I;ve been married for 28 yrs. my husband suddenly has no interest in me! He gets text mess. from a girl, he wont let me see his phone any more. he is just far away from me. Just writing this i think i know my answer!!!!!!!
2007-01-14 10:05:55 · 15 answers · asked by lee m 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
yes you do know the answer. not a good one. but save yourself from pain and hurt, and move on. 28 yrs is a long long time, but he is cheating because he gets so defensive when you ask about it. trust me. i worked with fraud and deciept. if someone gets defensive right away, there is your answer. when someone has nothing to hide, they talk calmly and show everything. talk to a counseler to help help in your grief
2007-01-14 10:11:10 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
A friend of mine is going through this exact scenario. The text messages started and after seeing the phone bill and saw that they were texting 30-40 times per day, she knew it was more than a friend. My advice is to get a hold of that bill and question the text messages. Now, it's basically the husband's fault because he won't stop talking to her. And he would lock his phone so that she couldn't check it. You are supposed to be the only woman (besides his mother, children) that he is supposed to confide in. If you're asking this question you know it's already started and I would confront him with the phone bill. You're better than 2nd and noone should make you feel that way. Good luck
2007-01-14 10:21:18 · answer #2 · answered by ninainpa 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it happens, no matter how many years u have been with him. he is for sure cheating on u, and there is nothing u can do, no matter what u say. definitely not at all fair, but these home wreckers pursue them, make them feel special, boost their ego's, and know exactly what to do when it comes to getting them away from u. best to accept it, expect the worst, and file for divorce, because the longer u stay in it, the worse it will hurt u. sometimes we just have to learn, change and grow from a bad break, that we did n't cause or want. just show him your not going to put up with it, don't allow him to treat u like this. easier to move on than stay in a toxic relationship where u are no longer loved or wanted. even if u did get her number and confront her, what than? most of these home wreckers are there for the challenge, and will do whatever it takes to show they can get him away from u. why even be part of it, why fight something u can't win. judging by his behavior, he is protecting her, by not allowing u to get her number. so u can see where his priorities are.
2007-01-14 10:20:25 · answer #3 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is getting attention from someone else, and it's exciting to him. She's probably just using him. That's what they do. Take my advice. You're married for 28 years. Plan ahead. Take control of the finances. Put money away in case you need it in a hurry. What it all boils down to is this...if he walks out on you, he's not going to give a damn about how you're going to get along. You will have enough weighing on your mind without worrying about how you're going to pay the bills.
2007-01-14 10:31:31 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he increases your life insurance or starts buying cases of rat poisoning, then this is usually a pretty good chance. In seriousness, youre probably right. Hes not sure whats going on right now so hes holding off telling you. You dont want to bring it up in case youre wrong and dont want to start something. Itd probably be a pretty good time to start coming up with a Plan B just in case and so you wont be caught completely off guard. If it does happen sue his butt for everything you can legally get. Good luck
2007-01-14 10:18:46 · answer #5 · answered by Arthur W 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If he's cheating on you? Don't overreact. Start screaming and yelling at him and you lose him. I know it'll hurt... but the best thing to do is sit him down and TALK. don't scream,don't insult,don't get defensive and don't set HIM on the defense.
Ask him what made him cheat,when he tells you. You're his wife,his confidante. You aren't his mother,his punisher or his keeper. Remind him of that.
Most guys are like big kids. They view the world a lot different from women. Keep that in mind.
2007-01-14 10:27:43 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Of course you know the answer.... things wear out, simple. And things can be repaired too, thru counseling, books, resparking your romance,.... yada.... So you have to decide whether you wish to remain married to him, and try to repair your marriage, stay, and each of you remain under the same roof, or leave.... simple as that. And many couples just stay together, and go their own way socially..... we were never designed to live as long as we do, and few people lived long enough to even come close to being married 28 years, even 100 years ago....
2007-01-14 10:45:02 · answer #7 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yep--happened to me at 24 years.
Let him go, but take all the $$ you can---you deserve it!
For what it's worth, I am now MUCH happier, married to a FAR better man. I think that will happen to you, too.....
God bless, hon.......and don't ever give up!
2007-01-14 10:23:34 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Remember one of you is worrying right now and it's not him. This may sound cold, but perhaps if you weren't so available for him....he may re-interest himself in you.
Good Luck and Blessings.
2007-01-14 10:10:58 · answer #9 · answered by Wood Smoke ~ Free2Bme! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait untill he gets in the shower then read his phone. This was going on with my mom and my step-dad.
2007-01-14 10:14:44 · answer #10 · answered by Katie S 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋