Emotional affairs....Have you had one? Do you feel as tho you cheated?

Answer 1

Yes.. unfortunately I have. Usually you seek them out when your not getting what you need emotionally from your spouse or bf. In my case.. I don't think of it as an affair. It's what i needed to get me thru a very tough part of my life. However.. it's a dangerous road to tread and can easily lead to infidelity. : (

Answer 2

If you have to ask is it an affair is it cheating it is. If you spend time with someone else , talking about your life and taking that time away from your spouse you are cheating them and yourself all in the name of friendship. These friendships lead to other things. First it is a hug, then a peck on the cheek, etc, etc. All in the name of friendship. The chat on the phone innocent at first , then they get a little suggestive till they are full blown sex talks. I have not had one but my ex did with my youngest sister. It started out innocent enough, but too much time together , put them over the edge. It started as one day a week at lunch, stop by and picking up the trash, to a full blown affair and him buying diamond earrings for her. He called it a friendship, he always came home each night. He still went back to his apartment after we seperated each night . He doesn't call it an affair unless he spend the night. So, it is what you want to call it an affair or cheating it doesn't matter. You can call it anything to set your mind at easy. But what in fact it it is cheating.

Answer 3

i guess it depends on what you consider an emotional affair. have i developed a deep friendship with someone of the opposite sex online, then yes. do i feel guilty about that, not in the slightest., even if it did tick off dh. This is why, sometimes we will come across people in our lives with whom we just click, from the first hello. we can't help that, it's just part of life. I refuse to feel guilty for my emotions no matter what. I was not nor did i ever feel as if I was in love with this person, and to this day we still talk., but emotional bond was strong and immediate, like our souls have known each other for a very long time. how can you deny or feel guilty about that?

Answer 4

Don't worry about that or the cheating... try to get at what it is your'e missing at home first, and why that need isn't being met. That being said... I had an emotional affair with an 18 year old girl when I was 35. For my marraige, it was cheating. For yours, maybe, maybe not.

Answer 5

Emotional affairs -- getting emotionally attached to someone other than your spouse, without actually doing anything physical, are really being proven to be much worse than the old "fling." The reason is, that with the old style affair, it was just sex -- just the physical act. there was rarely any "love" involved. With the emotional affair, there is love -- just no sex. Falling in love emotionally with someone other than your spouse is devastating to the marriage, because it is affecting the brain -- not the organs.

Answer 6

Yes, I have had one, nearing the end of my first marriage. At the time I did not feel as though I was cheating until it moved to the physical affair and the lies escalated. The old affair helped me to quickly see when my current husband began to exhibit signs he was becoming overly involved with a co-worker. I searched the Internet and found help to resolve a lot of the issues with my old affair and help to cope with my H's. Karma is a fact...
I borrowed the following questionnaire from Dr. Shirley Glass PhD.s web site at http://www.shirleyglass.com . Answer yes or no, then click on the link below to score yourself.
1. Do you confide more to your friend than to your partner about how your day went?
2. Do you discuss negative feelings or intimate details about your marriage with your friend but not with your partner?
3. Are you open with your partner about the extent of your involvement with your friend?
4. Would you feel comfortable if your partner heard your conversation with your friend?
5. Would you feel comfortable if your partner saw a videotape of your meetings?
6. Are you aware of sexual tensions in this friendship?
7. Do you and your friend touch differently when you're alone than in front of others?
8. Are you in love with your friend?

Answer 7

I would consider it cheating but maybe not as serious as physical intimacy. Meaning, if my mate slept with another woman, I would leave him. If he was emotionnally connected to another woman, I would feel betrayed but try to figure out why and resolve it. The reason I consider it cheating and why I would be so hurt by it is because if I'm in a committed relationship, then I should be my partner's confidant and vice versa. I would feel betrayed and untrusting of our relationship if I found out he was telling his secrets and asking advice from someone else. If he's looking to someone else for emotional support, there is obviously something wrong with our relationship in the first place. I would feel extremely hurt if I found out he was speaking with someone online or by phone that I didn't know about.

Answer 8

As a guy we do not have emotional affairs unless we want out of what ever we are in. We go for a physical affair. We want sex not emotional attachment.

Answer 9

I had one, I feel it is cheating, cause when you cut the person out, or stop the relationship (even tho there is no sex involved), you miss it. And you gotta be careful, cause you will find yourself in a worse situation than an emotional jump off.

Answer 10

Yes I have and no I did feel like I cheated. Obviously something was missing and it is an attempt to fill the void. What is wrong with trying to be a fulfilled person? It does not necessarily mean your are abandoning the other person despite what social "norms" suggest. No one can fulfil all needs or likes.

Answer 11

I think almost everyone can feel something for someone else. That is what attraction is i wish and i am sure wives who have been cheated on wish... When we get married we could flip a switch and no longer feel emotion for anyone but our spouse. Love and feelings make us human. It is what we do with those feelings that matter!