Yrs of immature, knee jerk reactions and rash decisions have left me with a lot of failure. How do I change?

Question

I am overwhelmed by the chronic chaos in my life. Although there are positive qualities about me (I'm generous, I've been told that I've got a good sense of humor and I'm a strong person), the fact is that the character flaw immaturity reigns supreme in me. Specifically, laziness and unchecked, self-centered emotions have dominated every life decision I've faced and been a obstacle to personal change. I'd describe my lifestyle as dramatic, unstable and unproductive. I've been practically nomadic because I've not prioritized good housing. My work history is like my academic history: I demonstrate great potential, but rarely carry through with consistancy or self discipline. My relationships are mostly short lived, filled with conflict and usually end on a bad note. Now 44 I've finally learned that peace is a choice related more to effort than fate. I know I've got to change my "self" if I want to change my life. So many failures have left me doubting my abilities.
Where/how do I begin?

Answer 1

Start by learning to like yourself.
You have made a great start by recognizing your weaknesses.

Live simply and make small goals to start. The achievement is addicting and you'll soon find everything easier. One step at a time.

I have found that most people who have the problems you've described are what I call "The Self-Destructors". These individuals have above average intelligence - tons of potential. Their major flaw is fear that they will fail. They choose to fail instead.