I don't love my husband any more because what he did to me is not understandable and too much. but we have been married for 7 years and every time i saw my daughter's face, i then gave up the idea for divorce. but I don't see it work for me cos i am really not happy in it. I am worried for losing her
2007-01-13 23:36:30 · 21 answers · asked by yiufdbgkhfjj 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I understand your situation from experience. I hate to see a couple get divorced especially when children are involved, however if you truly do not believe you love him anymore then you should get divorced. But, make sure you have all your ducks in a row before you leave. Be as emotionally, financially and intellectually prepared as you can be. One thing I know for certain is that when it comes to divorce, a child will forever be affected in some way.
If your husband's misdeed wasn't forgiveable i.e. he abused you or your daughter....LEAVE HIM.
Good luck and God Bless.
2007-01-13 23:45:11 · answer #1 · answered by Stryder 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Have you tried counseling? That is the first step- professional help. Depending on the severity of what he has done to you, it would be the best option. But to stay in a loveless marriage for the sake of your daughter is not an option- it will only harm her in the long run. Many divorces, even if they aren't on the most amicable terms, work out better for kids rather than the parents stay together- it could impart some serious psychological abuse on her part as she grows older. The thing to remember is to NEVER use your daughter as a go between or bribery object.
As for losing her, well, yes, there is always that possibility, but the courts try to decide things in the best interest of the child. If you know that you can't support her by yourself, again, put her best interest at heart. She will turn out fine as long as she knows that she has two parents that love her unconditionally, regardless if they are married or divorced.
2007-01-13 23:49:58 · answer #2 · answered by euphoriator 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
happiness...... hmm.... when i think about your question i feel what you feel, thinking about our own happiness or our children ? but, one thing i can suggest you is that rethink what is the foundation of your marriage, 7 years is not a short time to be forget, yet if from your husband really, really, not understandable and too much, talking is the best way, and if this turns out bad or didn't work well, divorce might be a solution, yet not a very good solution.
2007-01-13 23:46:31 · answer #3 · answered by OLGA 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
You didnt say what it was he did to you..... But I guess it must have been bad for you to not have feelings for him anymore. Dont stay just because you have been with him for 7years... Life is too short to be unhappy all the time. And if he has been violent or abusive you should not stay, and think of your daughter, how can she be happy if you are not. What do your friends think about your relationship? Is your husband aware you are unhappy? Try and talk to someone about it, there are also free womans legal services available (Aust) and the domestic violence hotline, go to your nearest family support centre to see what help and advice is available for you.... Best of Luck to you.
2007-01-13 23:55:51 · answer #4 · answered by Eve M 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
By staying a relationship that makes you unhappy will have a knock on effect to your daughter making her unhappy to its best to Divorce and try to remain on amicable terms with your ex husband so your daughter is not affected I know its not easy but sometimes you just have to bite yur lip for the sake of your daughter
2007-01-14 02:37:23 · answer #5 · answered by scottishmidget69 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Divorce is an UGLY thing. IF he is not abusive, and provides for you and the daughter, and is not running around on you, you can make it. Sit down with him without your daughter around and have a talk with him. Of course go into details with him as why you feel the way you do, and ask for an explanation for his actions.
2007-01-13 23:46:29 · answer #6 · answered by Ex Head 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't waste your life in a marriage that is unhappy, life is too short. If your not happy it will rub off on your daughter she will see it and it wont be a good environment to raise her anyways. Talk to your spouse, work out a custody agreement you can both live with. Good luck!
2007-01-14 05:41:17 · answer #7 · answered by chemky1 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I'm going to answer form a kids point of view who has been through the exact situation you described.
It was really hard, the first year or so, when my parents split up. i was angry at them, as were my siblings. But once the dust settled, once both parents settled into life as single parents in their own ways, things calmed down for me and my siblings too. I now feel it was the best choice they could have made, life with them living apart is much better, everyone is happier all round, compared to us all living together as a family. Obviously for young children it's hard, but in the long run it;s better for everyone.
2007-01-14 01:29:19 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, think of your daughter, nothing can be solved without talking and making it clear with each other. Even if you don't love each other, just stay together for the sake of your daughter. You can be friends by the way. And who knows as you go on, you'll feel that you still love each other..
Take care!
2007-01-13 23:41:59 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
you married for better or worse...
you have to keep your relationship alive, if you want to give up and so does he then you are just wasting his and your time. Your daughters future should be decided after you find where you stand. There is a solution but, you have to work at it.
2007-01-13 23:42:34 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋