Okay we have been together for 5 years, have a 14 month old son and another little boy on the way due in June. Lately I cannot find it in myself to be attracted to him in a sexual way. I really want to be intimate but the desire is just not there. Any advice?
2007-01-13 03:30:14 · 18 answers · asked by flaminfortune 3 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
There is nothing wrong with him physically or anything like that, he is very attractive, I just can't seem to get "in the mood"
2007-01-13 03:37:18 · update #1
when people get used to each other like you two have, you do not dress up or act nice anymore when you come home, when you come home from work, take your work clothes off and put on something REAL nice just for HIM..to make him smile, and have him do the same thing...instead of putting on sweats, make yourself look like your going out, just for him, sooner or later it has to get his attention...and make him do the same thing, even if you two have to take showers when you come home to get pretty smelling DO IT, I know you have a child there, but you still can flirt an pinch and get him READY for the bed when you get there.
try it, make believe you two are dating again, like in the beginning when you two could not keep each others hands off of each other, and every time he walked into the room, you JUST HAD to check him out, do stuff like that, and on Friday or Saturday, get a baby sitter and take him out to eat and a little dancing
and when you get him in bed, wear him out so bad, he WILL sleep late the next morning, do everything you ever wanted to do..
go for it
2007-01-13 03:39:51 · answer #1 · answered by david s 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
This could be due to the fact that you are pregant. Even if the first time you were pregnant, you had no problem with it, each pregnancy is different, and it could just be your hormones right now making you not want to be sexual with him. Don't pressure yourself to be sexual with him; just take care of yourself. Cuddle a lot. Do what you need to do, but don't do anything you're not comfortable with.
If this continues AFTER you have the baby, though, you may want to see a marriage counselor.
2007-01-13 11:41:43 · answer #2 · answered by AnswerMom 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
well it may haev to do with you being pregnant, since i am pretty sure being in that state effects your hormones and such.
How long have you felt this undesirable feeling towards him? if it is only recent it might be just a phase, i would wait it out before you start to worry.
Look back at what attracted him to you in the first place, find a way to recliam that feeling you got when you first met. Take time to talk with him too, find out where he stands about this, is he feeling the same way?
communication between a couple is important, he is not goign to be able to help if he is unaware of a problem.
good luck
2007-01-13 11:36:59 · answer #3 · answered by kevin O 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Don't worry------------- I think it's your hormones at this time, and during pregnancy they can go wild!
I'm sure it's a passing thing. Talk to your Gyn. about this. Who knows better than a specialist, right?
You are aware of your feelings, just go with them for now and don't push yourself on the subject, ok? At this time you need to be relaxed and happy because you know everything, and I mean, EVERYTHING passes to the baby in the womb! Once you have the baby, let yourself rest and you will get your feelings back, really! I take it, your first pregnancy wasn't this way! Every pregnancy is different after all.
In the meantime, talk to your Husband. He's with you, he'll understand, sweetie!!!
Have a healthy baby!
You will be fine!
2007-01-13 11:39:32 · answer #4 · answered by julesrules 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If you are three months PG, it's hard sometimes to find a "spark", especially if you are already taking care of one.That's a full time job right there and you are probably worn out. Does he help you with the baby? Maybe if he did, you could take a little break to recover. That would do wonders towards igniting the spark.
2007-01-13 11:39:14 · answer #5 · answered by Tori M 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
It's not uncommon for women to lose interest in sex durring pregnancy, especially early on in the pregnancy. Your body is going through a lot of changes. During your first pregnancy, you may have desired sex alot. And like they say, every pregnancy is different.
Wish you the best.
Take care and God Bless
2007-01-13 11:50:06 · answer #6 · answered by Bryan M 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Abstinence makes the heart grow fonder. Ok, it's absence. But seriously, if you're not attracted to him sexually, take a break from it. Is he just not attractive? Needs to lose weight, or what is the baseline problem?
2007-01-13 11:34:53 · answer #7 · answered by Dacious P.I. 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are burning the candle at both ends, you have a baby and another is on his way. your body is a hormonal mess.
Of course you don't want sex, your exhausted and need to let yourself rest before your next son is born.
In time you will bounce back and things will be back to normal.
2007-01-13 11:36:46 · answer #8 · answered by eyes_of_iceblue 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋
You are getting into a rut. You need to break out of it.
Go out for the weekend just the two of you. Make it a special fun time for the two of you.
Good Luck to you.
2007-01-13 11:34:15 · answer #9 · answered by zen522 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Hormones can be a real romance killer. Talk with your doctor.
I know that it may feel strange talking about your intimate life with
your doctor but it does help usually.
2007-01-13 11:36:06 · answer #10 · answered by gailpendarvis 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋