Well okay my husband really wants no condom, and to make him happy i say yes, he told me he promise not to let his *juice* go in me and ill just take the morning after pill, but im scared i really want a condom im not ready to be a parent, i tell him that but when we are doing it he is always convinceing me to take off his condom and then i dont feel no passion no more pleasure i feel when he does it to me i feel worried scared that ill become pregnant and he gets mad bec he knows when i dont enjoy it what should i do help!?
2007-01-14 18:48:48 · 33 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
tell him how you feel. if he is any type of mate, he will then understand and change his actions
2007-01-14 18:52:08 · answer #1 · answered by satnlafsasurot@sbcglobal.net 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Okay, first let me correct some other answerers. Condoms are 97% effective against pregnancy and it says so right on the box and the morning after pill or Plan B does NOT increase your chances of infertility. Where do people come up with these things?
What you need to do is talk to your husband about your fears. Tell him that while you understand his desire not to use a condom (because really it does feel a lot better without a condom for both partners and ribbed condoms only help out on the female side of things!), you do not feel comfortable playing russian roulette with your fertility. Tell him that he must use a condom or you will not have sex with him until you find an altnerative method of birth control.
Have you considered going on 'the pill', the patch, the nuva ring or the shot? What about getting a interuterine device? Even a diaphram is better than 'pulling out'. I suggest that you schedule an appointment with your doctor to discuss your contraceptive options. Hormonal birth control is over 99% effective at preventing pregnancy and has a whole load of other awesome benefits too like having the ability to skip your periods and menstrate once every 3 or 4 months if you like and reduce your chances of uterine and ovarian cancer. Of course, if you don't like the idea of hormones there are other options. Please see your doctor and refuse condomless sex until then!
2007-01-14 19:02:00 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
This is very common among many women. A fear of parenting can extinguish any or all pleasure during intercourse. As a man I know that condoms take away about 70% of the pleasure for men. The best thing I can recommend is birth control pills.This seems to be the only common solution for the both of you. However, if birth control pills are not an option you can discuss other alternatives with your doctor. Condoms and Pills aren't the only things available. You will have to decide what best suits both of you. This way he can have his pleasure and you can have yours. Men don't understand how scary it can be for a woman to have unprotected sex. After all, the man isn't the one that will have to carry the child for 9 months. Your husband will also have to be more understanding with you. I recommend that you set him down and explain to him exactly how you feel and let him know how much you do care about his pleasure and maybe you can both come to a conclusion together on what would help both of you to be more satisfied. I really think a talk with him will help. I hope this helps you, and good luck.
2007-01-14 19:04:34 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
If you are that worried about falling pregnant,.................get a IUD put in, take the Pill, have the shot, or go on the patch.
you shouldnt just be relying on the condom at all.
why are you even putting yourself in this risky situation, if you're not ready for kids yet?????????????
you cant just continue to take the morning after pill as this is not good for you, and should only be used if uve had an accident with a condome or somthing like that.
get on a more permanent method of birth control.
2007-01-14 19:54:04 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Birth Control.
2007-01-14 18:52:16 · answer #5 · answered by melvinbenjamin 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion, your husband is disrespecting you by refusing to wear a condom. However, you have some control here, too- you could tell him you won't have sex with him unless he wears one. You should not feel forced to do something that causes you so much worry!
Condoms aren't the most reliable form of birth control. If you don't want to get pregnant, see your doctor and ask about other options like the Pill or an IUD. There are lots of effective birth control options out there. If money is an issue, you can go to Planned Parenthood and get free or low-cost services. Just please take care of yourself and don't let anyone tell you what is best for you. If sex is making you feel bad, something is wrong and you need to do something about it. I hope you can talk with your husband openly about this.
2007-01-14 19:05:35 · answer #6 · answered by Alida 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
you know what if he really really loves you, he should understand that you want to wear a condom in bed and that you are not ready to be a parent yet. you should really talk to him seriously and say that you find no pleasure in sex any more because of his unsafe ways. if he can't understand that, DON"T HAVE SEX. i know that sounds hard but you have to stick to your guns. DON'T LET HIM PRESURE YOU. do what you want, it's your body. What you are saying is that while he's about to ejaculate, before he does so, "he pulls out", THIS IS NOT SAFE! don't let him do that, you can get pregnant that way, if you dont have any protection. Did you know that 1 million sperm can exsist in a dot smaller than a pencil mark? that means if he leave's any dripplets in you before he pulls out, you could have his sperm in you which means you could get pregnant. try using birth control, and tell him that if he doesnt get "it" into a condom, then "it's" not getting in you. YOU ARE THE BOSS!!
2007-01-14 18:59:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
gf, you said u don't feel any passion or pleasure. How horrible and sad. Really some women will break up with a guy because of the stress. He knows exactly how you feel but still enjoys disrespecting you. "to make him happy" really most guys out there are only happy when they are pleasing you. Def not making someone elce unhappy. At least you could tell him how you feel, that's a big step because it's easier to run away. Why did you marry him if you don't want his baby? Imagine growing up with a mother who never wanted you and a dad who forced her.
2007-01-14 19:30:56 · answer #8 · answered by Tracy 2 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He needs to respect your wishes. Parenthood is THE direct result of not using a method of birth control. If you are not on th pill you are literally TRYING to conceive if he doesn't want a condom. I'm a guy and I know why he doesn;t want to were one. It is very easy to get lost in The moment and take unnecessary chances. but DON'T. My wife didn;t tell me that she went off birth control.... She became pregnant before I was ready to have a child (conceived one month after marriage) and I love my child to death but our relationship payed a huge toll for her indiscretion.
2007-01-14 18:56:45 · answer #9 · answered by Ranger 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I would suggest a birth control that you take on a regular basis or tell your husband to use a condom. but it seems u wanna make him happy so just use the pill.
2007-01-14 19:00:21 · answer #10 · answered by cowboysfan4lyfe 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
just tell him that you really do not feel comfortable not using a rubber. tell him your too scared and worried to think about the pleasure. Try it and he is your husband right? well then just dont give him any...haha untill he starts using a rubber. U should try to control the sexual relations because im sure he wants it more than u do...im a guy..i know.
2007-01-14 18:55:36 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋