I have been with my High School Sweetheart for 6 years now. He cheated on me the second year we were together----the third year---- talked to another girl over the phone---talked to one of the girls he cheated on me before I left for the Navy---now today I just found out the girl that he cheated on me with the first year---he has kept in touch with since I got out of basic and txt messaged her a week ago telling her how his day was. I have just recently been honorably discharged from the service in December. He told me that since we have been here he has been really stressed out and that is his reason. I am so tired of dealing with all of this. We just recently made it through a porn addiction. I don't understand how I could be the issue. I am pretty---in shape--and smart. I will be attending Texas A&M in August. What should I do---should I get a divorce? How much does it cost to get one? How long? Where do I go? Plus-since I got out he has to take care of me until I can find a job.
2007-01-16 18:14:12 · 12 answers · asked by Raven 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I understand your frustrations and you do have some legitment reasons to file should you decide to. However, I would exhaust all efforts to try to save the relationship first. Obviously communicating and counseling are some options and maybe a trial separation to let him have some time to realize how is actions are destroying your relationship. He might take a good look at himself and realize the mess he has made and the tremendous loss he will take if he doesn't find a way to change his ways.
2007-01-16 18:55:41 · answer #1 · answered by gg55 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you just pissed off right now or have you thought this through. It sounds like you have already made up your mind. You seem to have alot on your plate and hubby isn't helping much.How are you going to do well in school if your worrying about your relationship. It's possible that now you are home things will get better. Being lonely can make you do stuff you wouldn't do normally. Try giving it some time to see if things improve. Good Luck
2007-01-16 18:26:42 · answer #2 · answered by noddy 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is not the place to ask if you should get a divorce. This is something you need to decide for yourself. First the two of you should get counselling either from the military, a marriage counselor or your church. Talk to each other. See if both of you want to make the effort to make the marriage work. Decide which way will make you happy and feel good about yourself.
Good luck.
2007-01-16 18:21:17 · answer #3 · answered by lilygateau 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I have been through all of that and then some with my marriage. Divorce is an easy solution and yes you can get alimony. But really think about it. Can you guys work through it if all the addictions and infidelity has stopped? If it has stopped I would recommend counseling, it helps. But before doing anything please make an effort and try to save your marriage. Sometimes it just wont work but you have to at least try, the both of you.
2007-01-16 18:20:02 · answer #4 · answered by mypassions4life 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I take it you are upset if he keeps in touch, or corresponds with a past relationship...you might think about this, it was a close friend to him, and in times of trouble...where do you turn to, your friends. Now,I understand this hurts you, but answer this...why does he have to go somewhere else to talk...why isn't he talking to you. This is the big ? You "two" need to make the relationship where you can talk to each other, instead of going out side ...like your doing right NOW.
2007-01-16 18:29:28 · answer #5 · answered by 007 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell him you need a strong person by your side, and if he's going to stress out, he needs a stay at home girl. The truth is, he's not ready for the work invollved in having a relationship and will use any excuse to keep to the fun parts.
2007-01-16 18:20:57 · answer #6 · answered by nursesr4evr 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
This is NOT your fault. He's a cheat, sounds like he always has been and always will be. Yes, you need to leave him before he gives you a STD. Good luck
2007-01-16 18:28:54 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yeah, get a divorce but change your attitude immensely before you think about marrying a second time otherwise you'll drive that guy to be just like your first!
2007-01-16 18:23:50 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
sounds like he wants the single life back, and if you choose to give it to him, I would talk to a lawyer and see what your rights are and go from there. , good luck
2007-01-16 18:21:52 · answer #9 · answered by rkilburn410 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Leave him hon, it's not you. I know it will be hard, but your a woman, and we are strong. You will be so much happier in the long run.Be strong, and move on.
2007-01-16 18:20:11 · answer #10 · answered by proudmama 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋