In Sep. 2004 I got married. For the first 4 months, I would get to see my him 1 or 2 nights a week, he was always with his brothers. I got tired of being alone so gave him the decision to spend more time with me & our 2 kids, or move out. He left, and said he wanted a divorce. I started seeing someone 2 months later, then decided to give us1 more change. From Dec. 05 to Nov. 06 I talked to over 10 girls (found #'s in cell phone) they had all said he was trying to get with them. When asked he would turn very angry & defensive. I found myself begging him to tell me WHY? Never once an answer, admission, or appology. He says he never cheated & they were lying, but I was a whore for dating while we were seperated. I found out I am pregnant & want to try to save our marriage. He is unappreciative, mean & hurtful when he is upset, then when I cry he gets mad. When I try to tell him how I feel he laughs at me. I told him if he wants to leave he can go, he says no, but still no change.
2007-01-16 20:35:07 · 16 answers · asked by confused mom 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
You are all over the place, seek help for yourself, then your marriage!
2007-01-16 20:54:05 · answer #1 · answered by Anarchy99 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh ur all over the place... first of all he gave u a green light when HE asked for a divorce so u shouldn't feel bad. A real man wouldn't call the mother of his children a whore, this guy has self-esteem issues so he feels good by making u feel bad, hence he's a loser. 10 girls?? sorry but there is no marriage here and you should get out, pronto divorce him and slap some serious child support on his a**. Let your children make you happy and if a gazillion women have made it as single mothers so can you, all u gotta do is be strong for the people who matter, your children. It is better to ditch this loser, you'll be happier in the long run, and so will your children (all this affects them by the way) good luck
2007-01-17 04:48:56 · answer #2 · answered by mv 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Hi Confused. You need some counseling - better than what us Yayhoos on Yahoo can offer you. But from my late night couch - let me say this.. Your guilt over your daliances is helping to make you feel that the best you deserve is this lyin cheatin angry defensive person. You need to look closely at why your self esteem is so low and start to turn that around. Maybe underneath all the scum - your man is a gem. But if you are going to be in a relationship with him - you are going to have to raise your self-assuredness many notches because he will likely not change. In sum - the only person you can change is yourself. Do it for you and do it for your kids.
2007-01-17 04:41:51 · answer #3 · answered by HomeSweetSiliconValley 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Girl, first of all don't beg he wants to belittle you and that is what he has done and will continue to do. You are worthy person, he is just not worthy of you or your kids. When a man gets defensive its because you are right. and for him to laugh at you when you cry is just cruel (REALITY CHECK) Leave this man and don't look back the less you say the more he will hurt and if he doesn't respond to you leaving then he didn't deserve you move on I know easier said then done, But tell yourself (YOU ARE AS GOOD AS IT GETS)
2007-01-17 04:43:57 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel bad for you. You should divorce him. I'm sure there are other guys out there that would appreciate you. Think about the kids welfare, do they need to see the fighting and bad feelings, all it does is hurt them. Put your children first. You should have never given him a second chance. He does not love you.Find someone who does, who cares what he thinks, his opinion matters very little. Show him what I said then show him the door forever. He is not mature enough to handle an adult relationship.
2007-01-17 04:42:45 · answer #5 · answered by cheekydogg2 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
unfortunately the baby wont save your marriage...Your husband has pretty much already ruined your marriage...for your sake and the sake of your unborn child you need to get out...He does not respect you and is only getting mad at you because you keep catching him cheating on you...He only has that one incident to throw in your face to try to make you the bad person in this. He is yelling at you for bringing up the subject, and then laughs at you while you try to have an open honest communication with him...Communication has stopped, and that is no fault of your own. But unless both people put in the effort to save a marriage there is no marriage to save....Those women have no reason to lie to you, maybe if it were one woman, but not 10....Please end this marriage for your safety... If he wont leave...you need to leave...
2007-01-17 09:09:15 · answer #6 · answered by Roman Esteban Due April 12 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
GOD it sounds so crazy, how can you live with this man. What are you made of, leave him and live a peaceful life. How can you live with all this pressure in your head. Flush him and move on, he is not worth.
Come are world is full of good people and you will definitely get one of your choice. You tried you level best and if he still does want to improve, forget about him.
I know it is hard but think how much you are going to pull off from your self.
Girl take a step and leave him.
2007-01-17 04:49:19 · answer #7 · answered by Nick 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I know that there are two sides to every story but your husband sounds like a jackass. I dont normally say this but you should get rid of him. Anyone who ridicules you for trying to express yourself is not worth your time of day.
Plus your children will pick up on his attitude. They will think that this is an acceptable way to behave and it is most definitely not. Ask yourself this, if you have a daughter, would you like her to be treated this way? If you have a son, would you like to see him treat a woman this way?
2007-01-17 04:41:46 · answer #8 · answered by penny century 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey he is not good for you or your children.I know it will be hard but you and your kids will be better off without him.
I put up with crap for 7 years trying to make it work,spare yourself. Karma will bring you a good one don't lose hope.I finally found a great man when i least expected it
2007-01-17 04:40:36 · answer #9 · answered by karma 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i feel really bad that you have to go through all this, but i think it would be best for you and your children if you could find a place and a man that you can all be happy with and that will love you and only you for who you are. this is a decision that only you can make though... so think about you AND your childrens futures.
2007-01-17 04:41:32 · answer #10 · answered by baby 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a disaster. If you stay with this guy, you won't have any peace. Perhaps you should consider giving up the child for adoption. How sad. 10 women, but they're all liars? I don't think so.
2007-01-17 04:37:45 · answer #11 · answered by Katherine W 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋