my bf of 5yrs is all that and more.everyone tells me how lucky i am to have found him.he would give a stranger the shirt off his back if needed and is allways there to help a friend in need.but when it comes to me he could care less about my feelings and almost seems jealous of me when good things happen to me.he will say things like "figures, nothing good like that every happens to me".he was raised in a female dominate family and his ex was very controlling(still is) and liked to fight.i'm the not like that i tend to go along with anything just to keep peace.one would thing he would be grateful for me after been controlled by females all his life but hes not.the more someone is nasty,controlling to him the nicer he is to them like his exwife.if we have a disagreement(his ex and me)he will always side with his exwife even if he tells me he knows shes wrong(for his sons sake or so he says).i have tryed to push back but i feel he has gotten away with it for so long its to late now
2007-01-14 05:49:45 · 18 answers · asked by shannon8moore 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
HE DOES NOT LOVE YOU
2007-01-14 05:51:44 · answer #1 · answered by iroc 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't appreciate you at all! He also seems a little bit cocky, if he says YOU are lucky to have him...I had a boyfriend that told me that all the time too. It made me feel like crap, because he would never say how lucky HE is to have me, and it sounds like you are in the same situation. Think of the many girls who stay in abusive relationships and love their man: for some people the crappier you treat them the more they love you! Since you are nice to him he has never had to suffer or really fight for you, you came to him easily and that's why he doesn't appreciate you. People don't know what they have until they lose it....so I would suggest taking a little break from him for a while. Leave him and see how he will react...will he realize how lucky HE was to have you? If he does then he will go and fight for you to get you back...and if he doesn't realize this then let him remain with his own selfish conceited self. Good luck! And don't forget we all deserve to be appreciated, he shouldn't make you feel like you are a burden to him!
2007-01-14 05:59:16 · answer #2 · answered by Yul'ka 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I have the same situation. My Bf and I have been together for 3 1/2 years and he is very nice to everyone all the time, and when I ask him anything or to help me with something, he treats me like crap. Whenever something good happens to me he does the same thing. I think it is because he is insecure about himself, and he is not happy with something in his life that makes him that way. thats what people tell me. He probably is so used to his ex being that way to him that he has his certain walls up also. Good luck!!! He will not change either,
2007-01-14 05:59:43 · answer #3 · answered by Bandice 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
he might just feel that someone needs to be the dominant one in your relationship.. his ex-wife could also have an affect on his behaviour.. go find professional help if you are both willing, try and find out whats bugging him.. and talking to him can never hurt.. atleast he knows you care, and your making an attempt to make things work as best they can.. maybe he just has a grudge that he hasn't been able to let go of or find a healthy way to get rid of his grudge.. communication is VERY important.. best of luck
2007-01-14 05:57:15 · answer #4 · answered by l2onaldinho1010 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
THE Underlying Torrents of his Female Dominated SOUL, have led him to be kind to strangers and take is X-wife's side against you = BECAUSE HE has Not overcome his past experiences!
What you thought you got, IS NOT WHAT YOU GOT! [Yes, I know bad English = but it Makes the Point!]
He will Not Change, if nothing else, IT WILL GET WORSE! He cannot fight his X so he TREATS YOU LIKE CRAP!
Move on, and cut your Loses! He will Not Change!
Sorry for the Bad News! Sorry for the TRUTH!
Thanks, RR
2007-01-14 05:57:11 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He is so used to being controlled that is all he knows now. He probably thinks that is what a woman is supposed to do. You need to either tell this guy when to eat sleep and sh*t or get out of there. He sounds like he has a lot of baggage.
2007-01-14 05:54:22 · answer #6 · answered by L 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
maybe he is used to being treated like that and now that you are not treating him like that he is doing it to you because its part of his life is having the controlling people. or maybe he is trying to fight back now at everybody who has controlled him and he trys treating you that way.He probably is jealous of you. If he is going to be jealous of you then he will never see you two as equals..he will always think your better than him..because your luck is better and if your luck is better than you can find somebody better, dont let somebody treat you like crap becuase they will never stop and it will only get worse
2007-01-14 06:13:54 · answer #7 · answered by Heather S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to find you a new BF because this one could care less what you do and shows it to you. He doesn't really love you and after 5 years you need to walk, yesterday
2007-01-14 05:54:32 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
he really may not like women at all. he may not be comfortable with a female that is nice to him, if the other females in his life were controlling. i believe we teach people how to treat us, by allowing them to treat us badly and say nothing about it. u just aren't a priority with him and the others are.
2007-01-14 10:01:30 · answer #9 · answered by jude 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This has been going on for 5 years and you're just now thinking of doing something about it? If he treats you like crap, then he's not worth it....plain and simple.
2007-01-14 06:26:24 · answer #10 · answered by ksgirl 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it sounds to me like he is not familiar with the way you handle the relationship arguments and he's kind of scared!!! if he's anything like me he likes confrontation!!!! i grew up with a family that fought about everything even little stupid things, for what ever reason i still like to fight. my husband is the opposite, he is very passive and sometimes I'll pick at him just to start a fight so i fell better like i was back at home. i hope these helps you and if you don't like to argue maybe he's not the one for you!
2007-01-14 06:02:21 · answer #11 · answered by luckie9906 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋