i have been in a serious relationship for almost 5 years and have always loved him faithfully and with all my heart..But unfortunately,after researching via embassys etc, i can not marry him as there are so many problems to overcome which i can not resolve. he is under impression that we are getting married in march but i can not go through it and i dont know how to tell him.please reply with advice which will help me please, no silly replies bcos i really need help and cant handle it anymore.
2007-01-14 23:17:36 · 17 answers · asked by soft 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Rubbish. Where there is a wil there is a way.
Cant is a cop-out
2007-01-18 20:41:15 · answer #1 · answered by tillermantony 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Everything boils down to priorities! You need to decide what your priority is. Is it your love of a potential husband or is it your religion and culture! If you choose the man, then nothing is impossible,,only time consuming perhaps. He may have to go there to marry you and you may be seperated for a time due to some laws,,,but in the end, you will be together. It is possible! If you choose your religion and culture, then you need to be honest with him, the sooner the better! If your heart is good, then you don't need to worry about leaving your religion as that is where your religion is. In all recognized religions, a man and wife are a large part of religion. It is unity with a marriage and unity with GOD. In life we have to make decisions sometimes such as this, but the answer becomes easier when you look into your own heart and are honest with yourself. Where does your heart lie? Please choose, and then act upon it with a FULL heart, not a torn one!
2007-01-14 23:42:50 · answer #2 · answered by shaprice1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you have decided that there is no way you can go through with it, then be honest. Don't let him carry on thinking the happy day is imminent when you have no intention of marrying him.
Be as open and detailed as possible, and let him understand that its not because you don't love him. Maybe he can come up with a helpful solution to the problem. At least trust him enough to give him a chance to try and work it out.
2007-01-15 00:06:03 · answer #3 · answered by Tamzi 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
During your 5 years together, was this subject never discussed in conversations? For some people, it's very important to preserve their religious and cultural heritage through out their lives. If you can both agree to respect each others backgrounds after marriage, then there shouldn't be a problem in my opinion. Best wishes...
2007-01-15 00:01:14 · answer #4 · answered by Fragile Rock 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to him Hon. You owe him at least an explanation. Don't you think you have left this a bit near the wedding date?! A problem halved is a problem solved remember. Maybe this BIG mountain of differences CAN be resolved if you put your heads together.
I say, if you REALLY love each other, no barrier is too steep or too difficult. If you love him, give him the chance at least of trying to sort this out!
2007-01-14 23:27:25 · answer #5 · answered by dragonfly 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i recognize the way you experience. i'm so sorry. It hurts like no different discomfort i have ever experienced and that i have been switched over right into a chilly-hearted and recommend individual because of it. I not believe adult adult males can love and it has affected fantastically a lot all factors of my existence. Time will make your crying a lot less and a lot less notwithstanding it is going to keep on with you and impression your relationships continuously. the first a number of days is so difficult yet in simple terms save questioning about any individuals on your existence that love you. childrens? moms and dads? Siblings? help out of your relatives in this time is critical and that i recommend you get out of the living house and go visit them many times. If I hadn't had my 4 sisters, then i could not are transforming into via it. e mail me in case you want to vent or don't have any individual else to consult. in simple terms getting it out can make you experience extra ideal.
2016-11-23 19:24:37 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am so sorry-- is there no compromise and no solution at all here? 5 years is an awfully long time and you love each other so much--there must be some way to resovle this. I cannot tell you how let this man you love down gently-- it is going to devaste him terribly. I guess the only thing you can possibly do is just tell him what you said here--luck and blessings--I feel for you both dear.
2007-01-14 23:24:13 · answer #7 · answered by smeezleme 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you love someone so much and faithfully as you say, religion and culture should not come between you. Obviously he is not letting it stop him from loving you. I think you really need to reconsider because you could be passing up on the best thing in your life.
2007-01-14 23:23:01 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
you have to tell him..if this is how you REALLY feel...you are letting your head rule your heart....wise sometimes...mistakes on other occasions...will you spend the rest of your days thinking 'what if...'...it is down to you but i think you know what you have to do...and he will survive, as will you...march is close...do not play with this mans feelings...if the boot was on the other foot you would want him to be up front with you....good luck...x
2007-01-14 23:25:31 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if religion is going to tear my love apart i will quit all forms of religion and be with my girl, is religion something that controls u? religion is only a belief...know what u are believing in, dont be fooled...
2007-01-14 23:54:23 · answer #10 · answered by starapproximate 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋