He's 13 months old and I have stayed home with him since birth. Now I have a part time job and he is going to daycare. I am so scared of all the bad things that could happen and I'm so sad to be leaving him with someone else. It kind of makes me sad because he's just growing up too fast:( How did any of you other mommies handle it? Did you cry the first time you dropped your baby off? I am afraid that I am going to cry buckets and I'll be embarassed. Any advice? Thanks!
2007-01-16 15:06:22 · 13 answers · asked by luvbabysky 3 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Newborn & Baby
Thank you all for your supportive answers!! It made me feel so much better!! I will try to be brave and not cry in front of him. The daycare is supposed to be a really good one and his "teacher" is actually our neighbor. We don't know her real well but she is really nice and very knowledgable and her 5 kids are all alive and healthy:) Thanks again for your answers...I wish I could choose them all as best answer:)
2007-01-17 01:38:22 · update #1
Don't be afraid or ashamed to cry. I remember when my daughter first went to daycare. She had her little backpack on and the teacher held her hand, and as she walked away she turned and waved saying "Bye, Mommy!" I cried all the way to work. But then she would tell me all that she learned and show me hr art work and I would hang it on the fridge (you'll run out of space REALLY fast) and within two days we both had made our peace with it.
It will be really difficult if he cries too, but you have to be strong for the both of you. The faster the drop off, the faster he'll get to playing with the other kids and start developing his social skills. It only hurts for a few minutes.
Take a deep breath and cut the umbilical cord. You have to let go some day. Its hard, but necessary. It makes for interesting stories and great pictures (graduations, little plays, show and tell days). If you're really bothered and the daycare is nearby, you can always drop in and sneak a peek when he's not looking.
2007-01-16 15:17:56 · answer #1 · answered by tiger_lilly33186 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I put my daughter in daycare for the first time when she was 2 1/2 and it was extremely hard for both of us. To make matters worse, I was only working a few classes away in the same daycare but the fact that someone else would be there when she needed help hurt me. Not all day cares are bad. Be sure you get to know the teachers very very well, cry it should not be embarrasing, it is your baby and it is hard. Hopefully the daycare you chose is very understanding, they should be, call as often as you need to to check on your baby, it is not bugging them,it is your job as a mommy to feel safe and secure where your baby is at. Make sure the daycare you choose is has an open door policy so you can go meet the teachers and sit in with them with your child so you can be more comfy with the idea of leaving your child and they won't seem like strangers. Do it a couple of times if you need to. Good luck
2007-01-16 23:23:19 · answer #2 · answered by 'lil peanut 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I worked for a daycare and had many mother crying buckets dropping their babies off for the first time, and most of those babies were 6 weeks-2 months old!! You won't be the first and you're certainly not the last. And honestly, if you didn't cry or seem upset when you dropped him off, I would be more concerned. You had 13 months with him...you know his ever sounds, mood, want, need, etc. It's not going to be easy...but you'll both make it...and if it doesn't seem to be working out for you after a few weeks, you can always go back to being a stay at home mom!
I've been a stay at home mom for years and the first time I took my oldest to preschool I cried and again at Kindergarten. And when I dropped my youngest off at preschool I cried and I know I'll cry like a baby when I take her to kindergarten in August.
Good luck tomorrow!! You might not be productive tomorrow at all, but you'll get through it. ;) Take Care!!!
2007-01-16 23:23:17 · answer #3 · answered by farmersdaughter 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hi.i am a stay at home mom of two. the first time i gave my son to daycare, i did not cry but i was terrified. but as soon as i left, the teachers were really sweet and caring. i made some early visits to the daycare before enrolling my child. i also talked to all the mothers who gave there children there and they said that this one was the best. i also made some background checks by asking around .and only herd the best. i suggest you do the same. enroll your chld to a daycare which your relatives or close friends suggest.
as for the first day,be very strong. your son is going to cry naturally so be strong. you can hang for ten minutes or so, but then go away. also bring a gift for him when you pick him up. then he would be eager to go to day care the next day.good luck on the new job
2007-01-16 23:28:02 · answer #4 · answered by atahsina 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Oh I feel so, so sorry for you - 'cause I know just how hard it is... My little girl went to kindergarten for the first time last year (she's turning 4 next week) and she was also at home since birth. It was absolutely nerve-wrecking! It's awful to think that 'someone else will have to take care of our precious little children. I can't tell you anything to make it easier, but I can suggest that you make the goodbye as fast as possible (it'll make it easier for him), walk to your car and have a huge cry. Don't feel embarassed about it - remember that the daycare staff sees moms & dads cry each time a new child is taken there. And when you're at work, call the daycare centre to check on him - they won't make anything of it & you'll have a bit of piece of mind. Good luck girl - I sometimes think that it's harder on us than on them.
2007-01-16 23:33:06 · answer #5 · answered by Gixy123 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't know any advice to tell you to make you not cry but, try not to feel embarrased if you do. My daughter never went to daycare or anything. When she was 4 she started headstart. I bawled my eyes out. I tried to be strong, but I just couldn't help it. The other parents were very supportive though. They told me it would be alright, and they seemed to understand. It's natural to be sad when you are leaving your babies in the care of someone else for the first time. Just remind yourself that he will be in good hands. It will get easier after the first time. Good luck!
2007-01-16 23:55:00 · answer #6 · answered by mommyof2 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I was really sad the first day. My husband came with me and we made sure that we were there less than 5 minutes. After that, you can stay longer and longer as you drop off but the first day-- in and out fast. It helped. By the second week, I realized that the people who work in these centers really love babies and they loved mine. She was happy and healthy there and has been thriving for over a year in daycare (she loves kids and playing and has so much fun when she goes).
2007-01-16 23:21:46 · answer #7 · answered by smartygirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes it is hard to leave them for the first time. As the above answers say, try to be HAPPY in front of your son, so that he will be happy as well. If he senses your stress, he will also be stressed. Once you get used to it, you will start to enjoy your work "adult" time. The best advice is to make sure it is a daycare that you trust. Maybe go a day before you start work, and spend a couple of hours or a day there with your son, so that you can see daily activities, (as well as him). This may make you more comfortable with the whole situation.
2007-01-16 23:17:40 · answer #8 · answered by memyselfandI 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You will not cry buckets because if you cry he will be afraid. You don't want to make this hard for him. The anxiety of separation will be hard enough on him. You have to act happy so that he will feel that this new thing is a good thing. Now, as a mom I have to admit that dropping my youngest at day care was hard for me too. But I was a big girl. My son was only 3 and he was not a big boy...he cried and kicked and screamed and it broke my heart. The first week was hard on all of us. But one day, just out of the blue, my son who had only been in day care for 2 weeks said to me..." mom! I'll walk by myself, I'm a big boy!" So I walked a few steps behind him and watched my baby stride into the building as if he owned the place! Then I cried buckets.
2007-01-16 23:16:47 · answer #9 · answered by Adrienne C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
1. is this a daycare you can trust & comfortable with?
whatever you do, do not cry in front of the child @ the daycare you will never leave then. the dear child will not begin to get used to being with others if you're not strong. ( i know its hard but try as hard as you can, o.k?
2. after daycare there will be headstart.(i had a very difficult time when my last child went to school for 1st time)
2007-01-16 23:13:07 · answer #10 · answered by audrey_halley2004 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋