I met this man. We had intense chemistry felt on both sides. He was arrogant and I couldn't take it. Although this man is an excellent catch and he was unexpectedly my "dream man."
I have always been a player and now this time I can't forget about him. I constantly think of him but we are no longer seeing each other as I dropped him because of his arrogance. He's moved on now, but some of his actions are suggesting he hasn't (long story). I can't stop thinking about him and know I need to forget about him. Please help as this man has caused so many disruptions in my life and I can't find a way to move on.
2007-01-16 19:18:31 · 4 answers · asked by bentley b 2 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Make a list of what you want. Organise this to your favorites. Then make a catch phrase like "Humble men rule". Say this 10 times everytime your brain wanders to him.
Find replacement for the time you spent with him. Sure a new guy is always desired ... but there are other things you can do like get a job ... volunteer ... spend more time on computer ... walk the dog ... exercise classes ... beverages with the girls ... it's mega important to find positive ways to fill your free time and stay busy.
2007-01-16 19:39:50 · answer #1 · answered by Giggly Giraffe 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sadly, my own experience on love is limited. However, I've heard more than enough stories like this to have a somewhat valid opinion, so take this with a grain of salt.
Chemistry is not the be-all end-all of relationships, and love is kind of a catch-all term when it comes to interpersonal relationships. What kind of love was it? Was it passionate, logically unsound yet somehow felt perfect anyway? Was it romantic (though your description of the situation suggests not)? Was it just lust, something often confused for 'soul mate' love?
What you need is some serious introspection. Think about what it is exactly about this guy that sets you off. Try and learn from this experience to find out what he had that you wanted and what he did that irked you away from him. If you can figure that out and take some of the mystery out of the relationship, it'll be easier to convince yourself to let go. Until you do, part of you will always wonder, "Maybe he really is the one! Do I really want to let him go?"
If you have trouble pinpointing the 'problem', then seeing a counselor of interpersonal relationships (or just a good ol' therapist) is an excellent avenue. Sometimes an objective, outside opinion reverberating your own words back at you can help us figure things out faster.
Most importantly, and it's as painful for me to say it as it is for you to hear it, but love is never perfect. Sometimes you meet the right guy but you just don't click, and sometimes you meet the wrong guy and hit it off immediately. On rare occasion, you may even meet the right guy, but either you or he isn't quite self-realized enough to make it work properly.
What you need to do is figure out what you really want. Do you really want to move on, or does part of you want to give the guy another shot? Figure that out, and the next step will be easier. Just give it some thought. Good luck.
2007-01-17 03:35:17 · answer #2 · answered by vfaulkon 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't make the same mistake, don't go back to him.
Do yourself a favor, simply forget him. It sounds like you will not be happy with him..-sigh- i have the same problem...
2007-01-17 03:33:58 · answer #3 · answered by belindaa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The only way to get over someone... is to get under someone new.
2007-01-17 03:26:48 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋