Was in a beautiful live in relationship with my bf. My family and I loved him and he loved us all back for 3 yrs. I used to travel and buy gifts everytime I got back, sex was amazing and he was my emotional pillar. He is 9 yrs younger to me and since i had the money, i lent him coz his problems were mine. Sacrificed the time I spent with family and friends to be with him. And then it all came crashing down, when he said he wanted to break up. He was cheating on me. He broke my heart and left me 2 months back for a girl, lonely with no one to run to. My trust was broken when i got to know he was having sex with other women, while I was away on work. Hurt, I wanted the money back. He said he was leaving town and will return it when he returns. Truth is he never left. He lied to me,didnt apologize, just said "I owe you money which you will get". Even more hurt, I asked him for EVERYTHING I ever gave to him, back...and he is returning all gifts and money, but its him I love and want back.
2007-01-16 07:19:08 · 4 answers · asked by Fast C 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
I feel terribly used and abused right now, and I dont even know whether his love for me was real, although he says it was. He lied to me so many times and I dont know what to believe. I want to move on, but feel terrible at him just returning all the money and all the gifts i gave him till date, because he is hurt. He says dont call , coz I mentally disturb him. He says he is happy that at least he has his freedome. I gave him complete freedom too, but whats the point in staying friends and suffering like this as if I am obssessed with him. Its been easier on him coz he has somebody to go to, and I have no one...Cant tell my family coz they will get all worked up and my friends have all moved out of town....What do I do? I am in such a mess...
2007-01-16 07:23:11 · update #1
Sorry about it all, but you need to chalk this one up to experience and move on. He obviously wasn't really loving you, but loving your sex, money and things. Consider yourself blessed that all you physically lost was money. Be happy you didn't have a baby to raise by yourself.
Now for the next time, I think you might need to find out what true love really is and isn't. Read in the Bible, I Corinthians 13 "The Love Chapter" where it says love is patient and kind and seeks not its own way at the expense of others. Love isn't boastful or proud and always believes the positive. This love is such that it will gladly give its own life to save the life of another. This is the kind of love that has kept my wife and I married for over 28 years. To find it, I suggest that you find a Bible believing church and join the singles group there. Most people there will practice this kind of love and you just might find a guy who will love you this way for who you are and not just for your sex, money and things.
2007-01-16 07:31:58 · answer #1 · answered by Captain Cupcake 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he returns everything, fine but really, write it off. Everything. The gifts were given in the spirit of love and taken as something else. Maybe he did have feelings for you at one time, but the truth is it is over, by his choice. Go have a good time and try to put it behind you. I know it won't be easy, but he has cheated on you and lied to you. Let him go. Don't feel bad that he is hurting after what he has done. Wanting him back is a natural reaction, but I fear getting him back will only lead to more heartache for you. Take care of your own heart, because he obviously won't do it for you.
2007-01-16 15:32:04 · answer #2 · answered by kiera70 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Quit calling him, take back whatever he wants to give back, avoid contact, grieve and mourn if you need to, and just know that you WILL get over it. He is a liar and a cheat, and not worthy of your unconditional love. Eventually you will start to see more clearly through the haze of what you feel is love, and you will see him for what he is. That will make it a lot easier for you to move on and find someone who will treat you the way you deserve to be treated!
2007-01-16 15:27:08 · answer #3 · answered by Arzosin 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i would just make sure you get all your stuff back and then forget about him it sounds like you gave him too much no offense but he proberly left you because he wasn't used to having so much attention and been given gifts all the time maybe you just need to let go because if he dosent want you back your only going to hurt yourself trying to get him back.
just try something new for yourself get a new hair style and change your style and bag yourself a new fella and forget all about your ex boyfriend and just enjoy yourself and if you do get a new man be wise and think about what you do with your money and only get him presents on special occasions
good luck frm jayne
2007-01-16 15:56:22 · answer #4 · answered by xxadamisfitxx 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋