my husbands physical appearence seems to be the main hindrence of our unstable relation ship.he is very short ,divorcee,and 17 years older than me.he is now 47.we have no children.i avoided to have children because iam confusedof my relationship and not sure whether i could be able to adjust in it of i will divorce him.
we always remain apart for 1 to 2 years after severe quarrels.
now also iam living away from him since 2 years.
what should i do .iam afraid to take any decision .marriage mean every thing to me but the circumstances made me to take such steps.
he is also very nervous that he dont have any children,some times i also feel that if we had children the situation might be better than this .
can i go there but iam afraid that at this age my husband is not interested in children he says its seems awakward.
what shuold i do plz advice me guininely.
eagerly waiting for u r reply.
2007-01-16 03:09:48 · 17 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
WHY DON'T YOU TALK TO YOUR HUSBAND ABOUT THIS?
2007-01-16 19:17:54 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 5⤊ 0⤋
You obviously got married for the wrong reasons. You never loved this man so why are you staying in this loveless marriage. Do both of you a favor and set him free so he has some chance of finding happiness too!
Throwing away a 10 year marriage because "he's short" is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard. What's the real reason? He's served his purpose by getting you to the United States?
2007-01-16 03:17:27 · answer #2 · answered by Starla_C 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are marriage but you are not marriage. No marriage can survive being away for two years. It looks like you are marriage only for thee title of being marriage, but you have no husband by your side, neither he does have a wife by his side. You are afraid to take a decision............... What decision needs to be taken if you are already without him for two years.
It looks like the best thing is for the two of you go on separate ways. Give yourself a chance to find a new relationship where you will be comfortable of having children, you will have a husband everyday by your side, raising a child by your side and you will be attracted to your husband, and give him a chance to find another relationship where it will be fulfilling for him. Ten years is enough time to know if a relationship will work. After all these years you have not adjust yet, you will never adjust. Have a child right now to justify being marriage will make it worse.
2007-01-16 06:42:42 · answer #3 · answered by bbluckylove 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
In the first place, I would blame you for all this. Before marriage you very well must have known that he is short, a divorcee and 17 years elder to you. After knowing all this, why did you then agree for the marriage and now you find it an obstacle for good relationship. You are being mean to your husband. Truth always sounds bitter, but it is a fact. Ask yourself. Havent you used him for any reason.
2007-01-16 04:34:08 · answer #4 · answered by keentoknow 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
once you've been separated now for 2 years i'll't imagine the way you may want to sense divorce might want to be any diverse. 2 years of no longer being with him and also you nonetheless are not any further confident? You provide more effective than sufficient clarification why you should divorce. and what's this about toddlers? you do not stay with him for lengthy sessions of time and also you ask your self about having toddlers? below the finest of situation having toddlers is a existence replacing experience. even as there are one of those unmarried mothers and fathers who seem to make it there's no reason so that you may attempt this. From his facet.....he's 40 seven now. in case you probably did have a newborn he might want to be sixty 5 even as that kid might want to be 18. It now seems to me that you spot your husband as an previous guy...even tho that is not. you're 30 now and also you're starting up.....perchance for the first time....the age enormous difference. Ten years in the past it became no longer so glaring. yet in case you imagine he seems previous now in basic terms wait 10 more effective years. for sure some individuals seem good at sixty 5 yet others seem a lot older than they are. spoil up and loose both your self and your husband as a lot as stumble on a more effective perfect existence. You confident don't have one now.
2016-10-15 07:34:18 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me.... adding children to a bad marriage only makes things worse. Your marriage is in shambles. Right now you are staying married just for the sake of staying in a marriage. You have lived away from him for two years, so you know it is possible to live without him. What continues to cement you to this man?? If marriage truly means everything to you... and it should... you will exit this charade of a marriage and proceed to get on with your life. What you will discover is huge relief and your happiness will be attractive to another man. You are still young. Go and find your soulmate. This man is not your soulmate and never will be.
2007-01-16 03:23:32 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
the success of a marriage depends upon mutual understanding,but you said that you live apart that's why you could not clear your misunderstandings but physical appereance is also very important,
but still if you think that situation may be better and you are ready for it then forget all bad moments and remind all the golden moments when you first meet your husband talk freely for your husband about your decision if he wants to improve herself then i hope your marriage will be succesful
but don't go to any decision without thinking every pros and cons
BEST OF LUCK..
2007-01-16 03:24:10 · answer #7 · answered by simple 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dont worry that 10 years is over and having children now its not fair please go ahead if you feel that situations might bring this closer and give you good relationship
Get adjusted to him dont worry about his physical appearance see if he is good in heart because if you take a divorce now it will be very difficult for you to remarry . if you have a kid i think you will also forget about this and gives more concentration to your kid
2007-01-16 21:22:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
looking to your mail it seems things have reached to irreversible stage. Having kids at this stage will complicate the things further. Suggestions to grow separately.
2007-01-16 03:40:23 · answer #9 · answered by Friendly medic 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I recommend u divorcing him and take a new life afresh, it will be difficult for u and him to live happily, better get a new life!!! Don't ruin yourself, ok!! GOOD LUCK!!
2007-01-16 03:37:00 · answer #10 · answered by Neha A 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
madam ,first of all check that your husband is still able to generate a child or not. and than think to have a child.
2007-01-16 03:36:09 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋