when challenging the homosexuals about their lifestyle. is it considered homophobic?

Question

it seems that some homosexuals cant stand to be challenged on this, but some homosexuals have no problem challenging hetersexual society norms like marriage and adoption. so is it wrong to say that sometimes being in the closet is not a bad thing.

Answer 1

Wrong? No, its your opinion. That means that not everyone will agree with it of course.

As for marriage -- I agree with you -- let the heterosexuals have it, they've messed it up quite enough. My only concern on that score is freedom of religion. You see, one of the reasons for the Revolution, in which ancestors of mine fought -- was to establish freedom of religion in the new nation. Now, we are throwing that away, because contrary to what those on the Right would like you to think, this is not a battle between "people of faith" and "atheists" or some such -- this is a battle between two groups of people of faith, using the government to establish one sides views -- the EXACT THING that the anti-establishmentarian clause of the Constitution is there to prevent.

Of course no one should "make" those whose faiths oppose gay marriage perform such marriages, and no one ever would. So ministers from the Southern Baptists and Assemblies of God and Ultra-Orthodox Jews and Fundamentalist Muslims should never be asked to perform gay marriages, and certainly not forced to.

On the other hand, why should faith groups that support gay marriage -- such as the United Church of Christ, the Unitarian/Universalist Society, the North American Spiritualist Church, Reform Judaism, and the Correllian Tradition of Wicca -- all recognized faiths and 501c3s be barred from practicing their religious faith, which says it is ok to marry same sex couples?

The first group of faith groups is realistically using the government to prevent the second group of faith groups from practicing what they believe. The founders tried to prevent this, for the stability of the country. It doesn't matter that everyone "thinks" they are right and others are wrong -- it matters that we are plural as a society and the government should recognize everyone's ceremonies the same -- which means that gay marriages committed by churches and faith groups that believe in gay marriages, should be honored by the government regardless of what groups that don't like it say.

So, while I agree with you that marriage doesn't matter one way or another, I do not agree that it is "challenging heteroseual societal norms" for gays to seek marriage -- rather it is part of a recognizable theological dispute between faiths. It should be treated as such, and freedom of religion, as guaranteed in the Constitution should trump the rights of a set group of faiths, with a set assertion on the subject, from establishing their assertion as the law of the land.

Regards,

Reynolds Jones
http://www.rebuff.org
[e-mail]

Answer 2

Because when one person tells you they don't agree with a part of you that makes up a lot of who you are, is unchangeable, and is not your choice (regardless of what your pastor or some self proclaimed expert in the field may have told you) like your brown eyes or some other random and inconsequential thing that makes no difference in anyone's day to day lives except the homosexual's, you can become a little taken aback and think to yourself why is this person even voicing their opinion on something that has nothing to do with them, it is not as though I am dating this person's father or mother, depending on ones homosexual preference, the person who took the time out to disagree is labeled a homophobe a lot of the time because the inability to, "agree," with the persons, "lifestyle," is ridiculous and irrational, it is not something that needs your approval and in and of itself the disagreeing is a fear be it based on biblical or some other social basing, because those are the only things that stop many people from coming to terms with homosexuality, the social idea that homosexuality is something to be disagreed with, no one has anything to say about heterosexuality, when is the last time you've heard of a hetero bashing? Got one? I got 10 homo bashings to back it up, and they are all fueled by the idea that homosexuality is something to be disagreed with. If you don't fear it in some form then what is there to disagree with?

Answer 3

Boy, the very beginning of your question really depresses me. Do you really think you have the right to challenge any person about their lifestyle? As long as things are between consenting adults, it is not your business. There have been questions on here that have really irritated me because of their ridiculous content (ex: comparing homosexuality to being a pedophile), but the fact that you think it's ok to tell a person how they live is wrong, and also have the nerve to then question the fact that they are not ok with this has made me lose a little bit of faith in humanity as a whole. Seriously. People are not challenging societal norms (marriage, adoption), they are trying to be granted equal rights to these norms. I can't honestly say that I think marriage between same sex couples should be integrated into religion, I don't think it's fair to ask others to change their religion. But I'll tell you this, if I ever meet a girl who I want to spend my life with, I certainly hope I will be afforded all the benefits a hetero couple is entitled to (insurance, hospital visitation, etc). So, thanks for depressing me.

Answer 4

It's homophobic either way. Some of us just don't give a damn what you think though.

Furthermore, you're being homophobic to all homosexuals, whereas you really only can say that SOME "have no problem challenging hetersexual [sic] society norms".

Answer 5

there is a big difference between sexuality and gender perceptions..

sexuality is derived at birth. it is a natural process

society norms are man-made.. why should everyone have to agree with these man-made norms? who made them up in the first place??

if you think gays having kids is wrong, then i assume you must believe in the traditional family huh?? well, what about the 60% of traditional families that end in divorce???

i didn't get a traditional family. i got a messy divorce when i was 6. and i have many messy scars for this..

i would have rather been raised by two capable and comptent gay parents, than to be raised by a single parent in an environment where the parents were always at each other's throats..

people who challenge gays are not actually challening their lifestyle or sexuality.. they are challenging people who appear different from societal norms..

why don't we scrutinize left handed people any more? aren't we all supposed to be right handed? isn't that what society says???

we all got over that one.. my grandfather was left but they FORCED him to use his right hand in school. they would hit him with a stick if he tried to use his left! amazing huh??

i just hope society will learn to accept gays the same way they have learned to accept left handed people..

Answer 6

Hey now, heterosexuals do not have a monopoly on adoption and marriage. They are basic rights that should be allowed to everyone, not "heterosexual rights" that homosexuals are stealing. Second of all, we don't live a "lifestyle"; we live how we were born and just because some of us were born liking just the same gender or both doesn't mean people like you can challenge us on it. How would you like it if we tried to force you to marry a gay guy? You wouldn't like it now, would you? Now you see how we feel when you try to make a gay guy marry a girl or a lesbian marry a guy.

Answer 7

I, personally, would disagree with that. The thing is alot of the time 'homosexuals' are 'attacked' on issues tht normally would get taken for granted. For example, should homosexual relationships even be permitted in society and variations on the theme. Therefore when someone is regularly 'attacked' from every angle, sometimes they get a little defensive. Also, because of the nature of some people's attitudes 'homosexuals' feel the need to justify themselves.

Answer 8

Yes I think it is. Perhaps you should spend more time minding your own business instead of trying to control the actions of a particular group of people whose lifestyle you do not approve of.

And by the way, heterosexual marriage is not "normal" or natural. It was originally an idea created by men to arrange political and economic alliances and protect wealth.

Answer 9

I know tell me about it!Like when I challenged the Jews about being Jews.Or I challenged Mormons about being Mormons!Or I challenged the blacks about being black.Or I challenged the Atheists about being Atheists!

The problem is that everyone wants diversity and I want them all to be just like me and if they refuse then I will tell them how much they are bad and going to hell.If that doesn't work then I will try more drastic measures.

I am what is normal because what is normal is normal because it is what I think normal should be.I am you.


Life is a challenge.Why challenge others?Why not just challenge yourself?

Answer 10

There is no such thing as a 'gay lifestyle'. I am a gay man and I've had 4 sex partners in 3 years. You've had more sex than me in the past three years, I'll bet.

What 'lifestyle' are you referring to?

I'm not interested in sex at the moment. I'm focused on my career. And even if I had a threesome tomorrow, how does that effect the quality of YOUR life?