Here's one.....you are in a book store and you bump into someone that takes your breath away. Can you write...

Question

an amusing paragraph or 2 or more that includes these movie quotes??
1. Ehhhh. I'm sorry. I need the judges ruling on this.
2. If... if it's true, my life just got made.
3. I know, you're probably one of those cheerful people who dot their "i's" with little hearts.
4. Is one of us supposed to be a DOG in this scenario?
5. Well, she was cute,very smart,horny .....blah,blah,blah.
6. It was like... magic.

Answer 1

'Very interesting' I thought as I passed the Bookstore. The sign read 'Two for the Price of One' and as I had been thinking of reading Moby Dick again, I decided to enter.

The store was almost empty which surprised me. I checked the books and could not find the White Whale. 'Geeze' I was amazed and shocked at the same time. There she stood the other side of the counter, all dressed in white and the size of, well let me put it this way, if they ever make a newer version of Moby Dick, she will definitely get a part. As the whale.

She and another female were talking away and didn't appear to notice me. 'Excuse me Miss' I called. No answer. Another customer, a young lady who looked like butter wouldn't melt in her mouth, joined me and after a few moments she whispered to me with her hand over his mouth 'All you gotta do is whistle, and you know how to whistle, don't ya, baby?'. 'Here I'll do it' she added, followed by a piercing whistle. Her voice and whistle belied her petite shape and size and well, she was cute, very smart, horny and well, I'll leave the rest to your imagination.

'May we have some service please Miss' I asked Miss Whale in a polite voice. Again she snarled back 'Oh, get you Mister, I think the butler is dead. My name is Yetta. I don't work Thursdays. It is Thursday isn't it?'. She turned her back and went back to her conversation. Without warning, a man came out from an office behind the counter and Miss Whale did a disappearing act. The other immediately came across and asked 'May I help you sir'. The change was phenomenal compared to what it had been literally minutes before. It was like.....magic.

The man returned to his office after a few moments looking around the shop. He seemed to be a frustrated little man with no friends. 'I am sorry Miss' I apologised 'but it was the young lady who just left the store who whistled. I hope I have not got you into bother with the manager'. 'Naw' she drawled 'that drives me crazy. If he sacks me and I think he might, it will be no loss'. 'In actual fact' she continued 'if....if it's true, my life just got made'. 'Again I apologise sincerely' I genuinely did not want any trouble 'I hope not'. She did not seem in the least distressed by the prospect.

'Naw' again she drawled 'he is a bit of a weirdo, so who cares. You see, his mother was a Roman Catholic, his father was an Orthodox Jew. They were separated two hours after the marriage. He was probably conceived while they were signing the register. Ha, ha, ha' she continued to laugh for a full minute or so. 'Right then' I asked 'Moby Dick, do you have it in stock'. I was surprised to see her bend down and produce a stock book from under the counter. 'Naw' she shook her head, 'they have it in the other store, two blocks away'. Now, I cannot stand that sort of thing. Out of stock. That drives me crazy! but then again, sounds like a short ride to me.
Miss Whale came across to us and with the look of a devil in her eyes snarled 'Who whistled, eh. Is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenario?'. With that she stomped out of the shop slamming the door behind her.

Without any further ado, the other young lady picked up the phone, called the other store and ordered the book for me. 'It will be here by cab in five or ten minutes sir' she now spoke with efficiency. The transition in her manner was a complete reversal of her previous behaviour. It was like...magic.

'You know sir' she spoke softly with a peculiar look on her face, 'but you are entitled to 'two for one'' she purred. 'Would you like me to help you choose from the romantic section'. 'I'm not really into romance' I told her in all honestly. 'Oh yeah' she whispered 'I bet........I know, you're probably one of those cheerful people who dot their 'i's' with little hearts'. Would you believe it, she actually took my hand and led me to the furthest corner of the shop where it was quite dim after she switched off the overhead light. 'Right' she said 'is one of us supposed to be a dog in this scenario'. I thought 'Where did I hear that before' but I was beginning to feel quite nervous as there were now several people in the shop being served by a young man who apeared from nowhere.

'Call me Marissa' she purred with her arms around my waist. I almost crapped myself. This is definitely not my scene. I was trying to figure a way out of the situation, when suddenly there was a scream from the counter area. It was a piercing scream and I knew from experience that it was not a mere paper cut that caused the person screaming to do so.

The male assistant was pointing to the managers office. I went in and saw the body on the floor. It was our half Catholic and half Orthodox Jew lying on the floor. I checked for signs of life, as he had all the appearances of death. No pulse, no heartbeat. I turned to the assistant 'If his condition does not change, this man is dead' I announced.

'Who could have done it' I asked. 'We had a man in here yesterday who created a fuss and wasn't very happy with the manager' stuttered the assistant. 'He said he would be back. I could smell something strange from his clothes. That's it, I remember now. He was possibly some deranged dry cleaner. That was the smell'.

'Ehhhh. I'm sorry. I need the judges ruling on this' I decided as again from experience, I knew that no jury would ever convict on the mere smell of dry cleaning. 'Call the police' I ordered the young lady 'and no-body touch anything until they arrive'. With that, a small fat man came through the street door 'Moby Dick' he called. 'That's me' I answered as I grabbed the first book I could find, put the ten dollars down on the counter, and quietly walked out of the store. I did not want to get involved with the police of that young lady.

As I walked away, I looked at the book I had taken by chance 'My God' I exclaimed aloud. There it was in bold print 'Murder she Wrote' ........................ 'Two for the price of One' I quietly thought to myself, I hope the other is not Miss Whale...........