I need time to think it over and think about my interests. My husband is rushing me. He's already filed for divorce but I was not served with papers yet. Does anybody knows any loophole in such a situation. There must be something. Thanks you.
2007-01-13 14:40:51 · 29 answers · asked by Kat 2 in Politics & Government ➔ Law & Ethics
nope
once he files, it's just a matter of time unless you can get him to reconsider
2007-01-13 14:43:46 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 1⤋
Please understand Kat that the following is nothing more than an opinion. "Law" stands for lawyers @ work and generally only pertains to the new guy, or the rookie just out of law school. Most of these characters who are considered established in their field rarely have to do very little in terms of any physical labour. It is the subordinates within the legal office that do all the running and gather any information. The lawyer simply sits back, gives his head a shake and then considers all the ways he can legally bend or shape any law in accordance with the situation at hand.
My advice to you is to not allow yourself to become totally stressed with worry as you anticipate the arrival of any legal papers. Merely ensure that when they arrive you are there on the appointed date and plead ignorance to the court. The judge who is but only a gradutated and promoted lawyer is then going to tell you you should have legal representation to act upon your behalf. This in itself will further delay the matter. Perhaps not! All may be cut and dry and the entire episode may need only your signature in an agreement with the terms as presented by your husband's legal representative. My point being is that it seems you are looking for a stall tactic thus giving you more time to think and also for your other half to reconsider his motives. A lawyer does not give a tinkers damn about you or how you feel. He only cares that it will increase his bank account and you become nothing more than a sorry statistic. Play it out and take your time!
2007-01-13 15:27:17 · answer #2 · answered by Brian H 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Once he files, you will get served. You can try to avoid it, but it is inevitable. So, just accept it. There is a lengthy time before the divorce is final, when you can try to get him to reconsider, or you can decide whether to just agree to it or to fight it. But the reality is, that fighting it does nothing but cause bitter feelings that take longer to heal, and cost you a lot of money for lawyers. If there are kids, their needs to be with both parents is the most important. Beyond that, there are State rules regarding child support, that you should at least have a lawyer check, so it is fair both ways. If there are no kids, then the only things to settle are dividing the property (which should be 50-50 for everything that was not owned prior to the marriage, and any alimony that you want him to pay you.
Bottom line -- if he is determined to get a divorce, there really isn't a lot you can do. It is better to settle fairly and quickly. It sucks, but it is the reality. There are a lot of great guys out there -- just take your time...
2007-01-13 14:53:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
I don't mean to be cruel, but I don't think there is anything for you to decide here. He has already made that decision for you. The best thing that you can do for yourself right now is get a good lawyer. The lawyer will look out for your best interests for you. You could contest the divorce and that will buy you some time but just remember that the longer the divorce drags out, the more expensive it will become for both of you. I don't know where you live, but I do know in CT before you can get divorced, you have to get mandatory mirrage councelling before the court will proceed. That too would buy you some time. It sounds to me like you are in shock. My best advice to you is to snap out of it and do it quickly. If you don't, this man could easily walk all over you and worse than leave you with nothing, he could leave you with more debt than you could possibly ever afford. Find an attorney and find a good one. Let the attorney take it from there. I wish you the best of luck!
2007-01-13 14:55:21 · answer #4 · answered by Goddess 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Hasn't served the papers yet? You have a long time before you actually get divorced then. If you want to drag it out, wait until 2 weeks before the final divorce date and then contest the divorce. That will add another 6 months to the divorce. My brother filed papers on Dec. 28th, 2006 and the divorce was finalized on Nov. 2nd, 2007.
Some fun facts:
1. Divorce papers don't need to be signed to get divorced.
2. If he files for divorce, a divorce will happen. Whether you hide or not.
3. Yes, you can keep contesting the divorce and drag it out for a long time. But, unless you are fighting for millions, is it worth it?
2007-01-13 14:48:22 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Actually, what I had to do with my ex-wife was to get the lawyer to draw up papers that would allow the divorce to go through whether or not my ex signed the papers. There is usually a 6 month delay from the time the separation occurs to the time that it can be finalized. Since I do not know the whole story, I would start to look for a place to stay and to start your life over again without him. I would also recommend not going out socializing with single men until after the divorce is over with because anything that either of you do can be held against them until the courts dissolve your marriage.
2007-01-13 14:48:06 · answer #6 · answered by andy 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
You could file for a "legal separation" and serve it on him first, which must be settled before the divorce proceedings will be heard. Then stall the legal separation as long as you want! Or, once you are served, file objection to it, demand a jury trial, and drag it out for a few years!
2007-01-13 16:55:34 · answer #7 · answered by alaskasourdoughman 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get a lawyer so you can have your own interests protected. If he wants the divorce there really isn't anything you can do to stop it but by hiring an attorney you can have some protection for yourself.
2007-01-13 14:45:32 · answer #8 · answered by ? 5 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just hurry up and get a lawyer. As soon as you get a lawyer on your side, you can talk with your lawyer about your ideas and interests. Your lawyer will fight for you. Even if you don't know what you want yet, the lawyer can do stuff to "stall" the process. I'm sure there's some legal excuse that can be given.
2007-01-13 14:44:48 · answer #9 · answered by gabound75 5 · 3⤊ 1⤋
Why would you want to be tied down to someone who obviously doesn't want to be with you ? The sooner you
get the divorce the sooner you can get on with the rest of your life and find the person who can appreciate you and love you for who you are and all that you have to offer.
2007-01-13 15:04:56 · answer #10 · answered by daizzddre 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Game over. Are you trying to force him to live out the rest of his life with you when he has decided against it. Think the name Laci Peterson refreshes your memory. The only loophole you will find might be around your neck lady. Better Single than Dead. Get moving. Look forward.
2007-01-13 14:48:32 · answer #11 · answered by saran_d 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋