My wife delivered our twins by c-section 6 weeks early. This was about 3.5 months ago. I know it is different for all women, but generally speaking, how long after the birth before she gets her sex drive back? Maybe I'm just not too impressive to her...I know she is not having an affair, because she is at home with the twins all day and we live at my parents house right now. I know to give her time...that when she is ready we will resume...but any ballpark figures on how long I need to wait?
2007-01-16 11:49:15 · 10 answers · asked by Guvo 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Twins and living with parents =no sex unless you have a place where you both can unwind and relax . She might be tired if the babies arent sleeping through the night. Im sure she loves you very much . Help her out with the twins on the weekend , then take her to a nice restaurant . Try for Valentines Day if the above doesnt work.
2007-01-16 11:57:25 · answer #1 · answered by sweetysource 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Twins?! AND a C-section? As a mother of three young children, two of whom were born C-section, there are many factors that play into the whole sex drive thing. First of all, it is different with everyone - especially when there are hormones involved! I had a huge drive with one of my kids, and an almost non-existant one with the others. Considering it was about 3.5 months ago, she's probably dealing with hormonal changes, possible body image issues (I was very self conscious of the c-section scar) and the fact that she's probably totally exhausted. New babies take a lot out of a mom (and dad), especially when there's two! It has NOTHING to do with you! She will need rest and lots of support from you. Also, you may want to consider pampering her - a foot rub here, a back rub there, etc. Tell her how beautiful she is and what a turn on it is to see her being such a good mom! Sometimes when we (women) get into a "lull" it takes a man to make us feel like a woman again! The more interest you show in her, the better chance she'll have of getting her groove back! Be sweet, attentive, patient and understanding - I can't give you a time frame, but she will come around! Congratulations, by the way!
2007-01-16 12:54:53 · answer #2 · answered by Beth 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ask her to talk to her doctor and make sure nothing else is going on. Get your parents to watch the twins or get a babysitter and give her time to go out and pamper herself at a day spa, hair salon, massage, etc. She probably doesn't feel like SHE is attractive anymore because of lingering baby fat..and yes she's probably still exhausted most of the time. Try doing more romantic things for her, tell her how absolutely she is the most beautiful woman in the world to you and how much you love her. Try giving her a massage with no expectations of sex....maybe she will get aroused! It is hard to get your sex drive back after having a baby for some women, especially after having your stomach cut open. You should get a babysitter at least once a week so she can have time to just be herself for a day and have a nice romantic date with you in the evening.
2007-01-16 11:54:59 · answer #3 · answered by StrawberryShortcake 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Until she is ready! Communicate with her about this issue.
Our chemistry changes while we are pregnant, from giving birth, post-partum, living with the in-laws is stressful and awkward.
If you are worried about post-partum depression being a factor, don't wait to explore this as a possibility. If she is on medication, the meds really affect libido. There may be a different combination of medications for her.
Discuss this with the doctor.
2007-01-16 12:14:01 · answer #4 · answered by Heather Rae 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well 6 weeks was long enough! She may be depressed shes living with your family has the babies all the time I would not want to have sex! take her out for a nice dinner and to a nice hotel let her get away from home then you should get lucky
2007-01-16 11:55:23 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
There are a lot of factors that you need to consider why shes like that for now. I had a c section and was breastfeeding for 8 months. So basically don't rush her for it, let her loosen up. We used to be in the same situation. We used to live with my inlaws which sort of killed my libido also. So move out, so she can feel confident about herself and you. Share the load when it comes to the kids and the house, go to the gym with her too (does wonders to your sexlife also).
2007-01-16 12:24:17 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
It may not be for over a year before she gets her drive back. If she is breastfeeding maybe longer. Having babies tears up the body.2 Wow.
2007-01-16 11:56:13 · answer #7 · answered by JAMI E 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
For me, it was the day I quit bleeding. Twins and in-laws is a lot of stress on it's own. I'm not sure I'd be getting it on either.
2007-01-16 11:53:41 · answer #8 · answered by Tasha 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
When the kids sleep thru the night every night.......
2007-01-16 11:55:39 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
give it some time.....
2007-01-16 11:53:04 · answer #10 · answered by dce1dg 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋