i have trouble saying no to people especaily my freinds what should i say?

Question

before saying no?

Answer 1

if your too afraid of coming off as a B****, dont worrry, its okay, peop0le can get used to hearing no once in awhile. dont let them take advantage of you

Answer 2

Hi New York, that's where I was born and raised.

Peer pressure is so tough--and it is very hard to say no to your friends. You need to think about YOU for a change, though. Think about your future, your plans, your goals--and what going along with the crowd might do to harm them.

Next time blame it on your parents (everybody else does--I know, I'm a parent). Say that you are grounded if you need to get out of something. You could say that your parents are all mad about your grades, and you need to be home studying more, or cleaning your room, doing chores, etc.

Answer 3

Just say no. Have you ever had someone tell you no? Did it kill you? That is my point. Don't make up fake excuses either cause they will try to find ways around it and you will end up cornered into something you don't want to do. Just say no and they they won't try to coerce you if they are your friend. If they do, just tell them no again, and say that is it, end of story, don't ask again because my mind is made up. If they are your friend they will understand and will get over it. If not, that is just one less needy person that you have nagging you. Disregard this, if it is a best friend asking, because that is what being a best friend is all about. You being their for them and them being their for you, weither it is something you you particularly want to do it or not.
Just make sure that that they would do the same for you!

Answer 4

Instead of saying "NO" there are alternatives:

- That won't work for me
- I'm not available then
- I have other plans at that time
- Y'all go ahead without me and have a good time
- I'm already committed then
- I would like to do it another time but not then

It's important not to reject the other person while declining to participate. Try to avoid explaining WHY - otherwise you will be persuaded to do something that you really don't want to do.
Avoid saying something like "I got a better offer".

Answer 5

It depends upon what they are asking but to try to give you a blank answer, if they want you to hang out and you don't want to, have something else in mind that you can say you want or need to do instead. if it is about money, tell them that you had to pay a bill so are broke. Remember if someone asks you for something they may not be a friend if you say no so you are better off without them!!

Answer 6

The questions is not necessarily what you should say, but the underlying problem of why you find it hard. People pleasing is usually the result of a belief that you need to prove yourself and a lack of belief that you are worthy to have those friends if you don't 'work' for them. I have always struggled with a need to feel 'useful' to others because, if I am no longer useful, then why would they want me around?
My advice is, discover what it is within you that drives you to say yes to everything and, I presume, no to yourself. Then, if they are really your friends, share with them what you have discovered and ask for their help and support to stop overextending yourself and start looking after yourself.

Answer 7

Not much. If you say no with a million and one excuses and reasons, you might as well say yes because you're putting waaay too much stress on yourself. No is an OK thing to tell people, otherwise you teach them to take advantage of you.

Answer 8

I have the same problem and at times I feel like my friends just come to me first before trying to work something else out first. It's hard to say, "no", to someone you care about and love to help but are times that enough is enough and the answer has to be NO. You just have to tell them, when you feel the need to say NO is, you care about them and you're not trying to be mean to them and you wish you could help but at this time it's something you just can't do! You know put it in your own words but something like that. I have two friends that come to me all the dare time and sometimes I think they wouldn't even call me if they didn't need me something. They seem to think I'm just sitting on my *** waiting for them to ask something of me. I have two teenagers, I can't do my own things I don't need anything else to do. I love them both very much, like sisters but I think they are too use to calling on me to help them out. I don't mind helping them most of the time but not all the time. Sometimes you just have to think of yourself.

Answer 9

i used to be this way but as time got on i started to get the guts to just say no but in a nice way, i just say i dont feel like it but maybe another day. I think that its best to give white lies for the mean time.

Answer 10

I'm sorry, can I get back to you on that?

And later if they still persist: It was a tough decision for me as I value you as a friend, but I really can't.

Or if all else fails, tell them you're not allowed (if your parents still control you) or that it's just not something you do.

Answer 11

If they ask you to do something or go somewhere say....let me think about it.

Then you can come back later and say I thought about it but this time I'll have to say no.

Practice in the mirror first.