what are some ways to quiet an argument with a customer without kissing butt.?

Question

I am a healthcare professional. Unfortunately, our business has to deal with people who are just downright rude or take offense when they don't get their way. In healthcare, the customer is NOT always right and there needs to be an aura of professionalism. However, lately, I find these characters bringing me down to their level of settling a dispute. How do you argue sensibly with people who resort to jeuvenile tactics when they find themselves with no valid argument to begin with??

Answer 1

Hi,
I am bit amused by the question.
Why? It’s your response and the way you wrote it here. Most important question to ask yourself is; what is being “PROFESSIONAL”. It would be better to subdivide your question into two parts

1)What is professionalism or being professional? ( considering that you are health-care provider in any sense)
Other than being composed, dignified, cool, calm, organized, etc, there are few terms used in health which are:

Being” Beneficent”

It means that you MUST be beneficial to your patients or clients. It states MUST, not should or could. You MUST.

Non-maleficent:

that is you MUST NOT be harmful to any of your patients or client under any situation and in any way including physically, emotionally, while talking , while giving them advice (depending on your job level) in all aspects.

In brief, if cannot not be beneficial to your clients or patients depending on your knowledge or vision, you must not harm them or be harmful. You should refer them to the person who is more eligible or have that desired knowledge to be beneficial.

Counterference:
(Avoiding or controlling your reaction in response to them)
So, as a professional, you must be able to control your feelings even if they are disturbing, or against your own set of thinking or beliefs or faiths. You must avoid imposing yourself under any situation. You don’t have to agree with them as healthcare provider and they don’t need to agree with you.

2)Patient’s or client’s juvenile attitudes or actions or behaviors or arguments:
(Assuming that you are correct in your pasted question and your clients are entirely fool to argue with you even though they are there to seek help from you)
Let’s assume that they are mentally handicapped and disturbed emotionally and you are to guide them. You know they are incapable of correct or organize or logical thinking. It is you who can not they. So you don’t have to argue with them. YOU CAN PROVIDE THEM INDIRECT SUGGESTIONS as psychologists or psychiatrist do. They might be wrong, but you are supposed to not confront them rather provide them the treatment and solutions of their problems. Controlling your reaction or over-reaction is very important part of being “professional”. It is not sometimes, easy but this is the way it is.
“Dragging you to their level” is not in question as health care provider.( it is not being SUPERIOR OR INFERIOUR) Simply speaking, they are needy and they are reflecting their emotions right or wrong, directly or indirectly, your job is to understand it and give them the best of you if you can or refer them if you cannot manage them.

You are dealing with human beings who are not “things or non-living objects” but human beings, your own race seeking HELP. You are not fixing them. You are treating them.

Honestly, your question reflects your anger which should not be there. My opinion is that you need to study more in this topic and I do hope that you will be able to resolve your personal conflicts and reactions while being aware of few more aspects in managing your patients or clients.

With Regards:

Answer 2

you do it by seeming to take their side while still telling them no. Validate their feelings first. "I'm so sorry, this must be so frustrating for you, I can see why you are upset. I wish I could help you and if it was up to me things would be different, but these are the facts of the situation." It's not YOU who is rejecting them, it's the company, YOU are on their side, and if there was anything possible that you could do to accomodate them, you would. That's the attitude to take. A sincere apology and the feeling of being heard can diffuse ALMOST anybody.

For the rest of them, one tip I've found that works wonders, is, don't say anything unless they asked a question. "you stupid idiots, you don't even care about the people you are supposed to be helping!" is not a question and does not require a response. A blank stare will suffice. If they demand a response, say, "Did you have a question?" and then when they do finally come up with a question, just repeat your initial answer over and over. But that's a last resort if kindness doesn't work.

Answer 3

When I worked in an ER for five years, I found it helpful to reflect back what the person was saying, reassuring them that I knew their point of view.

Then I told them the reality of the situation, in a way they would understand. And usually I repeated it in synonyms, so that it was essentially said twice.

Then I gave them options, stressing the better choice if it were me or one of my loved ones.

If someone had time, I'd have a co-worker with me to back me up. We had a chaplain in the ER many times and that person was often very very valuable to talk to the unreasonable person.

Last resort: Telling the patient or their family/friend that I would see if the charge nurse could come when there was a moment, but that could take some time.

Answer 4

You don't have to kiss butt! Just stick to your code of ethics and be professional.

If the person is being unreasonable - tell him so - or direct them to your supervisor - don't take the abuse on yourself.

As a customer service agent - you are going to have to deal will a lot of different personalities and some of the will be nice - some not.

Just remain calm, don't get excited, because then the irate person will know they are getting to you - ask them to take a seat and you'll get back to them, figure out a rational, logical answer/solution and then call them back. If they reject it - tell them to either - LEAVE or you'll call the police, or call your superior - who might do the same.

In any case you probably don't want this person to be in your office anyway.

Answer 5

Explain to them you are the professional and you are paid for your professional opinion. Just always stay calm with them or that gives them just more reasons to act ignorant. Let them know if they are unsatisfied with what you tell them they can always go else where and get a 2nd, 3rd, etc..opinion and they will finally end up seeing the truth.

Answer 6

uh? give an example. Are you telling to go on a diet, etc.
This is happened at a military hospital, they lost my folder, I've got asthma. They told me to make another apt , I waisted 3 hrs for non thing! I also walked out with a burning gall badder

Answer 7

acknowledge their feelings, do not patronize them or act like you are smarter than them even if you are, realize they are scared, frightened, angry that they are in the situation, and do not take it personally no matter what - their complaints are not about you and they do not take your feelings into consideration when they are trying to get treatment.

If you consider all these points I think you'll find you're the one who's in control and there's no need to stress when someone gets in your face.

Hang in there, you are very valuable to them even if they don't know it.

Answer 8

--don't approach them w/a negative attitude
--stop expecting them to be argumentative
--try to empathize w/their situtation...afraid...tired...
...sick...

--remember your "training" (you DID say you are a professional)...it'll help you "remember" how you were taught to deal w/this exact problem
--try to understand that YOUR negativity is only going to hurt you...slow you down...increase their "hostility"


--this is your "chosen" job.
--these people are your clients (and your bread & butter)
--they are NOT "these characters"

--you are NOT someone above them, who has to go "down to their level"

--if your job description doesn't require you to "argue" w/your "customers", then why are you doing it

--remember...in truth, you set the tone of the interaction....apparently, your customers see you as someone they have to "deal with" and be "rude to"...so, they try to get their licks in first.


maybe you should take a vacation.
perhaps, in a classroom of another field.

Answer 9

I love being an ambulance driver. The best thing about my job, is I hand people like that over to you guys. (Sorry) We try and be nice, but in the end, its their problem, not yours. If they don't want to go to the hospital because their heart is in defib, sign the damn papers, and we'll be on our way!

Answer 10

Hello
Try saying
Yes you are right and I am wrong I only work here I don't know anything and there is nothing I can do for you - now we have that out of the way..how can I help?


Good Luck