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I often get angry usually at small things. But to vent the anger, i'll end up punching walls, or anything within reach. It wasn't so bad, because i could keep my anger at home, but now i can hardly control myself at school, so i like punch lockers, filing cabinets etc, not in a really violent way, but just angry. I never hit PEOPLE, just things. Does anyone have any effective, unusual ways to control my anger??

Many thanks =]] xx

2007-01-13 06:43:41 · 21 answers · asked by Anonymous in Social Science Psychology

21 answers

I think that you need to talk to someone. There is evidently something in your life that you are not happy with. If you go talk to a counselor they can get to the root of your problem and offer you ways of properly dealing with your emotions.

2007-01-20 03:36:44 · answer #1 · answered by supersweetfungal 3 · 1 0

I know how it is, I have been there. Well, what I did was I went in for counseling and started practicing meditation and deep breathing for 10 minutes and Yoga for 20 minutes every day. One important thing in managing your anger is first of ruling out depression from your system. Excessive anger is an indicator for depression.
I would suggest 1 hour of exercise every single day without fail, helps you from getting over the edge and being angry at small things. Join a gym, play some sport that is very strenuous or some form of exercise for an hour daily is a very effective way. Please also try deep breathing and counting 100 to 1 backwards when you feel that you are getting angry. Being conscious of your feelings and reactions is the best way to handle this
Trust me you will be fine in a week's time once you start doing the above mentioned things. Good luck

2007-01-13 06:56:43 · answer #2 · answered by SP 4 · 1 0

I had the same thing develop with road rage - it seems the more I indulged in it the more I did it and the more dangerously too. I really had to just resolve not to handle it in that way any more. Any time I felt the rage coming on I stop myself and say "No, this is not how I want to handle this any more" and take a deep breath and change my behavior to ultra safe. It's just not an option any more.

Interestingly, I have found this works on various things - this is how I stopped fist fighting with my sister, smoking cigarettes etc. - it's a matter of being in control of yourself and your mind. Often times I have found that it takes about 6-8 weeks of consistent behavior to really make the new behavior second nature - so you must be vigilant, particularly in the very beginning. Often time when we try to change our anger reaction, we get big crazy things that tempt us into keeping our old behavior. If you give in to that temptation and lose your temper, you kind of go back to start. Each time you resolve you can get a little further until one day you can even recognize it for the test it is and laugh at it. That's when you know it is over and the change has occurred.

Peace!

PS - Oh, yeah. Yoga is great. Seated poses are good for grounding and the balancing poses are great for balance (of course). You can find out lots more at http://www.yogajournal.com - they have instructions for every pose (some can give you nice muscle definition too) and the Pose Finder can help you target certain body parts and physical benefits.

2007-01-13 06:54:30 · answer #3 · answered by carole 7 · 1 0

My son, as a teenager had the very same issues. He would almost explode if a fly landed on him. Anyway, I went to the health food store and inquired about Homeopathic Tissue Salts. The body is made up of these elements in both positive and negative chemical balance. I do not remember which one I gave him, so you will need to ask someone at the health food store, but within a couple of days of taking these small, dissolvable tablets, he was on his way back to himself. Within a month, he no longer required them.
It usually only takes a month to get yourself in balance with these.
Please, do yourself and those who love you a favor, and go to the health food store. This is the safest, and most natural way to put an end to all of this, and give you back your life.
Of course you can go to a dr. who will put you on one or more drugs, which are man made, synthetic chemicals, that can cause an imbalance somewhere else in your body because they don't belong there. But I truly hope you will give the natural way a try.
Good luck to you.

2007-01-20 06:24:14 · answer #4 · answered by jmiller 5 · 0 0

Simple relaxation tools, such as deep breathing and relaxing imagery, can help calm down angry feelings. There are books and courses that can teach you relaxation techniques, and once you learn the techniques, you can call upon them in any situation. If you are involved in a relationship where both partners are hot-tempered, it might be a good idea for both of you to learn these techniques.

Some simple steps you can try:

Breathe deeply, from your diaphragm; breathing from your chest won't relax you. Picture your breath coming up from your "gut."

Slowly repeat a calm word or phrase such as "relax," "take it easy." Repeat it to yourself while breathing deeply.

Use imagery; visualize a relaxing experience, from either your memory or your imagination.

Nonstrenuous, slow yoga-like exercises can relax your muscles and make you feel much calmer.
Practice these techniques daily. Learn to use them automatically when you're in a tense situation.

The goal of anger management is to reduce both your emotional feelings and the physiological arousal that anger causes. You can't get rid of, or avoid, the things or the people that enrage you, nor can you change them, but you can learn to control your reactions.

2007-01-18 17:04:08 · answer #5 · answered by Prasun Saurav 3 · 0 0

Drink Chamamile tea hot with honey in the am before you go to school. The maker of "sleepy time" tea has a new tea called "Tension Tamer" has a pic of a dragon and a lady on the front of the box. It works. also you can try putting a few drops of rosemary oil on a hankerchief and any time you start to feel stressed or angry take it out and breathe in the fumes. It has a great calming affect.

2007-01-19 00:58:37 · answer #6 · answered by kyishiafrazier 2 · 1 0

How is it working for you? It certainly doesn't sound like it is. Give some thought to what you get angry about. If it is going to effect your life for a long time then you need to give it more thought. If you won't remember what it was about tomorrow then just release it and let it go. When you want to punch something, bite your lip instead and that should awaken your common sense. Try acting more mature and see yourself how others are seeing you. You are a wonderful human being who needs to tie her hand to her body and smarten up.

2007-01-19 11:18:48 · answer #7 · answered by kimballama 3 · 0 0

Much has been said about how necessary it is to express feelings but acting out anger only increases it. Deep breaths and trying to figure out what is really going on, getting some distance and being honest about what's going on inside you will usually defuse your anger and get to the heart of it. Then you can begin to solve the problem behind it. It's usually not about whatever the trigger was.

2007-01-13 07:24:30 · answer #8 · answered by willow78 1 · 1 0

We all get angry at little things in life the only thing is how we resolve the conflict you do it by punching walls this is not a healthy way to vent your anger. Try another form of expression instead.

2007-01-13 07:04:17 · answer #9 · answered by Panzerpaul1955 2 · 0 1

Sometimes when we react emotionally to something, like a friend passing by in the corroidor without saying Hi, we don't react directly to the event (where they might have just been deep in thought about something or distracted), but to 'what the event MEANS to us' (such as 'they no longer want to be my friend. They've snubbed me').

So instead of having a mild reaction to what happened, we have a big violent reaction to what it 'means' to us, something we've constructed in our imaginations, maybe mis-understood and which drags up old memories of where other people have snubbed us or offended us in a similar way in the past.

If you stop and think for a second about 'does this situation mean what I think it means?', you might get less angry.

I'm not saying your thinking is 'mistaken' or 'don't think or feel a particular way', just take a second to re-assess the situation and maybe your feelings will change.

Another cause, is where you get over-sensitive to people 'dis-respecting you', such as ...

Adults (teachers and your parents) treating you like a kid.

Teachers or parents who are control-freaks, stopping you showing even the tiniest bit of rebellion or breaking the odd school-rule or going out at night, etc.

Big dominant kids in the class throwing their weight around

Immature kids annoying you.

Straight-laced kids showing off by answering all the teachers questions in class, which you might take as an implication that you're less intelligent than them and then take offence.

Other kids spreading lies or rumours about you or acts of bullying, no matter how small.

Tiny or implied insults, where the insult 'means' a lot more to you than it does to the person saying it. Again, where you're reading more into the situation than is actually there.

Girlfriend/boyfriend problems, such as people showing off the fact that they have got a boyfriend/girlfriend at a time when you haven't.

Ask friends or people on here for ideas on how to deal with each situation.

If its really serious, Cognitive Behaviour Therapy is good, where you and/or a therapist write down your thoughts and chain of reasoning and see whether your way of reaching conclusions is right or or whether with more examination of the evidence, you might reach different conclusions and feelings about a situation. You're taught to become your own therapist, so you can analyse situations and change your anger yourself. There are books on Amazon about it, such as "Exploring Feelings: Cognitive Behaviour Therapy to Manage Anger" and plenty of other books about Anger Management that arn't based on CBT. Its important to get this sorted out, so ask your parents to buy one.

2007-01-13 06:55:45 · answer #10 · answered by ricochet 5 · 1 0

hi Tnisha It sounds like a continual habit you stepped ahead someplace on your existence. in case you've always had this project, it truly is totally in all probability one in all of your moms and dads bargains with their frustration interior of an same way. you should re-figure your self in this section. First - there are countless anger administration books in bookstores or accessible on line. 2d - virtually each city or city has an anger administration help team the position you are able to the excellent thanks to regulate your anger earlier it receives finished-blown. 0.33 - This also falls lower than Cognitive-Behavioural remedy. attempt an section psychological health medical institution, in case you do not have the money to be sure a therapist, or locate a psychologist who bargains with Anger administration subject matters. Sorry to allow you to recognize this, yet as we become older, our undesirable conduct get even worse except we interfere and modify. good success.

2016-10-31 00:25:53 · answer #11 · answered by ? 4 · 0 0

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