We have been together for 4 years and want to do our wedding in may. But it was always hard and like everyone we got over it and worked at it. Lately it just seems harder. But I think I have invested so much in the relationship to not do it and I actually do want a ceremony and all. It might be cold feet who knows but do you think it will get better after we are married ?
2007-01-12 06:32:16 · 13 answers · asked by Blue 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
I had very similar feelings as this before my wedding...DO NOT ignore them!!! I have no been married for a year and a half and it has been hell. As of now, I moved out of my house. The warning signs were all there and I foolishly ignored them.
2007-01-12 06:36:28 · answer #1 · answered by Back in the game... 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
It will not get better after you get married. You have not invested so much time the relationship that you have to get married. Just because you can survive as a couple, doesn't mean he is right for you. Some people can get alone in a relationship, but aren't right for each other. It sounds like you don't want to do this. If that is the case, then don't. Don't be afraid to call things off just because it would be hard to dump him. I would talk to him about this first. Tell him how you feel. If you cannot talk to him about this, that is a bad sign. I would think about this a long time because this is your life also you are talking about. You deserve to be happy too.
2007-01-12 06:40:06 · answer #2 · answered by agassi8 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Once you get married, problems like this are intensified. Things will get harder and not easier. You should want to get married because you love someone and want to spend your life with them. You should not get married because you have invested a lot into the relationship and want a ceremony. This is your choice, but you seem a little more uncomfortable with things than you should be.
2007-01-12 06:40:51 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to love that person, not feel weird. Marriage is for life. 4 years is nothing compared to a life time of unhappiness. Look at your relationship and talk to each other and find out if you both might be feeling this way. Work on your relationship and wait on the marriage.
2007-01-12 07:00:33 · answer #4 · answered by springer 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you really love him and he really loves you, and you are not sure then talk to him about it and see if he is willing to wait maybe another 12 months or so. You have all the time in the world and marriage is nothing to rush into. It's a hell of a lot harder to get out of than it is to get into.
2007-01-12 06:57:08 · answer #5 · answered by golden rider 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you know you're not 100% comfortable with getting married, don't do it. Marriage is a serious thing that marks the beginning of a new life, it's tough to start all over.
2007-01-12 06:37:05 · answer #6 · answered by cloudyskies 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, nothing negative gets better after marriage - what's wrong becomes worse. Get premarital counseling to see if this is something you should go forward with. There's nothing worse than marrying someone because you don't want to think you "wasted" time.
2007-01-12 06:37:16 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
yes your are like you say cold feet. marriage is a lot of work and if you can get thought putting your wedding day together you can take on the marriage.
2007-01-12 06:38:23 · answer #8 · answered by celticdragon 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nooooo!!!
Four years is nothing compared to the rest of your life with someone you're not sure of...Don't think about a waste of time, think about it as an experience well learned. Good luck!! :D
2007-01-12 06:38:42 · answer #9 · answered by Mermaid 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No you need to work out your differences before marriage. They don't get better because of marriage.
2007-01-12 06:37:20 · answer #10 · answered by caribbeanmeme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋