PLEASE need your help!!?

Question

I've not confided in you lot before, but I really need your advice on what could be a crucial decision.

I've suspected for some time now that my wife has been cheating on me. The usual signs. The phone rings, but if I answer, the caller hangs up.

My wife has been going out with the girls a lot recently, although when I ask their names she always says,
"Just some friends from work. You don't know them."

I sometimes stay awake to look out for her cab coming home, but she always comes walking up the drive as I hear the sound of a car leaving around the corner, as if she has gotten out and walked the rest of the way to the house.

Why? Maybe she wasn't in a taxi at all?

I once picked up her mobile phone, just to see what time it was. This caused her to go completely berserk. She quickly
snatched the phone out of my hand and cursed me hysterically, screaming that I should never touch her personal property. She then accused me of trying to spy on her.

Anyway, I have never broached the subject with my wife. I think deep down, I just didn't want to know the truth, but last night she went out again and I decided to really check on her.

I decided I was going to park my car next to the garage and then hide behind it so I could get a good view of the street around the corner when she came home. It was at that moment, that’s when I saw a man walking off behind her as she came up the street.

I rushed back into the house through the back and ran into bed. She even asked why I had thrown down my slippers, like she knows I was in a rush back into the house?

HELP what should I do??

Chris

Answer 1

my opinion is your marriage is ruined and there is no trust to save it, but that is just my opinion look inside your self and find out what do you want what would make you happy, only you knows the answer ****

Answer 2

You should tell her what you saw and also tell her you have suspected for a while and that you feel like you really didn't want to know because you lovED her.
But before you do this confrontation thing search into yourself for what you want as a remedy to this considering all the options. Make an appointment for yourself with a marriage counselor and with a divorce attorney to learn your options.
If you are the vindictive type do everything you can to limit the time she spends with this man while you are going over your options. It sounds like you are the child caregiver when she is out and about, tell her it's your turn and go out even if it is to sit in a coffee shop for an hour or two.
The two of you are married and her going ballistic over the cell phone is certainly a giant clue she is hiding something. Check the bill.

Answer 3

It does sound like your wife is hiding things from you and is being unfaithful. Maybe it is time for you to sit down and tell her that you know and feel things are not right in your marriage.

Let her know how you are feeling inside and how her behavior has made you feel. Ask her to be honest with you so you can both move on with your life.

She owes you the truth and you deserve atleast that much in return. She may not admit to having a affair, and if she doesnt your going to have to decide if the relationship is worth keeping or not. Even if she does admit the truth, which i think you already know.

If you decide to try to work things out in your marriage seek out a good counselor or clergy/pastor. I would also put a end to her friends nite out, if she can go out with friends then you should also be included and if she really wants to work it out she will otherwise its time to walk away and regain a life again.

Answer 4

This always, makes me sick to the pit of my stomach, whenever I hear or read about Cheaters, male or female.
If she does not have the decency to tell you, why should you tell her. Its clear to all that she disrespects you. Do not go through her stuff you have enough evidence. Focus your mental, emotional, spritual and financial energy on something new. Did you forget there is a YOU. Selfish right, how selfish is she in this. Your curiosity may lead to intense anger, and who knows what that can lead to. Walk tall, walk proudly, you a man. This happened to me, I could not see the wood for the trees, You will walk in pain for a while, its your pain ,you will even have to let go of that later.
Its crystal clear she is already emotionally divorced from you. All that needs to happen is the physical and legal divorce. Beat her to that but be a man about it, do it with as much transaprency as possible, show character in this, NEVER WEAKNESS. If you want a divorce. Divorce is all out war, doesnt have to be that way but could result in it. Either you attack first or you keep retreating, keep putting out fires. Oh! then theres her mind games she will play to lull you into a false state of security. Best advice is to pray it through

Answer 5

I think you know whats going t happen here. You can confront her with everything but she will probably try to lie her way out of it and probably get extremely hostile like youve already said. This is no longer a marriage but a disaster waiting to happen. Besides youll probably get no where confronting her and even if she did tell you the truth,theres not a whole lot you can do about it anyway. It sounds like the time has come to just cut your losses and move on, hopefully someday to someone who will appreciate you for you. Good luck

Answer 6

These are sure signs of cheating. I think you should just confront her and IF she makes excuses or refuses to answer then you will surely know. IF you really want to be sure and are not afraid of what you might see, follow her one night when she says she is going out with the girls or have someone else do it. It's now your decision on whether to stay or not but I would get out of the relationship and let her go have her fun and you move on. Good Luck

Answer 7

Hey Chris, what are you talking about? Is she really your wife or another person's wife? Come on! Be a man!
First you need to talk with your wife, but with a strict face and strict rules. I don't know what kind of woman she is, but I don't think that she can be stronger than you. Is she really a can?
Well, then you need to go to the doctor to get some advice.
And I want to say that, just be strict with her, show your love and never and never let her go!

Answer 8

First of all I would not have gone through those measures of trying to find out what's going on. I would just come out and ask her because although you may not want to hear the truth you need to know for your own mental state. It's obvious to me that she is just by reading your statement. Her personal property? There's no such thing in a marriage. Let me give you some advice, "simplify your life...get rid of the destructive elements, be true to yourself, take care of yourself, no one completes you but you and don't be afraid it will get easier."

Answer 9

It sounds like she's doing wrong. All the signs are there. Maybe you should confront her. Ask her but dont be too confrontational. If this is a deal breaker for you, you guys need to discuss it. But, if you really cant handle the truth, dont ask. It's all very painful. Sorry about your situation. Hope things work out for you in the end

Answer 10

if u think ur wife is cheating u then u have the right to spy on her and get everything clear... at least u r not treating her badly because many husbands treat their wives badly when they have doubts... u have the right to make sure that all is going well in ur life... dont let her know u spy on her and get a caller id fixed with ur phone so that u get the number of the person calling and u can call back to know who it is... hope this helps u... gd luck...

Answer 11

Have a talk with her. It sounds suspicious to me. Woman cheat for a lot of reasons but it is usually never about the sex and more about the attention. You should try counceling if you want to make it work if she is willing to admit her mistake and assure you that she will stop. This is a hard thing to get through good luck.