I punched my girlfriend in the face. I thought Id never resort to this. Basicly my Q: Is there any hope???

Question

We have been going out for almost 2 yrs. now. I Still love Her very much. Right after this incident hapen she moved out the next day. We both talk to each other like 3 times a week. She lives out of town @ her parents house. Im supprised her dad dident kill me. Its really hard for both of us to be away from each other but when we were living together we fought most of the time. We All herd of the Golden Rule, once they hit you leave them and never go back, because it will most likley happen again. Should I believe this whole heartedly or should just break all ties with her out of fear for Her getting hit by me again. I really need your advise on this. Thx.

Answer 1

First, the golden rule is to do unto others as you would have them do unto you.

Personally, I don't see this as a deal breaker. What spouse hasn't wanted to hit the other at some time. It's natural. Where it becomes a problem is when a pattern forms.

Do some soul searching and decide if the both of you can make it work. Admitting what you did and that you need to work on fixing a problem is a very good start.

Answer 2

If you have fought all the time in the relationship, it is not a healthy relationship and if it accelerated to a physical one then it is definitely an unhealthy and a very dangerous one.
Sorry but for the time being you must leave this relationship and deal with your anger issue first. Until you can honestly get professional help and overcome this issue you should not be in any relationship for the time being. To physically hurt a person is not Love. Love is not suppose to leave scars or bruises, an abuser does and these people don't know what love is really about. Get help before you end up killing the one you love.

Answer 3

If you have enough anger to hit her for any reason, no matter what the reason...it will happen again. You need to let her move on, no woman deserves that! Not saying you are a bad person, not at all...I'm just saying, you can't have that kind of anger at somebody you "love." You need to evaluate the feelings you are thinking are love... It may just be loving that you have somebody...totally different. If nothing else, let her make the choice. Even one hit can get you into a lot of trouble. My husband was accused of hitting a girl, but he hadn't...and he spent 6 months in jail...and that was very hard to only see him once a week for an hour... And that on your record will just kill any chance of a real life. You should just let it go!

Answer 4

I suggest you get some help so that you won't hit her again. Also you two need to be away from each other for awhile because if you're fighting all the time it is best to get away to find yourselves. If you find that you really miss your girl friend while you are away from her you two should get back together but be willing to make things work otherwise the relationship is not going to work because fighting and arguing is not a good relationship.

So take this time apart from each other to refect on your relationship, then when you two do move back in together you should communicate with each other rather than fighting and arguing also you should be set some ground rules for each other.

Answer 5

It is obvious that you are an abuser. The physical abuse comes after the emotional abuse. You are a controller and control is not love. You are probably each attic ted to each other. That is also not love. You need professional help. She should get help to find out why she stayed with you so long. If you really care about this woman you will stay away from her until you have been in therapy for a while and your counselor gives you the go ahead. I can't stress enough. Get professional help. You will ruin your life and someone elses. Including your future children.

Answer 6

I believe you do feel horrible about it, but even though you may think that was the only time, it wont be. Let her go. Break off ties with her, dont tell her you love her... it will just be giving her false hope and im sure shes falling apart inside. You dont need to be in a relationship at all until you complete counseling.

Answer 7

She did the right thing by leaving you and I hope she never returns. You should get some anger management so the next time you get a girlfriend, you will know how to handle things better than hitting anyone let alone a girl you supposedly love.

Answer 8

This is a serious problem and you should seek counseling for this immediately. You are fortunate that you are not in jail. Hitting someone you "love" is incongruent and I doubt you love her as much you want to control her. Men who abuse women have the pattern of abuse, feeling sorry, getting back together and than abuse her again. You need to get yourself under control and I am afraid this will take a long time.

Answer 9

First off, why did you hit her? That question needs explored! Then you need some "anger management" classes or counseling sessions. I would think that once you figure it all out, and get control of your emotions then and only then should you attempt a reconciliation. Good Luck...and remember, because it happened once does not mean it will happen again, but that really depends on you!

Answer 10

If you could only understand what it did to her psychological well-being. She probably doesn't know what it did right now. I think the question you should ask is: If she'd take you back after that. She probably won't. I think you should write her an email or letter to apologize, tell her how sorry you are and that you have never thought to resort to what happened, also you tell her that you love her with all your heart and that you would understand if she does not want you back and then wish her the best that you know in your heart that she deserves.