Has anyone ever had anxiety that led them to believe they were falling out of love with their spouse?

Question

If so....How did you cope with it, did it get better, and how long did it take to improve....

Answer 1

Anxiety doesn't make you fall in love as a matter of fact it would drive you the other way.()

Answer 2

Yes. My husband and I became, basically, roommates. I was the one who did the cooking, cleaning, housework, child-rearing and contributed financially by being a working mom. He was the one that liked to start projects involving demolition around our house that he never completed.

The catalyst was that I had secretly saved about $1700 and for Christmas I told him I wanted to take a honeymoon in Cancun (we never had a honeymoon b/c we were married young). Within 48 hours he cleaned out that secret bank account and spent it on pouring a concrete porch behind the house.

Then it hit me one morning while I was taking a shower with a garbage bag covering a wall he had ripped out and never retiled (for over a year): I was not happy. I was becoming miserable. I was unable to be a good mother.

I knew that I loved him as a person and a father, but I realized I no longer loved him as a husband. I think it boils down to not being appreciated the way you should in the marriage.

How did I cope? Unfortunately we divorced - it wasn't until I left him that he realized what he had done to drive me away. We tried several times to reunite but I still couldn't get over the knots of knowing that I fell out of love with him. No one ever understands that feeling until you've been there.

I recommend counseling - it helped for us a little (when he showed up). He told me one day that if HE had REALIZED that he was driving me away he would've been at every counseling session and prevented the inevitable.

You have to tell him how you feel and don't hold back one single detail or feeling. He has to be part of the solution and the two of you have to communicate. If you know you no longer love him then step back, take a breather, live apart for a while. Distance makes the heart grow fonder and it allows time for the marriage to mend.

I don't know if any of this helps - I wish I could've fallen back in love with my husband because life would be so much easier. I've been divorced for 6 years now and can't bring myself to start another relationship for fear that it'll happen again.

I wish you all the best and chin up. Be honest with yourself, be honest with him and have a bautiful life either way.

Answer 3

I did, and I actually had an anxiety attack when the thought first came across my mind. Then I had a few anxiety attacks when I thought about it after wards. I talked to him about it, and I talked to friends about it. Of course when I talked to him about it, he twisted it around and it was a huge fight that lasted for a week. or more. It was intense. I realized that I was falling out of love with him, and I questioned if It was love that I felt for him, after a fight. He was shouting at me, calling me all sorts of names. I shall not mention because I'm embarrassed. I just felt so degraded, hurt, ashamed, unloved, and then I began to question if I did love him. So we talked about it after wards, and everything is back to normal, basically anyway. It took almost 2 weeks to sort through it all. It didn't get anybetter sadly. Now he has another thing to say when we're arguing, " Oooh am I being verbally abusive again?! Better watch out! I might become violent like them men on oprah you talked about, I think you better dump me then." Just another thing to fight about.

-.-'

Answer 4

Yes. Read THE FIVE LOVE LANGUAGES by Gary Chapman. The first "in love" is really infatuation. While it pretends to be love, it isn't. It is really self-centered. When it ends, and it will, then either real love takes its place or not. (usually not, which is why so many marriages end in divorce). Realize that Love sex and marriage are a great gift that the Almighty gave men. If you take the gift apart, you destroy it.

Answer 5

you wont always feel like you love your spouse. you can keep going with the commitment you have for this person.
when i feel like i am falling out of love,i tell him i love him so much and do things to show him i do. i express my love even more than usual till the feeling comes back and i am normalised in my emotions.
otherwise if u let that feeling of falling out of love linger, u might actually fall out of love

Answer 6

Who says it's going to improve. Give it sometime & see where it heads. Don'tmake any rash decisions.

Answer 7

nope. and most probably if u have this anxiety it means love said bye bye