Hi, my boyf got so upset over something really little the other day including my mate who is a boy, and a webpage, where I merely asked how he (my mate) was doing. This was in a non-flirtacious way. Upon seeing the message, he shoved me on to the floor and threw whatever he could at me. I thought he was being rediculas, so I started laughing. I couldnt help it.
Next thing he grabs my bags and shoves them out of his appartment door and grabs my hair and does the same to me. I was like what do I do.
It was only a stupid comment that was meant to be chatty. It wasnt intended to be flirty etc. So I grabbed my bags and drove to the supermarket, where he follwed me and we talked, and I stupidly ended up staying with him.
Is this abuse? Im really stressed due to university work at the moment, and I dont think I can cope with everything. I think it started to affect me becuase I think about it 24/7 and I think about the lack of self respect I have for myself...
Please help
2007-01-16 08:15:25 · 45 answers · asked by lozziebach 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
YES! That is abuse.
He physically abused and you should not stay with him.
From my own experience, I can tell you that it doesn't get better, it only gets worse. Please get out of this relationship before you end up getting badly hurt.
2007-01-16 08:20:30 · answer #1 · answered by Wendy 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey if you have to ask this question then I think you already know you were abused. If he laid a hand on you in any uninvited manor then it it considered abuse and if he is jealous that bad over you having a mate that you converse with then he is also mentally abusing you saying you cant have any male friends besides him. If you feel uneasy then get out asap. Don't make the mistake of staying until it gets worse. Good luck to you and I hope this helps you to realize what you are in for.
2007-01-16 08:21:49 · answer #2 · answered by crestland_chic 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Any physical abuse to you, which grabbing your hair and pushing you, yes is considered abuse.
If you were only joking with him, the best thing for him to do if he didn't agree would be to walk away. There is no excuse for physically pushing or hitting anyone. Sounds like someone who has a temper.
If you are under stress, it might be best to let this blow over, but stay away from these people.
Best of luck to you.
You don't have any problems, I'm sure you are a fine person, they have problems.
2007-01-16 08:19:33 · answer #3 · answered by Denny T 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
YES it is.
Trust me, get out of that relationship.
If you wait you will be stuck in a violance cycle which trust me is very hard to get out of.
I am pretty sure he will then tell you he's sorry, he'll probably give you flowers or something of that kind, then you're going to start feeling like it was your fault and not his that you provoked him to act that way, etc, then it will happen again, he might do the same or do something worse. Please leave. There are so many good guys out there. He's a punk.
2007-01-16 08:30:52 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
No self respecting man should lay hands on a woman. If he does it once the chances are high that he will do it again. Abuse is never ok even if it is a little bit. If you are going to stay with him then I would let him know that you will NEVER tolerate that kind of behaviour again and that if it does ever happen again that you are GONE!
2007-01-16 08:20:41 · answer #5 · answered by foxiegixxergurl2004 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Kick his ***, but before that break up with that possessive freak.
I know this seems a tad bit long, but PLEASE, it can be the difference between living and dying (mentally AND physically).
I was just joking about the kick-*** part, but I know a lot of girls on tv who merely thought their boyfriends were joking/being loving and end up having their throats slit (sorry for the disgustingness, but I'm sure you wouldn't want that to happen). This has happened to someone whom I love dearly, and now she has no self-esteem and is afraid of her mate (are you in this relationship to be afraid of him?). If he really loved you, he wouldn't have apologized, instead he would've never done it. Believe me, people can seem angelic and sweet and caring, but sometimes they're not what they seem like. If you keep letting him hurt you, he'll feel like he has power over you, like he's superior, then he'll treat you horrificly and you'll never be able to get out. Beautiful things can turn hideous, take my word. There is someone better for you because you seem like you're capable of so much (would you let your life become ruined over 'love'? Then that's not love at all, it's possession). You don't BELONG to him, he shouldn't treat you like a dog, he should treat you like the love of his life. If it feels even THE LEAST BIT wrong, break up. There are tons of loving and beautiful people out there for a beautiful person (mentally, because I don't know how you look) like you.
2007-01-16 08:19:13 · answer #6 · answered by FallOutGirl 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Yes, this is abuse. If you were flirting or not, your boyfriend has no right to physically hurt you. If this is only the beginning of things, it can only get worse from here. You should really end the relationship before he injures you physically and emotionally.
You're better than that, hunny! Good luck, stay strong!
2007-01-16 08:18:46 · answer #7 · answered by a. 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Yes of course it was abuse! You NEED to leave him like yesterday! If he got that upset and jealous over something so small, BELIEVE me honey, it will get a lot worse, and instead of throwing things at you, he will start hitting you! I can't believe you went back to him! You could press battering charges against him. Obviously you don't have any respect for your self or you would never put up with that. IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO GAIN SELF RESPECT! LEAVE HIS SORRY @SS!
2007-01-16 08:23:27 · answer #8 · answered by purpledragonflyjrh 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Um...it sounds a little like abuse but if you feel like you werent in any real SERIOUS danger then i guess its ok and it definetly helps that he talked to you about it. But pay close attention to his behavior, is this type of behavior he expressed something that always happens? If he acts this way on a regular basis then watch out for him because he could become abusive. Maybe he was just mad but a man is never supposed to put his hands on a woman in that type of way. As long as you feel safe with him and trust him then stay with him but if he starts trippin again then LEAVE or get help.
2007-01-16 08:23:13 · answer #9 · answered by Beautiful 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hello?! Sorry about being rude, but yes, he is being very abusive. If you stay with him, you are not going to be happy. He's one of those types who can't handle anything but total control. It's not just a little jealousy. If he loved you, he wouldn't hurt you like that and then make up for it afterwards. Please, for your own good, leave him and find someone better. Make sure he doesn't hunt you down or anything
2007-01-16 08:19:42 · answer #10 · answered by JZ 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Honey, you better get away while you can. Anyone that reacts like that to ANY situation, you can guarantee, will attempt to beat your @$$ one day. Trust me, I've been there, and if I would have paid attention to the signs, I would've saved myself A WHOLE LOT OF DRAMA!
2007-01-16 08:19:32 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋