im worrid about my daughter?

Question

my daughter is always out with her friends shes 15 shes has a serious boyfriend i think she might of had sex i found condoms in her room im not a nosey mum i give her privacy .. when i found them i wonderd could she be smoking and taken drugs would you trust her?

Answer 1

First off .. Don't listen to a darn word these people ( the ones bad mouthing you) tell you... Just because your 15 year old daughter may or may not being doing stuff that she shouldn't be or isn't ready to be doing.. doesn't mean you are a bad mother.. If you were a bad mother you wouldnt give two craps what she did. As to an answer to your ? . All you can do is talk to her and tell her how you feel about it, and listen to what she has to say about it. But in all honesty, she is prob. going to do what she wants anyways, bc that is how 15 year olds are. Just teach her whats right from wrong, and teach her how to be safe so she isnt a teenage mom... Hope this helps !

Answer 2

This suggestion is to tell her you'd like to discuss an ongoing concern of yours with her, and then proceed to read & discuss 1 or more of the following ...

Teen Pregnancy :
- Mothers Too Soon
- A Global Tragedy
- Facing the Challenges of Teen Motherhood
- Help and Protection for Young Ones
http://watchtower.org/library/g/2004/10/8/article_01.htm

What's Wrong With Premarital Sex?
- What Fornication Includes
- Serious Threats
- Learning Self-Control
http://watchtower.org/library/g/2004/7/22a/article_01.htm

You can print out 2 copies.. Also,

Notice the links to related articles next to the texts, as you might want to discuss one of those with her, too. You might decide not to tell her what you found, to let her come forward on her own, if & when she chooses. That doesn't mean you can't bring up the topics or set stricter limits, as these are Very Real ongoing concerns of all parents everywhere!

"As a ship’s captain seeks the advice of an experienced pilot,
young people should seek their parents’ guidance."

Youths---Let Your Parents Help You Guard Your Heart!
- Why Obey Your Parents?
- Attraction to the Opposite Sex
- The Persuasive Power of Your Peers
- Worthy of Honors
http://watchtower.org/library/w/2004/10/15/article_01.htm

(NOTE : These URLs will likely be modified soon. After that, 1 sub-title of each series can be entered in the Advanced Search engine at : http://watchtower.org/search/search_e.htm , which will give you a link to the new URLs.)

Answer 3

You are her parent, you should know what is going on in her life. Be nosey. It is your job. I would have to set some boundaries. What has been your position on premarital sex? Is protection something that you support or are you against premarital sex altogether? How good is your relationship with you daughter. I would find activities closer ot home to do with her. I would get to know the boyfriend and insist that they be at your house or the guy's house, if you can trust that the parents will provide supervision. Know who her friends are. fifteen is a bit young to have a serious boyfriend. I would try and enact some courting boundaries, but that might be too late since she is obviously having sex. There is no reason to assume that she is doing drugs, but the condoms in her room would be an alarm for me. No, it is not enough that she is protecting herself. Sex is a very emotional experience and fifteen is a bit young to be all wrapped up in adult behavior. Remember this is just my own opinion. She may rebell against these newly set boundaries. that is to be expected. But, if you don't set them, then she will continue to live her life as she sees fit and play "adult."

Answer 4

Why dont you...ask her? Just because you found condoms I wouldnt automatically assume drugs and cigarettes...Sit her down and have a talk with her.
Set some restrictions. She's 15 not 18. She's still just a kid no matter how old she thinks she is.
If shes having sex, it would be best to be aware of it, and help her get all the protection she can. If you're open with her, she'll be more willing to come to you and then you wouldnt neccessarily be playing a guessing game.

Answer 5

I am 26 and I remember when I was 15 my mom had the same worries. My mom talked to me about everything and I knew I could talk to her about anything. Be open and honest with your daughter and she will be open and honest with you. Try not to get angry or upset if she tells you something you dont want to hear. Make sure she knows that you are not going to jump down her throat if she is honest with you. Cause if she thinks she is going to get into trouble she will be less likely to tell you things honestly. If she is having sex ask her if she wants you to get her on the pill and be sure she knows the importance of condoms. If she is smoking try to speak to her about the effects of smoking. If she doesnt want to quit there is not to much you can do to stop her teens have a way of finding ways to get around thier parents. I did. I hope this helps.

Answer 6

She has a "serious" boyfriend at age 15?
That's a bit young.
I'm sure she has had sex if there are condoms in her room.
You should be nosy, you are her Mom and you're supposed to guide her through this time in her life. Sit her down and ask her if she has sex, smokes and takes drugs.
Put your foot down and don't allow her to be out with her friends all the time. Do you know exactly where she goes and what she does when she is out?
Do you know her boyfriend well? Encourage the both of them to do more at home so you can get to know the type of person he is and whether or not he is good for her.
Remember, you are the parent and what you say goes.

Answer 7

You could ask her, don't accuse her. Just let her know that you are there for her. If she is having sex, at least she's using condoms. Make sure she understands that you are not mad at her, but you just want to make sure that she's not doing anything that can harm her. Simply state..."Sweetie, I found some condoms in your room, I'm not upset, I would just like to know if you are having sex. I'm glad that you are using condoms, it makes me feel better that you are using protection" Yada Yada... If a teen feels like they are being accused of something, than she/he will just act up even more. they will feel hurt.. Just have an open mind.

Answer 8

Who runs the family unit you or her? I allow my daughter out with a few of her friends to go shopping but would never allow her to go out when and where she feels like, nor would I allow her alone with her boyfriend unless you feel she is mature enough & by mature I mean not feeling she should be having sex at this age. Isat down with my daughter and discussed with her all the pros & cons of body changing, periods, sex etc., peer group pressures. We were both honest & open & I was quite impressed with her when she said to me that the only time she would have sex is when she gets married. I told her that she may decide to change her mind but try not to before 18. She was adamant that she wouldn't do it because other girls her age who have done it look empty. By this I assume she means they have nothing left to offer. So, please sit down with your daughter & be honest with her & allow her to be & LISTEN don't jump down her throat if she is doing these things tell her you are dissappointed with her etc. & then try to be helpful. I wish you the best of luck

Answer 9

too young.
lock her in her room.

try to keep track of the little lady.
Out late? Parents really shouldn't let their 15 year olds out past, say 10:30 and that's only if you know where and who they are with (for SURE).

some kids are sneaky but they ain't always so smart so it's easy to catch em! ha ha!

Then you can ground them for 2 months! then they'll be really mad and might run away!

seriously, keep that girl home.

Answer 10

If she was my daughter I would trust her until I was given a reason not to. Talk to her, not just once, but get connected with her and make it so your "in on" what's going on in her life. Start by expressing your worry, not lecturing and hope she opens up when she sees you're not going to fly off the handle. Good luck!