My boyfriend never wants to speak about our problems. he thinks when he s not saying anything, than I will forget and everythings just fine. But it kills me inside. I just can relax when i talk about my problems.
He never wants to cuddle with me. When we are watching T.V. and I try to cuddle up he s like "I need my own space on the sofa" I want to watch the news.. " and so on
Then he goes to bed very early. but not for a good time in bed, cause once there, he wants to sleep. Whenever I want to have sex, he gets a bit annoyed. sometimes we have sex for about 4 minutes. than he turns over and sleeps.
Is this realtionship leading to a good future?
what do you think? what would you do?
Ps: whenever I try to talk about any of those things, he s telling me, that i m going on about things and that i should relax.
I dont know what to do. please give me some advice. thanks a lot
2007-01-14 05:08:15 · 26 answers · asked by andi m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
WELL he really needs to seek some personal counseling and i think you should consider leaving him for good. you don't need that **** and you know what? by the time, if you ever get married to him, your life is gonna be hell even if you love him. it'll get worse and worse and he'll never appreciate you in any way. this mommy's boy has got to grow up and get a life. you, on the other hand can do much better....i'm sure theres a lot of guys who are dying for their wives to give them sex, and here you are vise verse.....you deserve much better because you seem like you are intelligent. good luck!
2007-01-14 05:14:07 · answer #1 · answered by Butterfly 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
To be honest it sounds like he's hiding something from you, and is afraid you will ask about it while talkiing to him. Try to bring it out of him in an unguarded moment when youre not watching TV, and mention that his lacl of communication is worrying you.
Tell him you love him, reassurance is good at times like this, but tell him you really do need more tha 4 minutes and a snore. Try to make time rather than squeeze it in between wort telly and bed. Your intimacy is very important and it sounds like you are both sidelineing it, or at least one of you is.
Turn the Telly off, and talk.
Good luck. Really hope you can work it out, if not, there's hundreds of good books on the subject.
2007-01-14 13:15:38 · answer #2 · answered by mittobridges@btinternet.com 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have a similar problem my husband is a bad communicator, but he still wants sex 24/7 but i need my emotional needs filled to be able to want sex. I would say leave him as he is either no longer willing to make the effort to sort it out or he has some guilt thing going on xx
2007-01-14 14:38:50 · answer #3 · answered by sammyantha 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It doesn't look like a very happy relationship, whichever way you're looking at it, and your boyfriend is trying to kid himself.
No, it doesn't sound like it's a good start and doesn't seem to hold a lot for the future either.
He may want you there, not because he loves you, but because he's not strong enough to go and start a new one.
Sorry, I don't mean to upset you some more.
But, in parts, it does remind me of my past relationship with my ex husband.
There's still time to start afresh, and find someone who really loves you and cares about you.xxx
2007-01-14 13:33:53 · answer #4 · answered by Kc 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Girl I would dump him and throw his stuff out in black bags! Your not in a relationship. You are making all the effort, but it takes two to make a relationship work. I wouldnt put up with that. Give him an ultmatum, tell him its over if he doesnt wise up and act like a man. And if he doenst, stick to your guns and finish it, you deserve so much better than that.
2007-01-14 13:20:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
He does sound like a lot of men. In fact he sounds like my ex which is why he is now an ex. If you're not happy with the way things are, then you need to finish things. He won't change and you will end up resenting him even more.
2007-01-14 13:37:31 · answer #6 · answered by chelsea19622000 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think you know the answer to your question.
Ask yourself what are you getting from the relationship? Are your needs being met/fulfilled?
Reading your question, they are obviously not! So when you communicate your concerns to your boyfriend, is he interested? No, he isn't!
So in summary, you are in a relationship where there is very little love/affection, no sharing, & no communication when it comes to issues that need to be resolved.
So unless your boyfriend is willing to change, this relationship has no future.
2007-01-14 13:53:27 · answer #7 · answered by Kingbee 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
sounds like he could be depressed either that or i think there is definatly something up...is there anything thats happened in his life recently that could be resting on his mind?
there is the possibilty that hes not happy in the relationship but i personally think its something else
maybe you should give him the space he wants and dont talk about ur problems....he might just see how much he misses you then and does actually want your love and care
2007-01-14 14:30:41 · answer #8 · answered by make_a_wish995 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You have to decide if you want this type of relationship for the rest of your life.
The choice will always be yours. Remember it's your life and you desrve happiness.
Perhaps it's time to move on. There's a big world out there.
I wish you the very best of luck in any choices you make.
2007-01-14 13:25:12 · answer #9 · answered by Norman Bates 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sounds like you have already had some good advice.
"Throw him away and start anew"
I think he may have some serious problems, or perhaps he has other men/women preferences.
Whatever he is not interested in you so there is no point in trying to keep the relationship going.
Ask him to leave, or leave yourself.
Every one deserves more than that.
Good Luck in your new ventures.
2007-01-14 13:20:29 · answer #10 · answered by Jewel 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋