I recently came out to my Mom and two Sisters, now My mom is threating to tell my dad that im Gay. If he knows he will kick me out. The only way she wont tell is if i change. I need help, i cant talk to anyone about these. Please help me
2007-01-14 18:15:29 · 17 answers · asked by who is the light of my life?? 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
I would be nice if you can give me your IM so i can talk more of the situation.
2007-01-14 18:25:20 · update #1
IM 17 In Febuary
2007-01-14 19:13:20 · update #2
Oh my god, that's terrible. Maybe you are wrong about your dad, or even if you're not, ask around with your friends (the one who accept you and whose parents do as well) and see if anyone has room in case that does happen. Do not try to change; a parent who dislikes their child for who they are does not deserve to be a parent. Just be prepared for what happens and make sure you have a place to go if you do get kicked out.
2007-01-14 18:20:35 · answer #1 · answered by guitarherofairy 3 · 4⤊ 0⤋
I am really sorry you have to deal with such anxieties. But if your dad kicks you out as you think he will, you can refuse to go. If he physically abuses you, you can immediately report him to the police and to child services and cause him NO END of trouble. You can threaten him with that and with the fact that your being gay will become public information, so maybe he had better cool it.
Maybe YOU think you would never do that, but I can assure you that the only way to protect yourself against brutality is by using the law, whether it is a brutal parent or some gay-basher you never met before.
As for your mom, if she can threaten you, then you can threaten her -- with the above information AND with the threat of not loving HER anymore. That street goes both ways, and if she is too mentally undeveloped to recognize this, then maybe you need to impress this on her mind...
Whatever happens, there is no turning back. YOU have to move forward, whether anyone else around you does so or not.
ALSO, and this is very important, remember that if you do get kicked out, there is a whole world full of LGBT people AND straight people who would gladly help you (but be careful, because there are many sick people who would use or hurt you). In the worst case, you will not be alone, though it might feel that way at first. Good luck.
2007-01-14 18:37:03 · answer #2 · answered by fall2005buseng 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tough situation. Legally your father cannot kick you out of the house until you're 18. And even then there has to be a good reason. If you're a very young teenager and you felt that although you risk losing a good relationship with your father, this is something that you must tell him. If you felt that strong about it, let your mother tell him. If your mother thought you were so wrong she would've kicked you out herself or already have told your father. You need her support.
By the way, i'm not gay, just concerned.
2007-01-15 05:40:05 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a crazy situation. The first thing I would say is never give into blackmail. If your mother is the sort of person who feels the need to blackmail you in order to try and get you to give into her way of thinking, then you need to stand up to her. I know it is hard and there are probably lots of factors I am not aware of. However you need to ask yourself one question 'Am I going to live my life, my way and be happy or live it my mothers way and be miserable?' Then once you have decided this you can go on to live your life the way you see fit and your mother will have to vome to terms with something that isn't as big a threat as she at first might be thinking. Good luck with this, but you have taken the first most important step by telling her. Now you have to carry it through!
2007-01-14 18:23:42 · answer #4 · answered by waggy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I'm slightly disturbed by your nickname. Try to feel better about yourself - it obviously took real courage to tell your mother. How are your sisters about this? Could they offer some support? Are you sure that your father would kick you out? I would say, get it out in the open; try to be confident and comfortable, but non-confrontational.
2007-01-15 04:14:13 · answer #5 · answered by Matt 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your dad can't legally kick you out at 17 years old.
AIM SN: sm0k1nki11s
2007-01-14 20:02:29 · answer #6 · answered by Charles Darwin 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she has no right to say anything to anyone. she isnt coping with the idea at all. you need to tell your dad before she does. youre half way there anyway, might as well go through with it. good luck mate.
2007-01-14 18:23:35 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
ooh... thats really a bad situation... I'm sorry you have intolorant parents... (sorry if you took offence to that)... I didn't come out to my parents, i was forced out by the suicide note I almost used, and they were fine with it, so I guess all the help I can give you is my support...
2007-01-14 18:47:12 · answer #8 · answered by Das Schnabeltier 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask your mother at least to talk to the folks at PFLAG. And if she won't, then you talk to them. They have been through the same thing she is going through. She thinks if she threatens you then you will change. It just doesn't work that way.
2007-01-14 18:28:11 · answer #9 · answered by San Diego Art Nut 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell your mom that, its not about liking guys or girls, its love. and if she doesnt accept that its not worth being there. thats why i want to move out ASAP because my parents wont accept me either.
2007-01-14 18:20:21 · answer #10 · answered by Confused 2 · 4⤊ 0⤋