Should a woman have to take a man's last name during marriage?

Question

I don't understand why women have to.

Answer 1

She does not HAVE to. In fact, it does not happen unless she requests the name change legally (in the US, at least)

Most husbands strongly prefer that their wives adopt their last names.

The entire family having the same last name is practical.
They avoid the confusion of "so, how are you related?"

Parents and children having the same last name eliminates confusion on the part of others as to the relationship.

Having the same last name as his/her parents, siblings, grandparents, uncles/aunts/cousins, etc. helps to give the children a sense of belonging to a group. Think family reunions.

As shown by the fact that the vast majority of women adopt their husband's last name shows that they appreciate the practical advantage of the practice and that she wants to demonstrate how she feels about being his wife; how much respect she has for him.

For work purposes, sometimes she may need to hyphonate it for a period.

The one exception would be if the name would otherwise die out (no male brothers or cousins to carry it on).

Answer 2

Legally speaking, a woman in the U.S. always has the right to retain her maiden name. Marriage certificates in all states provide a line for the woman to write in her new married name if she would like to make any changes. If she does not fill this in, her maiden name stands and no changes are made.

The complications only arise when either the husband or wife want to do something other than the traditionally accepted name change for the wife. If the man wants to take his wife's name or the couple want to change their name to something entirely different (ie. a name that combines their two last names using parts of their old names) the bureaucracy gets in the way and you must go through a costly and sometimes complicated legal procedure for changing your name.

It may not be equitable or inexpensive, but everyone in the U.S. (except criminals) can change their name using the court system.

Answer 3

It's an old convention dating back to the bad old days when women were considered property. She was given her father's name growing up when she was her father's responsibility, and when her father gave her to her husband, she took her husband's name. There are a lot of wedding traditions that still refer back to the whole "bride as chattel" thing. I think it's ooky, but the couple should decide how to deal with the last name thing on their own. It's their family, and what does it matter to the rest of us if they're happy?

Answer 4

It's becoming more and more acceptable for women to keep their names or hyphenate. Personally, I wouldn't want to give my children the hyphenated name because they can just get so long. And then what if a girl with a hyphenated name decides she wants to hyphenate her last name with her husband, then there will just be too many names. It just gets sticky.

I don't really see a problem with taking your husband's name - I don't see it as women being subordinate to men, it just makes things simpler, and a lot of women like showing their union that way.

Answer 5

Women don't have to, it has just been an accepted practice. It stems from the ownership of property and patrilineality; women were considered property (and in some areas of the world, they still are) and would then take the name of their owner. These days, it is acceptable for the women to decide if they want to take a man's name or not within western society, but most just opt to stick with tradition.

Answer 6

nOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO! You dont have to!! Keep your last name its part of your identity.. why should you change it! You can incorporate your husbands name with yours!! You are not a piece of property.... Just because you married you need to take the husbands last name!!! Their is no ownership involved here! Its not a bussiness transaction! If he loves you he will let you keep your last name!! That is a good way to test if he is a woman hater!!!! Im definatly keeping my last name!!! Its a matter of principle for me and if my man takes me as i am he will not let the last name story get into our way of happiness.

Answer 7

Well boo, to open up your eyes a little bit...what is that saying of your "love" for him if thats a problem when the marriage hasnt even begun as yet? If we(we being the general public) make comments like "i would die for you" then what is so much as changing a name? Don't you find that a bit hypocritical? If not, then plainly enough that the "love" YOU have for him was never love to begin with. Yes i said it. Love is suppose to be unconditional. But i can't blame you(you meaning the society on a whole) because the media has brained wash our minds as to what "love" really is but thats a whole other topic. OR you have another option(which i would more go along with this one) where you can say it is "love" BUT the focus now shifts from love to YOU have unresolved issues with men in your life.
ONly you know the answer to that myfriend.
I'm glad i could share my taughts with you.

Answer 8

neither do i sweetie. women are NOT property. why should they have to take a man's last name. and speaking of which today i just read an article in which a man was trying to change his last name to his wife's name and the state was giving him trouble. where's the equality?
by taking your hubands last name you are devaluing your identity. the name you parents gave you-how can you just throw it away. marriage does not mean that you belong to someone. and if so then why doesnt your husband take YOUR last name? men just seem to need a reason to control women and this is yet another.
i personally will never change my name. if my husband loves and respects me as an equal he wont expect me to either. why should i leave the name my parents gave me? i am who i was before and therefore my name stands.

Answer 9

Nowadays-no. before it was the property of the man ..ie the women. Also...

Protection of family and wealth
Designation of a new life direction
Acknowledgement of God’s presence in and endorsement of the marriage


As for me, when i got married, i kept my last name. I did not want to change it.
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“All I want is my name. He can have the rest. But I want my name. I earned it.”

Tina Turner at her divorce hearing from Ike Turner

Answer 10

The only reason that she would is to follow patriarchal traditions.
I don't agree with this at all and I think that in the least the names should be hyphenated so that she doesn't have to totally give up her identity.