Ok, here goes...I'm a lesbian and I've known for ages, and my best friend is gay, but the other night we were at his house watching a movie and, well, I don't know what happened but we ended up holding hands and kissing and stuff...It felt really good and it felt right, but I know that I'm not sexually attracted to guys and for him it has always been guys, he's never been attracted to a girl. While we were lying there it was perfect and I never wanted it to end...and when we were talking about it afterwards, I found out he felt the same way. So now we are both confused...we feel like we're in love, but we just can't figure out how that could have happened...Has anyone else ever experienced anything like this?
2007-01-13 18:10:30 · 15 answers · asked by rosy p 2 in Society & Culture ➔ Cultures & Groups ➔ Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual, and Transgender
To Jeff,
We have been best friends for years and have only gotten closer and closer. We know everything there is to know about eachother!!
2007-01-13 18:25:47 · update #1
It's rare, but it happens. I know lesbians who have fallen in love with men, and gay men who have fallen in love with women (Tom Robinson is actually quite famous for this). They aren't bisexual, they definitely aren't straight, but love, being gender-blind, takes its toll, and while they remain unattracted to the opposite sex and completely in love with the same sex, they are able to be emotionally and sexually satisfied with the one person they love.
I don't know if this is the case with you; for all I know, you might both be blossoming bisexuals, or just really confused. You know your feelings better than I do. Just know that you aren't necessarily straight or bi because of the attraction.
In some places, there's a 'new wave' of queer behavior going on, the sort of stuff that Carol Queen would write about- lesbians having sex with gay men (and calling it gay sex because it's between homosexuals) and all other sorts of gender-bending and twisted sexual attraction that has less to do with genitals and more to do with masculinity/femininity, tops/bottoms, dominantion/submission, and love.
In the end, it's happened, and it sounds like things are good between you if you let go of the doubts about what this means, and just enjoy it. Good luck to you both.
2007-01-13 19:59:18 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Close friends and confidantes know each other well, there is a connection that transcends sex. It is comfort. It is knowing this person is there for you, trusts you, likes you for being you. It is unlikely that this will become a full committed relationship but what does it matter? Enjoy it, let it flow, life is short and the pleasure we allow ourselves shouldn't be labeled or stereotyped. As long as you two are straight forward and honest with each other at every point, do not fear. Blessings.
2007-01-14 02:20:35 · answer #2 · answered by truckinotter 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i think that many of us have a bisexual side to us that never gets explosed or explored.. intimacy sounds like the key issue here. you loved each other as friends for long and probably told each other all your intimate secrets, and i guess you were both horny.. and things just happened.
if you both enjoyed it and both want to do it again.. and if you both want to try a relationship, then go for it!
don't worry about labelling yourselves gay or bi.. just enjoy it and take it from there.. sounds like you've fallen in love and that is awesome..
but no, i have never actually experienced this. but i hope i do sometime.. i have tons of close friends that i'd love to take things further with! but i always hesitate to ask because in most cases, i know that they would decline...
2007-01-14 02:20:24 · answer #3 · answered by Jeff 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
I am not gay so I don't know but I'd be so happy if you guys stayed close. I had to stop myself from falling for my gay best friend. There was just kind of connection that we have & have never lost. It might not work out as a relationship but remember friendships last forever, relationships sometimes don't.
2007-01-14 02:17:25 · answer #4 · answered by gitsliveon24 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Awww Look, you two are just discovering your both Bi!!!
Congrats!!
Hon, our knowledge of our "self" is fluid and ever changing, our sexuality actually isn't. You haven't suddenly become straight or bi anymore than you suddenly became gay before.
You're just discovering another layer to who you are....and at the same time as your friend.
Celebrate it, have fun with it, be kind to it and always play safe!!
2007-01-14 02:26:53 · answer #5 · answered by DEATH 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
There is this little lesbian "boy" at the pharmacy. I say "boy" because she is sooooooo cute and looks just like a boy. I have to keep reminding myself that she is a girl and it wouldn't work! I'm oddly attracted to her.
2007-01-14 02:25:24 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
People change , may be you did , so go for it , nothing to loose and maybe thats the one for you and can make a family and live happy as normal people .
2007-01-14 02:39:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
nah..dont worry about it.. happens and just dont stress just see where it goes and go from there..if its strange i probably have had it happen in my lifetime or known someone that it happen too.. just let it go and see where it goes . don't stress over it..
2007-01-14 02:15:00 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
hm.......maybe ur turning straight!......u really need to think hard about this! do u feel like that you felt way better than u have ever felt when u were with gurls?
2007-01-14 02:19:12 · answer #9 · answered by love_cooools 1 · 1⤊ 1⤋
That's hard, do whatever gives you the mosr sercurity for the future
2007-01-14 02:17:48 · answer #10 · answered by LB 3 · 1⤊ 1⤋