For those who believe that homosexuality or bisexuality is a choice, what is your rationale?

Question

One doesn't even have to be morally opposed to sexualities other than heterosexuality to believe that sexual orientation is a conscious choice. . .
I see this belief in commentary that runs the gamut from "I will support her even if she chooses that lifestyle," to vitriolic rhetoric that claims homosexuality is a wicked choice whose practitioners are hellbound. I believe otherwise. Not that I believe there should even be a need to explain the "aetiology" of homosexuality - but the consensus amongst the scientific community seems to be that genetics, if not the mono-causal factor, is the dominant one. Going further, even if it ISN'T genetic, can you imagine someone choosing a sexual orientation the way we might choose kung pao over curry? I certainly cannot. If you can, please explain.

Before anyone accuses me of non-response to explanation,I have to point out that the "add details" function seems not to be working at the moment. If it is,I will be responsive to thoughtful dissent.

Girl with the Most Cake, you bring up an interesting phenomenon. The LUGS (Lesbians until graduation), as you put it, are maybe experimenting, or more likely complying with the male-dominated society's wish to objectify them sexually.
At any rate, yes indeed, a non-homosexual person can behave homosexually, just as the reverse is true -e.g.gay men married to women because of social pressure. There IS an underlying orientation, however, and THAT is what I contend is NOT a choice.

I want to clarify that I seek an explanation for the belief that it is a choice. I know that some of you think the orientation is a "sin," a concept I don't recognize. My rationale for believing it is NOT a choice is that when we realize that we are sexual beings, we consistently fantasize about or are attracted to one sex, the same or the other, or both sexes. The case of the bisexual (which is how I self-identify) is no different. It is not a choice. I never woke up one day and DECIDED to be attracted to both sexes. I also use the example of fetishes. Can you explain why you are a boob man, or a leg man, a foot man, or an *** man, etc.? The lack of explanation leads me to believe that there is no choice involved. The foot fetishist cannot erase his or her fetish. As for the contention that "everything in life is a choice," - not so. I did not choose to be average height, or to be predisposed to alcoholism. One is not automatically alcoholic because both parents were, but predisposed.

Robert, I CAN appreciate the sentiment in your final paragraph. Thank you for that.

Happy, I obviously agree with your conclusion, but what about the hormonal balance for a heterosexual person? Are you saying that the hormonal balances of heteros and bi's are basically the same?

Ignore the comment immediately above, it was written in dumb haste. Obviously hetero male would be mostly testosterone and hetero female would be mostly estrogen......I am interested in reading these studies thoroighly....

endpov, the irony, is amusing, you cite psychiatrists and health professionals
(would they in their majorities really agree with your effete argument?)
for the case that homosexuality is a conscious choice (a case far from convincing), then you tell me I DON'T listen/have the capacity to change my mind , etc.?

Answer 1

I think the choice part comes from choosing to act upon homosexual feelings....thats the only choice I see in the matter, I fully believe that there are some ppl that have a greater tendency towards homosexuality (i.e., feminine men or masculine women), its almost like you can see the physical characteristics that betray their biological gender.
Socially though within certain groups, its accepted to sleep with someone of the same gender and still be "straight". I see it a lot in younger crowds, like high school and college students, to the extent that some women/girls call themselves LUGS ( lesbian until graduation). There are a lot of things to choose about ourselves, its possible to choose orientation but very unlikely.

Answer 2

No, it does not make sense. Some people, today have started to accept homosexuality is natural and not going away. Bisexuality, on the other hand, is a totally different story with them. They can understand searching for a partner of a certain gender, but to not CARE what gender your partner is, is an idea they have trouble conceiving. I myself have been lectured by a grown woman over the "falsity" of my bi/pansexuality, and how I just bar-sexual, trying to get guys' attention by kissing girls. It is very angering and frustrating to have someone else try and tell you how you "actually' feel, when they don't even have a clue. All we can hope for is that since homosexuality if becoming more and more accepted, soon the other orientations/gender identities will too.

Answer 3

People can choose whatever they want, then their choice becomes their truth and their reality. It obviously doesn't matter if you agree with it or not, does it?

I had this great report typed out in support of my short answer above. Then I realized, the short answer is the summary of the entire report!!! So why become drawn into a debate where both sides have already decided the answers?

Well, I certainly am honored for you in your greatness, Bare Soled_, to have responded to my response. There must be something to what I say. And it wouldn't matter if the mentioned professionals agreed with the argument in majority, since deciding for themselves IS what most people do. Lots of people DO decide for themselves whatever they want out of life. If that decision is a lie in relation to who they really are is another story. Is that what you're really asking? It would appear that you are saying and implying that all those people who have made a decision (which you "certainly cannot imagine" making) are wrong, and further more, that it goes against your agenda. You said yourself that "you certainly cannot". Does that mean you cannot imagine someone choosing or that you yourself cannot choose. Or that everyone, like yourself, should choose both. To go further, it may be that you have indeed made a decision yourself, but you would certainly discourage or disagree with others making that decision, even though that decision may be right for them. And I'm not "telling you" anything, I'm simply observing the fact that you made the statement, "I certainly cannot". It sounds like you are contradicting yourself, not aware of your own statements, or, just not too sure of yourself. Perhaps a little anger management or sole searching is in order here, Bare Soled? And far be it from being an "effete" argument, it is a powerful observation on what most people do, and most people do decide for themselves. They are constantly in a decision making process. Sometimes they allow their natural inclinations to take precedence. Sometimes they consciously decide,"I am going to doing something about it." The decision making process can be as simple as that. Or as it appears in your case, it can be very complex. Accept it and move on to the next question.

In all honesty and aside from any bias you think I might have, perhaps by limiting yourself to a certain way of thinking, and preventing yourself from recognizing certain concepts, don't you think you also may prevent yourself from getting to the correct answer? And I don't mean the "correct answer" in the sense of what the majority appears to be doing. I mean the correct answer for the individual. The correct answer in relation to what the individual actually experiences. Like you said, you didn't just wake up one day and decide to be bisexual. There was a whole process involved. What would you do if you found out that the "underlying orientation" CAN be changed?

Answer 4

why would someone choose a lifestyle that can get them kicked out of the army, fired, lose friends, lose family love, lose self-respect, and ultimately get killed!

there has been genetic evidence since the 70's that it is genetic. homosexuality is caused by an imbalance of hormones.
gay: the man will have more estrogen (female hormone) than testosterone (male hormone).
lesbian: the woman will have more testosterone than estrogen
bisexual: the person will have an equal balance of both.

the "sin is a choice" is irrelevant because god created them to be gay. the "LUGs" is irrelevant because they are still expierimenting with their BORN SEXUAL ORIENTATION! that's what puberty is for.

go to http://www.godmademegay.com/ for more (scientific) info written by a baptist minister who did massive research.

Answer 5

It is a choice. Everything in your life is a choice.

Alcoholism is genetic? <---- According to American Modern Science

Both of my parents died form alcoholism & drugs at the age of 27 Dad & 25 Mom.

I'm 27 years old, hate the taste of alcohol drink maybe 3 times a year. <--- I suppose the genetic alcoholism does not apply to me in this case.

It might seem wrong to some people, it might seem ok to some people.

You need cynical proof for everything these days.

Weather you are gay, straight or whatever. It's the society that causes problems for these people. It's not a question of gay or straight people are still people.

Answer 6

They are blind and ignorant. I take that back. With all the scientific clinical data available, anyone that thinks it is a choice is not just ignorant, he is stupid. -- or words to that effect

added: Can you believe "funn" said God said it was a sin. The original text (Hebrew) was not condemning Homosexuality, it was condemning disharmony. -

Answer 7

I find it really maddening when people who have only ever been straight say things like that. Then they won't answer the obvious follow-up question, which is, "When did you choose?"

Answer 8

Who should I believe man or God?
God said sin.
A lover of self more then a lover of God.
Worship the creator more then the Creator.
Jesus is my salvation.<><

Answer 9

My rationale is that G-d would never make it IMPOSSIBLE for someone to please Him.

He still loves us in spite of wrong or right decisions!

Bless you
David T

Answer 10

sin is always a choice!