we dated for 2 yrs but argued a lot.he mentioned marriage.i dumped him out of nowhere.5 months later,we tried to make it work again but break up.i force myself to see other guys,but can't stop thinking of my x.he moves on and starts a new relationship.after a month,he gets in a huge fight with her/tells me he's going to dump her/uses me for sex/next day changes his mind.this shook me bc he's not the type to cheat.she dumps him for other reasons.i later find out from the girl that they never had sex.during this,i meet a guy that's ok,but still not as great as my x.my x sees a new girl but spends way more time with me than her.she ended up going for her x anyway.2 weeks later,my x puts my pics on his dorm wall/wants to hold hands.we makeout.i still love him but am afraid.i tell him i only want 2 b friends with benefits.he confesses that he wants a relationship/says that he won't have sex with me otherwise.i hesitate/he is hurt/ignores me.later,i agree to give him another chance.
ADVICE?
2007-01-16 02:41:44 · 4 answers · asked by stelze 1 in Social Science ➔ Psychology
Just be friends. Find someone else that you can have the 'benefits' with.
2007-01-16 02:46:43 · answer #1 · answered by Jo 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on!!! What you are doing is like touching a hot stove and expecting different results. The reason you do this is because you lack acceptance and have some controll issues.. I am not trying to be hurtfull, but truthfull. You think you can change him, or yourself.. You are most likley a very driven person and if not yet will be very sucessful. Your barrier is not being able to admit defeat in this relationship.. You are determined to make it work yet it keeps falling apart.. Use this experience as a learning process. Stay away from this guy and I would also suggest staying out of serious relationships for a year or so, take time to get to know yourself.. Now I know we all have needs and there is no shame in buying a vibrator or having a one night stnad or two. Just be careful on that second part and I would depend more on the vibrator, they are more reliable...lol.. I have seen so many of my friends do this same thing. I went through it myself years back... Then I quit dating period. I was out to party and have a good time and the girls who shared my bed knew this.. This was a sort of utopia.... Then one day boom.. My wife walked into my life.. Again, we both thought it would be just some fun and the next thing you know I am dropping the L bomb on her.. We will be married 11 years this june... Good Luck and P.S. she still has her vibrator lol...
2007-01-16 10:50:28 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's like opening the refrigerator and taking out the milk, when you smell it you realize it's bad, so, you put it back and hope it's better tomorrow.
2007-01-16 10:49:53 · answer #3 · answered by sowhat 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You're being used. Do not give him another chance.
2007-01-16 10:45:44 · answer #4 · answered by MelBright 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋