Why do straight people assume that all gay men are effeminate or want to be a 'woman'?

Question

I AM A GAY MAN NAMED ASHLEY.

ASHLEY CAN BE A BOY'S NAME!!!!

Answer 1

Hi Ashley. Did you check out that site? Haven't heard from you in couple of days.
I don't know if there is any one answer to this. Perhaps it has to do with stereotyping and what they've seen on TV. Shows like Will and Grace may be fun to watch but they still portray us as prancing ninnies. And maybe since a lot of the criticism comes from str8 men who themselves play gender roles, that is applied to us because we have sex with men and therefore one of us just must be the girl. But that's a guess.

Answer 2

Since when do all gay people assume that all straight people believe that all gay people are effeminate and/or want to be a 'woman'?

Honestly, there have to be some that don't?

And when you ask this question, don't you think you're being a bit assuming yourself?

Answer 3

I think you get that assumption from people who are only aware of having met very few gay people. I say aware because lots of straight people meet gay people all the time but are unaware that the person is gay because their not big obvious stereotypes. So, they are only aware of the most "obvious" gay people they have met and think that "every gay person I meet is effeminate".

Thinking that gay men want to be women? Just ignorant.

Answer 4

I think that we can partly blame the media. For many years now films have depicted us as all flamboyant woman-wannabes (not that there's anything wrong with being like that!).

The only problem is that that's the only image of gay men that straight people had for a long time (also we were usually only there to make people laugh and to look foolish).

With this new wave of media that portrays us as being a more diverse group you'll find our larger social imagine changes.

This is very similar to what happened to the image of black people when they were portrayed as clowns on television way back when. It took time but the media eventually changed the image of black people and other racial minorities to be (hopefully) more reflective of reality. With the changes in media you find that the general social views tend to change with them.

You can also argue that this is process works in the reverse. In other words that the media is responding to the changes in social views as we become more progressive. I would argue though that when people have little exposure to a particular group they often use the media to help them form their views of that group.

Eep that was long (no pun intended ;) ),

Cheers,

Answer 5

Maybe it's because they do not know any better. Some people do not have any contact with gay men - and all they know are the pictures that they see from Gay Pride days and Key West or San Francisco parties.

Answer 6

Umm thanks a lot for generalizing by the way.
I think my next question will be "Why do gay men think straight people assume that all gay men are effeminate or want to be a 'woman'?

anyway, thats not true. not all straight people think that way.
I think some do, but i wouldn't stereotype them like that.
I mean hell i am stright and i sometimes wish i could be a lesbian, but i am not goign to think all striaght guys want that.
I think that maybe some people assume things because they are ignorant and/or stupid. you'll just have to try and exlpain that they are wrong and shouldnt be stereotyping you like that... or just larn to ignore ignorant people.

good luck.

Answer 7

Not ALL straight people think that. I don't.
Only the uneducated ones think that. They must be living with there head stuck up their butt and never come out to see what's going on.

I believe, that probably MOST gays don't show any obvious signs of being gay, whatsoever.

God, I'm glad I'm not that dumb. Those people are also probably the same ones that are prejudiced against gays.

I almost feel sorry for them. They would drive me nuts to be around them.

Answer 8

I don't assume that!! I know plenty of gay guys who aren't this way at all, and I know straight guys who I have sworn are gay, because they are so effeminate, but have gone on to get married.

Answer 9

Most of the teen aged straight people hanging out here have learned everything they know about gay people on Will & Grace and Richard Simmons.

Answer 10

It's just a stereotype. People rely on stereotypes when they don't want to be bothered to find out what the other person is really about. If it's not assumptions about sexuality, it's ethnicity, birth place, appearance. For what it's worth, I know that not all straight people buy in to this particular stereotype.