this is just out curiousity, but how long have you been married? are you happy? what are important things to keep in mind throughout the relationship? and what sacrafices have/are you making/made to make each other happy or in general? Its alot of questions, i know...but lately its its hard for me to see the "good" in marriage- it seems like you start off being madly, truly in love...but then it fades....what are your thoughts/oppinions on this? thank you in advance.
2007-01-16 19:53:31 · 4 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Other - Society & Culture
I have been married for almost 11 years, but have been with my husband for 15 years all up. Yes all that luvy, mushy stuff fades after a few years but is replaced by a deeper kind of love that doesn't need all that stuff all the time. For me, marriage is like a garden - if you tend to it and pay it some attention it is beautiful, but negelect it and it becomes overgrown and ugly. The sacrifices I think you make tend to add to the relationship, because you know it goes both ways and it builds a deeper level of trust and understanding. I think that being able to be who you are and pursue the things that make you happy as an induvidual and not getting lost in a role you think you should be playing - ie either wife, mother, daughter, etc is really important to a good marriage too as is letting go of expectations and taking it as it comes. And the big hummer - forgiveness because no one is perfect and we all make mistakes sometimes.
2007-01-16 20:19:05 · answer #1 · answered by kfraserseeto 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been married for over 30 years. Yes, I am happy. There are times when we can't stand each other, but we both know this one very important truth.
The marriage comes first. Not him. Not I. The marriage.
For instance, if he does something that makes me mad, I have two choices. I can try to punish him, or I can forgive, talk it out, and seek to save the relationship, because the relationship is more important than my feelings. He does the same thing when I'm a jerk.
The marriage has to come first in your lives, or there will be trouble. If either of you make the mistake of putting something or someone before the marriage, see what is happening and change it.
Sometimes this isn't easy. But putting something or someone else ahead of your own needs is the only way it will work. In this day and age of everyone thinking they have certain "entitlements" , it is hard to keep the correct focus, but it can be done.
2007-01-16 20:06:39 · answer #2 · answered by nancy jo 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have been married for 28 years and yup all that mush fades after a while but love doesn't. We can go without holding hands for a while but at the end of the day we both know that we love each other more than our own lives and that is what is important. More and more memories build up that are as cement to bricks.
2007-01-16 19:59:57 · answer #3 · answered by MeanKitty 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I was married twice. One time for 11 yrs, once for 9. Now I'm living with someone & it's a lot better.We appreciate each other.
2007-01-16 19:58:44 · answer #4 · answered by shermynewstart 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋