2007-01-13 21:52:05 · 16 answers · asked by sweetie81 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
My husband used to give me a hard time when the children were under school age ( i had 2 eighteen months apart and neither of them slept)
he kept telling me I was abnormal, threatened to have affairs and generally made me so worried about it that I used to dread it. I worried so much about it that I was turned off completely. If I refused sex he would sulk for days . My self esteem was at rock bottom and in the end I used to fake it and hope it would be over and done with quickly.
Don't let this happen, be strong. explain why you are tired , you are normal.
Our long term relationship has suffered considerably because of this period in our marriage. when I did feel like sex again , I was afraid to let go , I didn't trust him with my feelings anymore.
Some men never really understand that a woman's body tells her she isn't ready for more children, and her libido reacts accordingly. If they are patient and understanding and are happy just to hold, hug and kiss for a while things do get back to normal.
Good Luck.
2007-01-14 01:15:49 · answer #1 · answered by ragdoll 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a brilliant, spot on answer from Private! I totally agree. If you are in general too tired for sex, then it is not wrong in itself but you can spend all your life being tired and then find your hubbie runs off with someone else. Men are rarely too tired for sex. So you have to sort your life out. Talk to your hubbie and discuss all your feelings - maybe he could help more and get the children to bed earlier or something, or maybe you could confide in a friend and get her to have the kids on a weekend afternoon so you can have intimacy, and then you do the same for her next time. You HAVE to work at this sort of thing, and realise that your sex life is very important. Your husband may love you, but if he is continually rejected in the sex dept. he will go looking for it elsewhere. And think about it, are you REALLY too tired for a quickie?
2007-01-13 22:04:58 · answer #2 · answered by Caroline 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
wrong?! you never make yourself have sex you will be hating it ! If you get enough help and time to chill out and rest, it will be back shortly otherwise you are in a long haul of tiredness and no desire. If your partnet is so bothered about it, explain it, and see if you can get some things done for you, a weekend away is not an easy thing to do if you have 2 children surelyl something can be done to give you at least a few hours off.
2007-01-13 22:00:40 · answer #3 · answered by shortnotsilly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Their is nothing wrong to be tired, but make sure that you have time for it at another time and let your partner knows about it . Sex is a very important aspect of any relationship, and neglecting it will create suspicions between u two and probably create lack of trust. Make moves towards your partner so that he or she knows that you cared, because if he wants u and all the time ur reply is i am tired he might feel rejected and unsecure.
2007-01-14 04:07:15 · answer #4 · answered by baba 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No its not wrong its perfectly normal. Loads of people are usually too tired for it due to all their commitments etc and just want to fall into bed and go straight to sleep. You could try getting someone to mind the kids for a night and relax with your partner with no stresses maybe have a nice meal and a romantic bath together with some nice oils and candles, few glasses of wine to relax and take it from there and things will just happen naturally.
2007-01-13 23:04:37 · answer #5 · answered by its_beautiful_me 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is totally understandable to be too tired at night. But, you could wake your partner in the morning for a nice session of love making before the two of you get on with your day. What a way to put a smile on your partner's face and keep it there all day.
2007-01-13 22:43:53 · answer #6 · answered by Rhoe 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No it's not wrong we all get tired. However if you are always tired it is going to put a real strain on your relationship. You need to take time out together. Maybe a relative could have the kids one weekend then you can relax together and have some fun? Good luck.
2007-01-13 21:57:58 · answer #7 · answered by Rachel H 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Prioritise.
Sex is an essential aspect of your relationship.
It doesnt matter if you have a good reason for being too tired if the upshot is that you dont do it.
Find a way to do it.Make it happen.It could even be considered irresponsible to have children then put the family enviroment at risk by refusing your partner.
2007-01-13 21:57:59 · answer #8 · answered by ? 3 · 2⤊ 2⤋
Not really,you can get tired, however if the feeling of not wanting to, is constant (that's not natural), have a word with your GP
2007-01-13 22:02:33 · answer #9 · answered by Branded 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
it is never wrong to be tired....you cannot function as a mother or at work if you are overtired....so try a different time....the variety will add some excitement too....just don't let the kids catch ya...x
2007-01-13 21:59:33 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋