Ok so last summer (2006) my friend told me that she lost her virginity to a guy who was 16 and she was 18. She said they had sex at least ten times unprotected and I told her that was extremely dumb. They broke up in like September 06 and now she has a new boyfriend who she's been dating since like October 2006. In November she came out of nowhere and told me that she lied about losing her virginity. I didn't question her at all because it didn't really interest me, but now its starting to bug me. She's beginning to act self-rigteous and tell me I need to go get tested when I already went and I'm fine. I just want to say something, but I'm stopping myself. Should I confront her? What's your advice?
2007-01-12 07:35:07 · 36 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
It's not of any interest to you whether she lost her virginity or not, you sound more concerned with the fact that she lied. I would consider this friend more of an acquaintance than a true friend. Don't waste your time confronting her. If she has the personality of someone who can lie, she's not the most trustworthy of people. Make new friends, have enough respect for yourself not to stoop to her level with meaningless chatter and give her a wave from time to time and not much more. Sorry she turned out to be not such a good friend. Better to know sooner than to find out later.
2007-01-12 07:42:45 · answer #1 · answered by enjoyrselves 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Did you ever read the book (are you there got it is me margret) this kinda reminds me of that if you replace the period with sex.
I bet she lied to see if you would CONFESS your sex history to her.
If you have found her to be honest in most other aspects of your relationship, just tell her thanks for her advice and ignore the rest.
I am not sure how old you are but you have your whole life ahead of you to meet new HONEST people.
Dont confront her.
What will that prove.
She will either 1. deny it
2. avoid you because she will know you caught her in a lie.
Either way, YOU gain nothing but hard feelings from her.
There are certain levels of friendships,
make sure she is regulated to the outer levels of same.
She might be a good friend to go to a football game with but certainly NOT a friend to confide personal stuff with.
Enjoy her for the great things she does in your life and exclude her from the rest.
2007-01-12 07:40:54 · answer #2 · answered by lisa s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you haven't been tested and you have had unprotected sex then you do need to and so does she. I'm sorry but I don't think that the way she is acting is important here. She sounds like she is not mature enough to make good decisions about sex anyway. Both of you need to use protection or keep your legs closed.
2007-01-12 07:41:22 · answer #3 · answered by Amanda D 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It's always a good thing, when you have close friends or are thinking for a future relationship with someone, to be "open" in your communications with them. Whether you say it outright or sugar coat it, tell her her you feel, what you think, and let her determine if she can live with (understand) you and your feelings. People continue to change over their entire life, one day you can accept them, the next day you can't, the next day you can again...friendships and relationships are complicated so that's why you have to be "open" in your communications and let the other person know where you are at that moment in time.
2007-01-12 07:41:40 · answer #4 · answered by sophieb 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
of course...my last year was a bad one because i didn't get along god with some colleges not that we fight all the time...but we didn't like each other and lied to one another instead of saying what we really think about one another and it was offal i wanted to say what i think about them but knowing how they were they would chest after that turn all against me and i had to stay 6 hours a day with them and it would had been offal so i didn't say anything but that was even worse i guarantee it so i think you should confront her no mater what the consequences will be it's going to be better than this
2007-01-12 07:49:19 · answer #5 · answered by ella 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are, she really did lose her virginity, but now that she has a new boyfriend, she want everyone to think she was lying so no one tells her new guy that she's not a virgin. Just don't say anything and if she REALLY loves the new guy she'll tell him shes not a virgin.
2007-01-12 07:39:21 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Talk to your friend. Let her know that you are concerned about her and her health. Also talk to her about why she lied about losing her virginity. I'm wondering if she really did have sex and is now embarrassed about admitting it to you. Her self-righteousness may be from fear about what's she's done and the consequences.
Encourage her to get tested and use protection.
2007-01-12 07:41:00 · answer #7 · answered by tvelicia 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Become a better judge of character, after she told you she lied you should have starting to think about the other unnecessary lies she's told. You should either stay away from her or consider her an associate...then it doesn't matter if she wants to lie about dumb s h i t !
2007-01-12 07:40:30 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try sitting down and confront her. Ask her why she lied to you when your suppose to be friends. Friends don't lie to one another. If she has no answer as to why she lied? Then end the friendship because apparently she can't be trusted.
2007-01-12 07:40:45 · answer #9 · answered by Lace 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Confront her! Tell her she has no place telling you how to live your life and she's the one lying about stupid little things. What else has she been lying to you about? At the end of the day you are the only person who has to be happy with what you've done because you are the only one who's opinion of your life matters. I always weigh my day with something my grandmother told me once "I hope what you did was worth one day of your life, because that's what it cost you to do it."
2007-01-12 07:39:29 · answer #10 · answered by driftinglust 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋