do you have to change your name when u get married?

Answer 1

It's not a legal requirement, and in lots of places it's not even a socially expected requirement. I'd think hard about it. A name carries a lot of identity with it. If you're got academic qualifications in your own maiden name, then you might want to stay as you are. The same applies if you have a business reputation. But also it might encapsulate how you feel about yourself, in which case changing has a lot of implications.

I kept my maiden name, because having been myself for twenty-four years, I didn't want to change that. It doesn't mean that sometimes I don't get addressed as Mrs myhusband'sname, or that we don't get Christmas cards addressed to Mr and Mrs. I don't mind that at all, it's an easy enough assumption to make, and it's not an insult. I know they mean me, and that's the important thing.

My husband didn't care either way, and our relationship is as a pair of individuals working in a team, rather than him being the boss and me the employee, and so that felt right for us. I'm kind of independant that way. If we have children, I imagine that they'll take my husband's name, perhaps with my maiden name as one of their middle names. I guess that's just traditional. If so, I might consider changing my name then, to be the same as them. There's no real logic to this, it's what FEELS right to me. You may be different.

Other things to consider might be whether you have any brothers. If your family name is going to be carried on regardless, you might feel more inclined to take your husband's name. There's also the option of hyphenation: note that some names just don't go together (eg Greene-Woods) without sounding strange. And also, what would any children do when THEY come to get married, except maybe double hyphenate (Smith-Jones-Greene-Woods is quite a mouthful). Or maybe they can make their own minds up when they're old enough.

The thing is, that it's your choice. Your husband's feelings are important, and you might want to take into account your family and social circle. But in the end it's what you will be called, and no one should choose that but yourself. Also, even if it's an unusual thing to do in your neck of the woods, it's your decision, and people will get used to whatever decision you make in the end, anyway.

Good luck!

Answer 2

This depends on local laws.

In most Commonwealth countries (and perhaps others) a woman changes her name to her husband's as a matter of custom, not of law; ie, you can keep your maiden name if you want to.

There is nothing to stop a man from changing his name to that of his wife if that is his wish.

You must, however, be consistent in which surname you use - you cannot use one surname for one purpose and the other surname for another.

You will have a problem with people "assuming" you have taken your husband's name. If you are yet to be married, perhaps you could include in the banns (or notice in the newspapers) that you will be keeping your name.

Also, a note in the "thank you" cards sent after the wedding may be appropriate.

Anyone who insists on addressing you by your husband's name after you have repeatedly told them that you have kept your own name is simply pig-headed, rude and bloody-minded.

By the way, the correct form of address for you and your husband would be "Mr A Smith and Ms B Jones".

Stick with it.

Answer 3

absolutely not... It's customary to take on the mans name but anymore women are choosing to keep their maiden names... Some just add the husbands name to the end of their own full name.. With the divorce rate at an all time high you might want to keep your own name due to all the legal paper work such as changing your name on all documents ( license, social security card, credit card etc) It's a very big pain in the @$$... however most men take offense at this option because you do not take their name.. Some others are secure in their lives and don't mind.. But the majority of men do care..Do what is in your heart and in your best interest...Good luck to you..

Answer 4

No you don't have to change your name when you get married. I think the majority of people do but its a personal preference.

Answer 5

No one has to, in fact you have to be proactive to change you name, its not automatic. It used to be considered tradition and occured 90% of the time now its more like 70/30 and completely acceptable not to, today women are establishing their own careers and want to have continuity in business, or they simply have a unique last name, if your last names was Wyjudubikowski would you change it to Smith just because that was your husband's last name? how would anyone from your old schools find you?

Answer 6

Hell no!!! You can name yourself Mamaalitasitaboo if you want to. Do what you want. And don't let anyone tell you it's better for the children you might have. That's rubbish.
My older brother and I were raised by our stepfather, but kept our father's name.
No problem.
I took my first hubby's name, but took my name back when we divorced. Our son was adopted by MY parents but kept his father's name.
No problem.
I took my second hubby's name, took mine back when we divorced.
Took my 3rd hubby's name but mine back when we divorced, but our daughter has his name.
Not a problem.
Took my 4th hubby's name and our two sons have his name, but I took mine back A YEAR+ BEFORE we divorced.
Not a problem.
I am marrying for a 5th time, I will USE his name but will not change mine, I will finally KEEP my maiden name. We won't be having kids.
So there you have it. I have four kids and none have my name.
Not a problem. And I got rid of each name I married--not a problem.

Answer 7

No, it is not a legal requirement. A lot of women do, but also a lot of couples will change their names to both names, eg, campbell-Jones....Campbell being the surname of the woman, and Jones being the surname of the man. Some like it that way, some like to keep their maiden names and some like to take on the name of their husband....it is totally your choice.

Answer 8

No not in North Carolina it may be diffrent by state but here you can make your own choice of course I did but I did not have to and I was only give a set amount of time to do it in first social security then DMV then work school and all those other places for bills and such

Answer 9

It is not necessary to change your name when you get married. That choice is yours. Talk to your fiancee though, he may have always dreamed of being able to give a woman his last name. (I know mine did). Listen to or look up the lyrics for the country song from Dierks Bently "my last name." You'll see it means a lot to many men.

Answer 10

Most until recently did change their name, acknowledging their husband and family lineage.
I know it's optional, some hyphenate their last name but from my standpoint, these women don't want to give up their own indentity. Some b/c of power or ministry, business as well.
My wife was glad to take my name. It makes it easier for our children to know who their parents are by name.

Anyway, you give up your own "life" when you truly marry. You become one.