My boyfriend just tried to commit suicide tonight. I thought everything was fine, we were talking of our futures together. He has an ex and has been battling over the house and stuff, so I know he has been under some tremedous stress, but we had a big talk this weekend. I just got done visiting him at the hospital, but I don't know what to say, or how to act. We have only been together a couole of months, but he said he loves me already. What do I do??????? So confused.....
2007-01-16 19:23:22 · 17 answers · asked by starfrog711 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Hi there !!!
Thank God he is in the hospital and alive !! I can only imagine how scared you must feel.
Be at ease sweetie, he will get therapy and all the medication he needs to get back up on his two feet. Don't begin to ask him a million and one questions, like why did he do it, why didn't he tell you, ect...He might not even know the answers right now. He may even have a chemical imbalance. He does need your support.That is what relationships are all about, even though you have been together for a couple of months only, if you love him, stand by his side. Give him the support he needs.
Many times we are so overwhelmed by the experiences we go through in life, sometimes the burden for some gets to hard to carry, and like I said before , a chemical imbalance will do the trick as well.
You should take this time to get to know him better. Do you know his family ? If you don't this would be a good time to develop a relationship with them. Let them know how you are there for him, but not only with words, but by your actions.
Be supportive to him, tell him how much you love him, and if he goes to group therapy be there if they allow you to be there. Just be yourself. I know you are confused, need not be honey, and it is ok to let him know how you feel, maybe not right away, but when the time is right.
His actions do not determine his love for you, he just may need to regain focus on what he has to do to get over this fall, this depression.
Remember we all react different to stress.
I would get him some good books to read while in the hospital. "You can heal your life" by Louise L. hay is wonderful. Hayhouse.com has a variety of books and authors.
May your boyfriend find peace deep within,
may you find serenity and the right words to speak to this soul in need
may God be the one to guide all those in the medical field helping your boyfriend in this time of need
Keep your head up high
Hug your boyfriend, let him know you are there for him.
Read the bible with him,
let him know ( if you really love him and are commited to this relationship) that you love him and will be here for him
Don't judge him, he will do this himself
I will pray for both of you
Love light and peace
2007-01-16 19:47:58 · answer #1 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say this but planning a future with a man that is in the middle of a bunch of divorce crap that has driven him to attempt suicide after two months is just not a good situation to put yourself in the middle of.
You can be there for him as a friend but he needs to get some therapy and work all of this out before he is ready for a future with anyone and you should be laying low until he is well and has all of his stuff taken care of.
Be a good friend but don't get involved in a serious relationship with this man, he is not ready for it.
2007-01-16 19:31:04 · answer #2 · answered by flappymcp 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well, just be yourself and show that you care for him too by being with him at the hospital, chatting with him, most important of all, be by his side, if you love him. He might be going through a tough time. Just try to understand him more and be patient with him. He is already stressed out. So let him have some time to think things over. Good luck.
2007-01-16 19:30:13 · answer #3 · answered by happy 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love him you stick with him 100%. Bring him some flowers next time you visit in the hospital. He needs someone right now. DO not abandon him, that may make him more depressed. Look up in the local yellow pages for a clinic that can treat his depression, make sure he gets medicated and try to find a councilor for him. Let him know that you will go with him to his meetings. Don't back down now. This is a test to see what sort of women you really are.
2007-01-16 19:30:04 · answer #4 · answered by I hate stupid ppl like you 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Be his "holding point". What I mean by that is, be at least one of his main reasons for wanting to stay alive! Obviously, if he has something to look forward to in the future, he's going to WANT to have that future. Just be supportive of him and sensitive to his feelings. He's probably under a ton of stress, help him get through the rough times.
2007-01-16 19:27:34 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
oh dear.help him through his problems.he might have a lot of stress but must help him face the reality every one in the world faces sterss n sucide is not the way to relief.tell him that if he loves u he can trust u n share his burden with u.u can be u truthful friend too.well as soon as he tells u hope everthing turns fine.give him the love more than he wishes.
2007-01-16 19:51:48 · answer #6 · answered by marwa 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, you're the rebound girl (not to say you can't be a forever girl, though). Second, you can't take this personally. You may be the only good thing in his life. It just may not be enough to prevent him from taking his life compared with the weight of all the other stuff he's going through.
2007-01-16 19:29:41 · answer #7 · answered by Craig B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the guy was trying to leave you without any notice and now claims to love you. ask him to get proffesional help though i recommend spiritual help and then you can discuss matters pertaining to love.i dont think he is stable enough to deal with the emotional stresses of a relationship in addition to what he is going through.
2007-01-16 19:35:52 · answer #8 · answered by kay1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont sound like hes stable enough for you to hang on to him.. if he did that with that break up what about if or when something happens to you... your only 2 months into the relationship so i would just go slower and be his friend and be very careful how much i wanted to get into him. its something to think about for sure.. past behavior is perdiction of future behavior. so keep eyes open and think with your head not your heart.. good luck.
2007-01-16 19:33:03 · answer #9 · answered by Kat 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do you love him?
It sounds like he has a lot of things to resolve in his life.
You could be in for a roller coaster ride of a relationship.
If it isn't love than I would say it's time to worry about your life and find happiness somewhere else.
2007-01-16 19:28:53 · answer #10 · answered by Rich 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋