too tired to be physically intimate. And I know after our baby is born there just won't be much time/opportunity to make love. Am I terrible for worrying about something like that? To those of you in relationships with children - how did you balance it out, and what can I do to make it easier for her to feel intimate again?

Answer 1

She is 7 months pregnant...she is hauling around probably at least 20 or so extra pounds and her body is building a human being. Trust me - she is TIRED and most likely doesn't feel too SEXY! And on top of that, she's probably HUGE and does not feel like being intimate at this time in her life.
You are correct - when that baby comes, she will be even more exhausted than she is now and not only will she be too tired for sex, she'll be too busy with the baby.
You are going to have to muster up some patience and sensitivity and deal with the reality that you all are about to have a baby that requires all your attention. And if you are lucky, every now and then the planets MIGHT align and there might be a 10 minute window where the baby is fast asleep and she is not too tired for intimacy.
Unfortunately for you, this time in her life is not about being intimate - it is about the baby she about to bring into the world and if you are as committed to her as you say, you will just have to accept that. One day, when the baby is older and more predictable, intimacy will resume but for now, you will just have to make do with sub-par performance if you are lucky enough to even get that.
Our baby is 7-months-old and we are just now able to even think about sex again.
Good luck.

Answer 2

No, you are not terrible for thinking about this, you just love her, that's all.

I'm totally straight, but I think it's probably the same thing.

She is telling the truth! I would say, about being very tired. Cause she is not at all used to all the changes that her body is making. Getting a new job at a time like this can be stressful, no matter what.

What you can do is just give her time, and space. That would give you a better chance to going back to being friends. And friendship can do alot to ease stress, and help her be comfortable around you.

These days we never know from one day to another, ya know? I am not sure I should say this, cause I don't want to alarm or upset you.

But all we can do today is have relationships with open arms, and let whatever come what may.

If you get through all this you're relationship may deepen. On the other hand, there is a chance all these changes may change her feelings.

Ya just gotta be accepting either way. I remember something like, The ties of low are always made of satin cords? Something like that, and it means giving the other complete freedom always, to decide what they really want.

Answer 3

While I was pregnant, I wanted sex all the time - it didn't matter if I was tired or not. Every woman is different, though. Her hormone levels might not be the same as mine were.
I wanted sex even more than I did when I was pregnant after the baby was born. (I didn't wait nearly as long as they said to before having sex, either. I only waited a couple of weeks.
It was alittle uncomfortable, but not bad.)
A baby will change a lot of things in your routine, but your sex life shouldn't have to suffer. Mine didn't.
The key is to make sure new mom is in the mood. You can do that by doing a lot of things for her. Get up with the child without complaining during the night, so she can get some rest. Take her out to eat (with baby) so she doesn't have to cook.
Hire someone to come in once a week to clean and do laundry.
Hire a sitter one night a week and go out alone on a date.

Answer 4

Dont worry about it I just had a baby 6 month ago and I cant get enough. I had a C section but wanted sex 2 weeks after giving birth so I did. It will just be because she is actually tired but it will all be over soon enough.

Answer 5

your a good man for being there for her and the baby and i think everyone worries about this because having a baby and a job is very very exhausting!!!!!!!!!! just make sure she is happy and make her feel sexy and good about her self, buy her flowers make sure the house is clean and you take care of everything if you dont have a job of course, if you have a job then cleaning should be done equal of course. you will also be tired once the baby comes and sex wont happen as much as you may like because of being tired, just remember she is tired and she will be for along time my son is 22 months old and im still tired to be very physical just like i said make her feel good tell her shes beautiful stuff like that you know good luck


IM SORRY I DIDNT READ IT CLOSLEY YOUR A GOOD WOMAN FOR STICKING WITH HER AND JUST DO EVERYTHING I SAID

Answer 6

it may be a while... i'm not trying to depress you, but many women do not feel sexy or want sex while pregnant. and the recovery and sleepless nights after delivery can also keep you out of the mood. i'd suggest to just stay supportive, and try other means of being intimate, like back rubs, foot massages, etc... i know it's not the same as sex, but it will keep you two close.

Answer 7

it's definately hard, but when your pregant it takes alot of energy outta of you. your tired all the time, and sex is the last thing on your mind. Just be supportive and don't get mad at her if she doesn't feel like having sex. Try to be patient, and understanding, it will get better. Congrats on your baby, wish you guys the best.

Answer 8

Well if you do they will be close