The dinner dilemma....we both hate to cook.?

Question

We both hate to cook but I get stuck with the chore. When I'm by myself and he is traveling I rarely eat at night because I have to up by 5:30 and commute. When he is home he likes home cooked meals later in the late evening. Sometimes he's home late and hasn't eaten all day. I find that the whole process way too long..cutting into my down time and I don't like to eat late and we both don't like the same kinds of food. I kinda resent the fact that I'm getting stuck doing something that takes a long time...meal planning, shopping, cooking, cleaning up. When I don't like to eat at home anyway.

Answer 1

Sit down and make up a menu of things you both like.You guys need to compromise and share the chores.Get some cookbooks with easy dinner ideas,like Rachael Ray's 30 minute meals.

Answer 2

We have the same problem. We do it together. Some compromise has to be made for times and preferences in food but that's what it's all about. If you both want to eat and both want home cooked meals then both have to give up some down time.

We make some simple meals, get some take out and eat some meals away from home. Also it's fun to trade meals with friends for things that you do well (like an oil change for 2 easy dinners).

I know it's a chore but it has to be resolved some way and doing it together does make for time to be with each other. And it means that your marriage is a little stronger for it.

Answer 3

I'm not sure what you're looking for here. You're not really asking for solutions - just venting. Are you asking if there is a way to have home cooked meals ready and waiting without cooking? Yes, hire a cook or subscribe to a meal delivery service. If those options are unreasonable for your lifestyle, budget you have to find a way to cook without it becoming such a large and dreaded chore.

One possibility, cook ahead. You and your husband can spend time cooking together on weekends and freeze meals for the week. Then you could have home cooked meals during the week without the hassle of daily cooking. Or maybe just cooking a quick side dish to go with a main entree you've prepared earlier.

Also, you need to sit down with your husband and negotiate a schedule of who'll do what when! It's better to discuss it and try to resolve it in a way that works for you both than to fume and resent him. If he's not willing to work on this, you may have deeper issues...

Answer 4

One thing I do to cut time is make up a menu for 2 weeks and go to the store for things I need. I compromise with my husband that I cook and he cleans ( our 4 year old helps him load the dish washer) My husband also travels and I love to spend as much time with him as possible so I clean as I go and I do food prep as soon as I get home from the store, ie; if I know that I'll be making sesame chicken one night I'll cut the chicken and put it in a bag labeled Sesame chicken. I trim and separate all my meats and try to pre make all sauces and marinades I'll be using in the next week. It cuts down on a lot of time and mess. You'd be surprised how much money you'll save by eating at home 5 out of 7 nights.Leftovers are real big in my house too chili, pot roast, chicken and dumplings things like that. Good luck

Answer 5

So why are you telling us? Tell him, compromise, and then work on it. Or just by microwave stuff, or get take out. If he wants home cooked food and you hate it, then tell him to cook. Or hire a cook. I don't understand why people say it takes so long. I can get something on the table in under 30 minutes every day. But I like to cook so I can make something that takes six hours and be ok with it.

Answer 6

I have to agree with you, I would rather eat out there are just 2 of us at home now and when I cook my husband is never ready to sit at the table he's always doing something else. So now if I cook it's for myself something small early and he cook's for himself when ever. But most of the time I grab something out. For us to eat together we have to make a date and we both help do the cooking and cleaning up. Most of the time that would be a Sunday. So try a date with each other and help each other.

Answer 7

Well you can buy precooked meals at the grocery store. If you can afford it order take out food from a great restaurant nearby. Or you can hire someone to cook for you if you can afford that. Or stick to tv dinners or salads. Why dont you plan your meals out at the beginning of the week, why dont you pick a certain day to grocery shop during the week, use the dishwasher if you dont want to wash dishes. I have seen magazines and cookbooks that have quick and easy meals that takes 15 to 30 minutes to cook and prepare. Why dont you buy one of those books/magazines. Also take turns cooking. Marriage takes two people to make it work. Have you COMMUNICATED to your husband about this problem?? You should tell him about it so you two can work something out. You SHOULDN'T be handling this problem by yourself.

Answer 8

Maybe you could experiment with making cooking a shared weekend chore. Cook lots of food, freeze it in meal-sized servings which can be microwaved whatever the time of night. (As far as him not having eaten all day--that's not your fault. He's big now and should know that's a crummy way to expect your body to function. No guilt on your part for that one.)

Answer 9

Tell him that.I had the same problem because I work so much and then get home late.I like home cooked meals also but it's not fair to ask a partner to do all the work just for one person.Find a food joint or grocery store that has home cooking and get it take out.

Answer 10

besides using a ton of money and eating out all the time, or eating out cheaply and unhealthily, you know already that you're going to have to learn to work together. it was hard but my girlfriend and i have managed (we're each at least half decent cooks) to cook together and can cook and eat now within an hour. that's not that long! an hour.

buy a few cookbooks with good and easy meals, they'll be called something of that nature, and start to work on those. it's difficult, it actually is to start, but it'll get fun and if all's well you'll start to feel good about it.