I've been with my boyfriend for two years, we live together and have an otherwise fantastic relationship - he's my best friend as well as my partner. The only issue is our sex life, which in the last 6 to 8 months has slowed down considerably. It's still pretty great, not quite as electrifying as before, but he's the best lover I've ever been with. All that said, we're now down to only having sex 1 or 2 times a week, and I find that's just not enough for me (I know this is common enough in other relationships, but you can only measure your own by your own standards, right?) I'd prefer it to be more like 5 or 6 times a week, if not more, but so often these days when I try to initiate sex my partner turns away, or falls asleep, or openly says he's not in the mood. We spend so much time together I'm pretty much sure he's not cheating. I find myself stealing opportunities to masturbate when he's not around and almost feel like I'm cheating. Help! How do I deal with this?
2007-01-14 06:07:24 · 17 answers · asked by worried chica 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
What you do is not ask personal, intimate questions like this on Yahoo Answers.
Do you really think decent people are interested in answering this kinds of sick questions???????????
Don't you realize that the sinful sexual behavior that is open and rampant in America is one of the key factors in bringing about her demise??????????
Check out your history of the great nations of the world down through time. There are 10 major factors that brought about their destruction. Immoral behavior is one of them.
You are helping to bring about America's destruction by your open, immoral behavior.
Have you no shame at all????????????
2007-01-14 06:21:11 · answer #1 · answered by delmaanna67 5 · 0⤊ 3⤋
First of all, masturbating is NOT cheating, it is a necessity if you have a guy that doesn't want to please you often! I have the same problem yet not so extreme. I want it almost everyday and my man, like once every 2-3 days. But your man has a problem if it is only 1-2 times a week! Does he work a lot? Cause that can wear a guy out. Or ask him why he doesn't want it often. I don't think that is normal at all! Maybe you can start trying new things to spice it up. Wear some lingere or get some toys. Put on a porno with him and try some things on the video. Tell him you are not satisfied any more and you want more sex. If he can't give it to you, then show him what it is like not having a need met. Stop cooking dinner for him or doing his laundry. Then maybe he will want to make you happy.
2007-01-14 06:15:22 · answer #2 · answered by L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried talking to him about it? And I don't mean 'hey wanna fool around?' 'No.' 'Okay I'll just take care of it myself.' I mean sit down and seriously tell him how you feel. You've been with him long enough that there shouldn't be anything you can't tell him. Maybe he's working a lot of hours and really is tired afterwards, or something like that.
The point is, talk to him, and straight up honestly tell him what you feel, that you want it more often, see what he wants. Maybe he has some secret desire that he wants to try but is afraid to ask you... donn't get upset or offended, whatever he may say, but listen to him and see what can be done to help things out.
Just the conversation might get him hot for you... most of us guys hear that our girl is masturbating and we get hard right on the spot lol.
At any rate, talk to him, be honest and ask for honesty in return, and TOGETHER both of you find a solution. (One thing I've found that works out very well is trade-offs. One night you get to choose what you want to do, the next time it's his turn. This gives both of you something to look forward to.)
Hope that helps! Good Luck!
2007-01-14 06:17:33 · answer #3 · answered by xadric 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You could try having sex with flare, like start giving him an erotic massage, eat food off eachother, role-play, do it in the shower, if you haven't done these already! But you can try new positions which can enrich the sexual drive more, you can buy a book or look some up online.
2007-01-14 06:12:18 · answer #4 · answered by pissedoffcupcake 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
lol me and my boyfriend were in combination just about three years and its like te complete reverse...hes the person who has the better intercourse force and is alawys starting up it. I consider you men will have to simply take a holiday from intercourse to allow him cool off and leave out it once more. And a different factor I've heard lol is that consuming alot of quantities of chocolate and oysters truthfully raises libido =]
2016-09-07 23:33:41 · answer #5 · answered by malboeuf 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm in the same situation.
what i do is ignore him and when he sees that my attention is somewhere else that is not him he comes looking for me.
just play on your computer or read or do anything but don't look at him or talk to him and if he asks something just give him a short answer (in a happy way) and go back to whatever your doing. if he comes near you or tries to start something make him wait until u want to not when he wants to.
2007-01-14 06:17:59 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
r u sure.... a guy turning down sex.... lieeeee.... ok i know ur not lying but maybe he turned gay.... ok ill stop joking.....
my best guess is... its getting boring.. spice it up.. buy some sex toys or watch porn and then do it.... change the pace... maturbate in front of him or by him or somewhere where he can hear you...... ur lucky to find ur love do whatever is necessary to keep him.
ohhh... maybe he was abducted by aliens and now hes one......hehe.. .^_^.
Sex is not the answer, sex is the question, yes is the answer.
2007-01-14 06:25:58 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well, being a guy I'd say you should really talk to him about it. There is definitely a problem here and you have to find out what it is. maybe something's stressing him at work, maybe he needs more excitement too! Communication is definitely the answer.
2007-01-14 06:20:40 · answer #8 · answered by courtman33 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
A guy turning down sex from his woman? Ummmm, is this true? Can it happen?
2007-01-14 06:10:40 · answer #9 · answered by wanderingphotographer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i guess u have hit that " neutral " stage he feels like he is comfortable with you enough and can get it whenever he wants so there is no rush in having sex because if he doesn't feel like it.. there is always tomorrow
2007-01-14 06:12:43 · answer #10 · answered by cutie 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋