ok heres my problem/question I married I man I truly love but I am having difficulties accepting his past. He has had threesomes both with girls and guys and pretty much done every sexual thing possible, I am learning more and more that basically he was a male whore and I feel incredibly uncomfortable and grossed out about it. What should I do?
2007-01-13 03:57:49 · 16 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Mindy, if you love him, and he has been a good husband to you, (no cheating, no kinky stuff, etc.) then forget about his past.
He married you because you are better than his past, sweetie.
2007-01-13 04:15:21 · answer #1 · answered by David G 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Well first this is why you should not discuss a lovers past...it bears no fruit....only problems.
Secondly is this man still living that away? If not then his past is just what it is....in the past. We all do stupid things in our past that we all regret....should these things always carry our future? No......If a person does not learn from there past then that's different.
If you love this man the way you claim and he has given all that stuff up and its all where it belongs....behind him....then why should that effect the way you feel towards the new man he has become?
Love him for who he is or become and accept him for all his lifes mistakes and quit asking about it all....or let him go and mark this as a lesson you learned.....which is live your significant others past in the past.
Good luck
2007-01-13 12:18:54 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
didnt you ask about his past before you married him?well dont worry, there is no need to worry yourself about his past it was before you so you shouldnt concern yourself with it.Im sure you have done some things in your past that are bothersome to him if he knew, but y dwell on the past you cant go back n change anything so just focus on the present and future with your husband make your own memories together dont dwell on the ones he made when he didnt even know you.set your mind at ease the man married you he loves you and treats you good thats all that matters
2007-01-13 12:22:18 · answer #3 · answered by christine w 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You can't change what happened in the past. If he has stopped doing that stuff, all you can do is look forward. Because what's in the past is done. But I suggest that you tell him that your uncomfortable with what he did in the past and that you don't want any part of that garbage.
2007-01-13 12:04:50 · answer #4 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You married him for better or worse. There are things that he did before you married him that he can't change or take back. You probably did too. just learn to accept it, unless he still craves these things.
2007-01-13 12:23:38 · answer #5 · answered by H.B.K. 2 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
i had to accept my wifes past as well. she did a lot of drugs, became an alcholic, and slept with 32 guys. it was hard accepting her past, but i did it and got over it. things that happend in the past are that persons past. it isnt that person today. try to look past it. if you honestly think you cant do it, then it is best to leave.
2007-01-13 12:19:42 · answer #6 · answered by young grown man 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I can't the past go as well. I just don't do anything with my lover that is new to me and not to her. Try not to think about it. I would personally devorce him. If he couldn't tell you these things before you were married, then there is a problem.
2007-01-13 12:02:10 · answer #7 · answered by nshappe 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
I hate to say this because you do not want to hear it I know, but you might as well go ahead and get a divorce, sooner rather than later. I ran into a similar thing in my marriage, and tried to overlook it for years, but I never did. It haunted me night and day, I NEVER accepted it! Good Luck to you...I hope YOU can!!
2007-01-13 12:09:01 · answer #8 · answered by olderbutwiser 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Did you know this before you married him? Were all the "cards on the table" so to speak? If they weren't, and you don't like what you are finding out, and you regard it as a deal-breaker, bail, hon. simple
2007-01-13 12:47:05 · answer #9 · answered by April 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I hate to say it but if you are this upset about it. I doubt the thoughts will ever go away. This maybe something that will bother you forever. I wish I could help but I dont know what to tell you.
2007-01-13 12:06:34 · answer #10 · answered by Lil lady 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋